


All or Nothing

by Falcon (obligatory_word)



Series: Shooting Star AU [1]
Category: Glee, Glee RPF
Genre: Aftermath of Violence, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Anxiety, Blaine Anderson & Sebastian Smythe Friendship, Blood, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Brain Damage, Canon Rewrite, Canon Trans Character, Caring Sebastian Smythe, Character Death, Depression, Drug Addiction, Eating Disorders, Episode: s04e18 Shooting Star, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Everybody shows up - Freeform, Everybody talks it out, Everyone Gets A Hug, Everyone Has Issues, Everyone Needs A Hug, Everythingphobia, Fix-It of Sorts, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship/Love, Gun Violence, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Marley is Not okay, Multi, Near Death, Nerd Sebastian Smythe, New Directions Reunion, New Directions as Family, No One Is Okay, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Blaine Anderson, Protective New Directions, Protective Sebastian Smythe, Redemption, References to Depression, Santana Lopez & Sebastian Smythe Friendship, School Shootings, Seizures, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Sexual Abuse, Sue Sylvester Is Actually Nice, Swearing, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Violence, some people deserve it, yes i made that tag up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:01:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 53,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23835805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/obligatory_word/pseuds/Falcon
Summary: When McKinley High is shot up by two shooters, the New Directions are hit with a startling realization and a painful truth. Nobody cared about each other until one of their members paid the price. The alumni New Directions just want everybody to be okay. So what does Santana do? She forces everybody back to Lima for a Glee reunion. Blaine thinks it’s a dumpster fire. Marley’s just really tired. Santana, as she eloquently put it, says that it was a family bonding.Family. Now that Marley’s come to think about it, most of the Glee kids don’t know what’s the meaning of family, her included. Sure, she has her mom, but looking back, she knew they were quite the broken family. So was Glee, both old and new, but while with her mom she was kept under pressure to be more than she should be, in Glee, she realized, that whoever she was was enough for the ragtag bunch of misfits.
Relationships: Blaine Anderson & Marley Rose, Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel, Jake Puckerman/Marley Rose, Marley Rose & Santana Lopez, Marley Rose & Sebastian Smythe, Rachel Berry/Finn Hudson, Santana Lopez/Brittany S. Pierce, Sebastian Smythe & Blaine Anderson & Marley Rose
Series: Shooting Star AU [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1717462
Comments: 90
Kudos: 95





	1. Chapter 1: Guns and Roses/ABC, Easy as 123

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, this is my first work for the fandom. I don't get the unhype around Marley, I think she's rather wonderful. And am I seriously the only one who wants the whole New Directions to be more of a family? Anyways, have fun. I don't proofread my work though.

The shooting was abrupt, fast, startling. It took Marley all but a few seconds to realize that the bangs were echoing down the halls weren’t the figments of her imagination from lack of eating, lack of sleep, lack of everything really. Everybody was screaming, ducking down by lockers and suddenly Marley was surrounded by a sea of bodies pushing to run away, run to the exit.

Her brain kicked into overdrive as she began to push past people, rushing for the choir room. The Glee club was right there, she had to go to the bathroom to vomit and she had been in the middle of walking back when it happened.

Another gunshot, loud and clear. To the left, maybe? She really did not want to pass out again, not like Sectionals. She was relatively surprised at how everyone blamed her, how everyone easily brushed it off, moved her eating disorder aside. Blaine, Sam, Jake and Unique were doing their best to help her, but without the support of the adults, there was practically nothing they could do.

And Marley was no less than human, and so she didn’t learn from her mistakes, feeling the need to be in more control after Sectionals, counting calories till it made her feel safer, made her feel like she was accomplishing something. Making her feel like she was worth something.

But now, all she was cursing herself for was for the woozy feeling she had as she reached the wall and near sagged against it, eyes fluttering shut for a moment as the world spun around her. The people and the noises made her head throb.

She tried to ignore it as she refocused on a goal: get to the choir room. Worry about her being sick later. She stumbled forward, using the lockers and the wall as a support, as people screamed and pushed past her, trying to get into rooms for safety. Her hand landed on the choir room door handle and with renewed strength, she turned it.

_Locked._

Locked? Panic began to really set in, the feeling of the bile rising in her throat as she turned the handle over and over, almost rattling the door in her frustration and near-blind panic, heart thumping wildly in her ears, contesting with the gunshots coming closer.

“It’s Marley! It’s Marley!” Marley screamed, and her voice sounded raspy to her own ears. “It’s me! Let me in!” She pounded on the door weakly with her fists, feeling the tears well up in her eyes. “Help!”

No, no, no, this was not happening. Marley was standing in the hallway, with a guy carrying a machine gun trotting down the hallway, and he looked mad.

He looked so, so mad...

No. Marley refocused her attention to the door again, rattling it in pure desperation. She could make a break for it, but what were the chances he would miss?

Now she could hear voices from the other side of the door. A bit of yelling, something heavy moving from nearby. Orders were barked and the door swung open, arms yanking her into the room. The motion made her dizzy as she stumbled as Blaine fumbled to lock the door before Sam could push past and race outside.

It was a bit of a near miss. The gunshots made Marley’s brain throb with how loud they were, and it was only after falling to the floor abruptly, no longer held up by Ryder and Kitty, did she realize how close she was to being missed.

There was a graze by the top of her left shoulder, stinging from the fabric sticking to her skin from the blood. Kitty choked back a sob as the shooter finally reached their door. Mr. Schuester and Coach Beiste were trying to move the filing cabinet to block the door, but he was pretty determined to come in.

“Marls...” Jake gasped, face turning pale at the blood. The banging at the door would not stop, and it made Marley’s head hurt even more as the filing cabinet began to rattle with the force the shooter was hitting.

“It’s fine, it’s just a cut,” Marley reassured, but everything still felt so weird and spinny, and was she always this weak? She held a hand to her shoulder as she tried to stand, but black dots overcame her vision as she shook her head and crouched down onto the floor, crawling to where Artie, Sam and Blaine were positioned next to the piano.

Sam was still sobbing for Brittany, Blaine was sending a message to Kurt probably, and Artie was staring at her, wanting to say something but not having the courage to.

Everything was really spinning. She couldn’t shake the screaming in her mind, how out of control she felt, how weak she was. She couldn’t stop the voice telling her that she failed at even remaining at a good weight. Being thin takes some sacrifice, she had reminded herself. If she couldn’t take it, she was no good.

Kitty wasn’t the one to put the idea in her head- Marley already had it there in the first place. Kitty was just the final push to this deep, deep hole that she could not seem to get out of.

She could feel the tears welling in her eyes as she fumbled for her phone. She had to tell her mom she was sorry. Sorry for being the worst daughter. Sorry for not being good enough. Sorry that she was even there in the first place.

A text wouldn’t do. Her fingers were too shaky and she was trembling so much that a few times the phone clattered out of her hands, disguised by the sound of the shooter breaking the door, only held back by the filing cabinet and Mr. Schuester and Coach Beiste’s attempts to keep him out.

But she can’t call. Her mom couldn’t escape. Her mom could be with the shooters for all she knew. She didn’t even know if she was coherent enough for a call anyways.

Still, she sent a frenzy of babbling text messages, ridden with typos and mistakes due to her trembling hands, tears welling up in her eyes causing the screen to blur and her ever present headache and dizziness that seemed to ebb away, since she wasn’t standing.

“Stay with us, okay, Marley? We’re gonna get you help,” Blaine was saying, but Marley wasn’t convinced anyone could help her.

“I’m fine, it’s just a cut,” she slurred. She frowned at herself, repeating her sentence. Her voice was still raspy. Odd. She never sounded like this after purging.

“But you’re not okay,” Blaine protested, but it was no use. Marley reached for his hand and gave it a squeeze, mouthing, ‘it’s okay’ to him.

The shot echoed throughout the whole room as Mr. Schuester and Coach Beiste hit the deck and back away from the filing cabinet, which was easily moved aside by the shooter with a bit of effort.

“Finally! You Glee kids gave me and my partner a hard time,” the man sighed, nodding to a woman wearing a black motorcycle mask standing in the doorway. “We can bust into all the classrooms we want, shoot up a load of kids, but the choir room, somehow, is the hardest place to get into.”

He seemed to grin cockily, as they both stepped into the room, rifles sweeping across them. Everybody’s eyes seemed to track the guns’ muzzle movements, even Marley, whose dizziness and headache had now faded into a faint weakness.

“You sure you want to shoot them? They’re Glee kids. It’s not like anyone would miss them,” the woman snorted, keeping her guns trained on Mr. Schue and Coach.

“No, no, no no... there’s two cheerleaders here! And jocks!” the man grinned, as Kitty edged closer to Blaine, Sam, Artie and Marley. He also gestured to the McKinley jackets strewn on the chairs.

Jake tensed, Ryder tensed. Unique cowered, making sure to stay as small as possible. Joe and Sugar edged away from the woman, who was walking towards them while keeping her gun trained on the teachers.

“What’s the difference? They joined this pathetic club.”

“What’s the difference-? Seriously, you ask me that question?!” the man fumed, clearly having a flair for the dramatics. “It means they have quite the diverse group here. Yeah, people would miss them.” He tilted his head mockingly, sizing up each of them. Blaine crouched protectively in front of Marley, his hand clutching her free hand tightly. Kitty was gripping onto Artie’s sleeve for dear life. Sam was staring down the gun.

“Just hurry up, the police are almost here,” the woman snapped impatiently.

“Yes, mom,” he snapped back sarcastically before he trained the gun on Kitty. “I might as well start with the stupid blonde cheerleader bitch who looks like she makes everybody’s lives miserable. Am I right or am I right?”

Everyone stared at him with fear. His face twisted into a scowl as he stepped closer and backhanded her. “ANSWER ME, BITCH!”

“... no.” The answer was out of Marley’s mouth before she could stop it. “She’s not. I’m the one who makes everybody’s lives miserable. She’s been dealt a bad hand. I’m the one who cost everybody in this room a chance to prove themselves. A chance to show that we are better. She didn’t. I’m the one who burdens everybody with things that I don’t even know I ask of people. Like approval. Their time of day. Their love. I’m the one who doesn’t give anything back but keeps taking, taking, taking.”

The man still had the gun trained on Kitty, but he was staring at her in amusement. Everybody in the choir room was silent, even the woman tilted her head in rapt fascination and morbid curiosity.

“And who might you be?”

“I’m- I’m...” Marley had to swallow hard to push down a wave of nausea and dizziness. “I’m Marley Rose.”

“Rose... Rose... ah, yes... your father walked out on you when you were three. That man was a leeching scumbag. A conniving bastard in his own right and so many colourful adjectives I could describe him with. He said something about a daughter and a wife... he said you were the biggest mistake of his life.” He grinned wickedly when he saw Marley let out a tiny gasp.

“How... how do you know my dad?”

“Your dad is a pretty popular drug dealer and drug runner. News travels. Why am I not surprised that his daughter turned out to be more of a wimp than he was?” he mused, looking at all of them. “You her boyfriend?” he addressed Blaine.

“No, but stay away from her,” Blaine snapped.

“Nice try, pretty face, but I think that’s not the case.”

His hand snapped out, yanking at Marley’s hair as she screamed, dragging her along the floor by her hair.

“Marley!” Blaine cried, but fell back as the man aimed his gun at him.

“C, change of plans... we shoot one person. Only one. These kids look like they need to be taught a lesson,” he aimed this at the woman.

“They are just kids!” Mr. Schue yelled, and the woman raised her rifle again.

“No talking. And A, for what it’s worth, that seems so much fun than just bloody murder. Didn’t we come to leave a message?”

A shrugged, before dropping Marley unceremoniously in the middle of the choir room floor. “I think we need to leave them several.”

“Get off,” Marley tried, trying to crawl away from A, but he set a heavy boot on her chest, making her wheeze. He smirked further as he could feel her ribs practically through the thin material of her shirt.

“Glee kids... did you know she felt this way? I don’t think anyone’s supposed to be that ghastly looking, don’tcha think? I mean, man, this is too easy to do. Just watch.” He applied more pressure to the right side of Marley’s ribs, earning him a snap and an ear-piercing wail that quickly turned into a rasp and muffled sobs. He looked around, knowing that everyone was watching. They couldn’t just look away. But he needed an answer. He needed to wipe it in their faces. “Well?!”

“Maybe? Yes? N-no...?” Ryder tried, and A barked out a laugh.

“I’m gonna take that as a ‘some people know but don’t do shit about it’ kinda thing. Y’know? But it’s really odd. Usually you’d notice when someone was that thin. Marley, dear, did you hear that? You don’t mean anything to them. You probably never will. If your dad didn’t want you, what makes you think they will?”

“That’s not true!” Kitty defended, and A barely flinched, now putting a foot on Marley’s throat.

“If you don’t tell the truth, I’ll slowly suffocate her,” he said calmly, applying more pressure. Marley’s eyes bulged, hands flying up to the boot on her throat and trying to push it off. Her breaths caught and there was a radiating pain in her chest each time she moved.

She wheezed, and then whimpered as the very action of breathing seemed to cause so much pain. Everything was spinning, blurring, black dots appearing in her vision.

Her lungs screamed for oxygen. But as they did, her broken ribs seemed to stab into her body even more. Her face was turning purple as Kitty finally could not take the whimpers and mini screams of pain and deep gasping anymore.

“... it’s true,” Kitty relented and A sighed, lifting his foot from Marley’s throat. She took a deep breath of air, before choking and groaning in pain.

“See how easy that was? To admit it?”

Everybody else in the room but Marley knew it was a partial lie. They did care. Marley meant something to them... but they didn’t do anything about it. They abandoned her. But Marley never abandoned them. She was always that kind, supportive friend. Always with the smile and being helpful. She’ll stand up to others for others, but not for herself.

Her pulled his foot back and kicked Marley in the stomach hard. He angled it into her chest too, making her scream further, as blood spurted from her mouth, staining her teeth and the ground in front of her. She coughed out more blood weakly, curling up slightly as it dripped from her mouth. Her tired eyes met Kitty’s for a while as A circled around her like a predatory eagle.

“What is it they probably think? Oh, I know. Everybody, you may stop me if I am wrong. But at least one of you thought and felt these following thoughts...” he cleared his throat, and then he slammed his foot into Marley’s back.

“Why was she in Glee club? I don’t want her here.”

His foot landed on her left wrist, offering another painful snap and crack and break. Kitty looked away at the words. Artie looked guilty.

“I don’t even know why I’m friends with her.”

Unique closed her eyes as he aimed a kick at her face, towards her jaw. The kick broke her jaw as her mouth hung open, leaking blood from the corner of her mouth. There was a whimper, a whine.

“She’s too high maintenance.”

Mr. Schue and Coach Beiste fidgeted. He slammed his foot fully into her stomach, and a low, pained groan came from her as she writhed on the floor. Her eyes were half open, trying to focus on Kitty, Artie, Sam and Blaine.

“I’m embarrassed to be with her.”

Jake, Ryder and Sam hung their heads. A grabbed her by the front of her shirt and punched her in the face, aiming for her eye. He missed a little, slamming his fist into her nose and... now that was bleeding too. There was a red mark beginning to appear on her face, by her right eye.

“I have not thought one of those things,” Blaine steadfastly said.

“That’s because deep down inside, you know she’s struggling. So you pity her. You don’t actually care, you just pity the little girl you see inside this one.” Marley’s head turned a little to focus on Blaine, as if pleading for him to make it true.

“No.” But Blaine’s tone gave it all away. Marley’s eyes just turned sad, resigned, hopeless.

“Wow... no one cares huh?” A chuckled, kicking Marley in the ribs a few more times, causing more snaps and breaks and hoarse screams of pain. “You all should be ashamed.”

“You’re hurting her!” Kitty shouted this time, voice cracking due to fear, guilt, anger...

“My dear blonde cheerleader...” A laughed lowly, leveling the gun at Kitty’s forehead. “... you all already did.”

BANG!

“Psych!” A grinned, as Kitty flew backwards. Artie moved to catch her, just barely managing to protect her head from coming in a rough landing. “HA! You really think I was going to get rid of one of the people who needed to hear that message? You all are funny!”

Kitty’s eyes fluttered open, as she tried to register what was going on. She should be dead.

But she wasn’t.

“Marley!” Jake yelled, as Marley’s hand was pulled away from her stomach to find the blood dripping from her hands.

He shot Marley instead.

“It seemed fitting. I thought, why not get rid of what you all didn’t care about? After all, it seems easier that way than dealing with the problem. It’s a blessing and a curse, honestly. I’ll put her out of her misery, but I’m not that kind with a bullet to the head. I want you all to feel my message... and Marley, your dad has now repaid his debt to me. I guess your life finally came in useful.”

“Marley!” Kitty screamed, and every part of Marley felt cold, except for her broken bones. Those, she felt, were hot and swollen and she couldn’t move them much. Her left hand was limp, wrist broken to the point where she could see a bit of the bone jutting out and it was burning, burning hot pain. Her vision was going in and out as her body expelled more blood via her mouth. Her right hand pressed against her stomach, where he shot her, and she could feel the stabbing pain, as if someone placed a hot poker at her stomach and left it there. She could vaguely realize the shooters leaving.

“Someone get a towel!”

“This jacket will work, right?”

“Hey, Marley, stay awake for me, honey, okay?”

Her eyes were scanning, unable to focus on any one thing. Faces were drifting in and out of focus, the pain seemed to be overwhelming. She felt like she had felt this pain so much that she practically lived in this state of pain. Her eyelids were heavy, like bricks weighing them down.

All Marley’s life she had been faced with bullying, loss of control, pain, suffering, being ostracized and now she was dying. It was so peaceful she felt like she didn’t deserve it. But she also knew it wouldn’t matter if she slipped away.

No one cared.

“I love you guys anyways...” she slurred, almost unheard except by Blaine and Sam.

She was so tired. She was ready to just lie back and fall asleep. Ryder was freaking out at this point, Unique was stuck between pacing, Sam was about to cry with worry and fear, Jake looked like he wanted to scream, Kitty screamed, Joe was praying feverishly to God, Sugar was... oddly calm despite the tears flowing down her face, Artie had a death grip on Kitty’s Cheerio cheerleading uniform, face white as a ghost, Mr. Schue was barking instructions but half of them made zero sense, Coach Beiste was trying to calm everybody down, Blaine was still trying to uselessly place his hands over Marley’s bullet wound, as if it would desperately put back all the blood she lost into her body.

“It’s okay,” Marley whispered. “You can let go now.”

“No,” Blaine protested, shaking his head wildly. “No, no, no, no. Please, god no. Please, Marley. Marley, no.”

“HEY!” Jake screamed, running to the broken down door. “HELP US! HELP US! SOMEBODY!”

Marley’s eyes were hazy and unfocused, flitting from one face to another as the corner of her mouth twitched up into a barely noticeable smile.

“I’m sorry.”

“No, no, what are you sorry for?” Ryder asked, gripping Marley’s free hand as if hanging onto it would prevent her from dying.

“Everything.” Her eyes flicked from Blaine to Ryder to Kitty. Sam had moved away, unable to take being away from Brittany, running his hands through his hair as his hysterical outside cracked and the tears began to flow. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey, hey, it’s okay... it’s okay,” Ryder reached out and tenderly wiped Marley’s tears. She hissed lightly at the touch, whimpering slightly. “You don’t have to apologize for anything.”

“If anything, we’re the ones who have to apologize,” Kitty said, kneeling on the pool of Marley’s blood that seemed to grow bigger every second. “Marley, please.”

“I’m scared,” Marley admitted. “I’m scared of dying and being alone again. Don’t leave me.”

“We won’t,” Artie finally said, tears springing free. “Never again. We’re family.”

“Don’t leave me, I’m scared,” Marley uttered quietly, and then her eyes slipped shut. “I’m sorry.”

Blaine roared. He roared like he could shout out all that he was feeling, all the pain and frustration and the anger and everything- and he was scared too. He considered Marley to be one of his closer friends, the only one from the newbies he really connected with.

He shouted and screamed and sobbed as the paramedics arrived with Jake in tow and when he saw Blaine trying to gather Marley in his arms, sobbing, his heart shattered, running towards Blaine.

“Where the hell were you?!” Blaine shouted, as the paramedics were trying to extract Marley from him. No one was sure if he was shouting at Jake or the paramedics. “SHE NEEDED YOU! YOU WEREN’T THERE!”

“Sir, please let go...”

“Blaine,” Sam said calmly, putting a hand on Blaine’s shoulder, the cheerleader stiffening at the touch and turning to Sam. The tears told him all he needed to know. “Let go of her.”

No one wanted Blaine to. The energy was abuzz in the room. Because they all felt guilty for what they didn’t do. And letting her go felt like a finality, a regret they would have to carry for the rest of their lives, regardless of whether she lives or dies.

Sam’s grip on his shoulder tightened. “Please.”

Blaine slowly uncurled from Marley, and for the first time, he dreaded calling the old members. He dreaded calling Santana and telling her what happened to her mentee, dreaded calling Finn to tell him what happened to one of their Glee members, dreaded calling Kurt saying that he failed one of his friends by failing to be there. Not the first time that happened, anyways, but he promised himself that it would never happen again.

Everything was a blur once she left him. It took some tugging, some sobbing, some begging, pleading and some inner strength in all of their heads to get up and trudge towards the door.

For the first time, they all shrank back from the bright sun like a giant spotlight on their misdeeds. And for the first time, Mr. Schue would weep when he got back home. For the first and last time, Finn would feel like he failed a student.


	2. Chapter 2: Kitty Claws/Blaine To See

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes you don't see. Sometimes you need help. But sometimes, you don't know how to help either. All you can do is be there.

“Thank God!” Tina yelled, rushing over to hug Blaine. He jerked back, stiffly. His movements were more robotic than anything, eyes fixed blankly ahead as he slowly tilted his head downwards to look at Tina, eyes burning from the number of times he rubbed it on his sleeve, unable to use his hands due to them being covered in Marley’s blood.

Tina took in the sad environment, the glassy eyes, the dried tear tracks on everybody’s faces, their silence, the blood. She looked around, trying to find people missing. “Where’s Marley and Brittany?”

“We don’t know where Brittany is,” Joe admitted.

“But Marley? I thought she was with you,” Tina asked, confused, then the shock began to really catch up to her, taking in their faces, taking in everything. The pain, the sorrow, the regret, the guilt.

“She was.” Artie’s hands were hanging out of the sides of his wheelchair, eyes glazed over and staring into the distance. “Then she wasn’t.”

“I should have been there.” Tina’s hands flew up to her mouth, horrified. “I should have been with you guys.”

“No you shouldn’t,” Blaine rasped softly, voice cracking.

“I wanted to be with you guys!” Tina yelled back.

“It wasn’t nice, Tina. You wouldn’t have... we all didn’t...” Blaine stared at the sky.

“We stick together!”

“Did we ever, for Marley?” Unique shouted, voice wavering slightly as she stepped up to Tina, seeing Blaine unresponsive. “Do you want to know what happened in there? She was _beaten_. She was battered. She was so thin her ribs cracked with a little force. She was so weak it took a man stepping on her wrist to break it. And all the while we realized that we weren’t the best to her. He beat her and shot her because she took attention away from Kitty by saying she was the one who was a burden to all of us by losing Sectionals! And you know the last thing she said? SHE FUCKING APOLOGIZED TO US FOR EVERYTHING! In low self-esteem language, that means she was sorry she even existed in our lives to begin with. Let that sink in. She. Was. Sorry. She. Existed. Marley Rose, our own version of your Rachel, had such low self-esteem that she was sorry she existed,” Unique scoffed, stepping closer. “No one has passed out at Sectionals before. But I don’t think you let someone feel so underappreciated they were sorry for their own existence.”

“Unique...” Ryder whispered, stepping forward. “Let it be.”

“Hell no I’m not letting this be!” Unique spun around to face him angrily, her face turning redder as her voice rose higher and higher. “I was her best friend! She had my back since day one! I should have had her back! Maybe then she wouldn’t be this worse off... maybe then she wouldn’t have been shot at all...” Her voice became nothing more than a whisper.

It didn’t escape anybody that she used _was_.

Sure, Marley could be a little extra, a little goofy, sunny, stubborn, her sense of justice too strong sometimes, her sense of morality an annoying trait that made people think she was a goody-two-shoes most of the time. Maybe her songwriting wasn’t the best, maybe her songwriting needed a little improvement, but maybe if they all worked together they could create a masterpiece.

They were all works in progress, but Marley was the best out of all of them.

(Rachel would later state that of all the members so far, Marley was the only one who hadn’t cheated on anybody, hadn’t been a total bitch, hadn’t done anything that was remarkably stupid and wrong. Eating disorders didn’t count- they realized with Mercedes and Quinn before and Kitty later. To Ryder he found it bitter that it took Kitty coming out with an ED for everybody to take it seriously. Everybody found it bitterly ironic even later, when the truth came out about Kitty’s involvement.)

Joe sighed, slouching slightly as he cast his eyes up skywards, hoping to God that with one member down, they could find the other one quickly safely and unharmed.

Jake spoke up, voice thick, echoing everybody’s feelings, thoughts... anything.

“Brittany got shot too.”

The world around Sam shifted and tilted on its axis as he gaped at the younger Puckerman, staring right at him mouth ajar. “You’re kidding. How did you know? Where is she? Where the fuck-? Why didn’t you tell me earlier?! Tell me fucking where she is!” Sam roared, closing the distance in an instant and grabbing the front of Jake’s shirt. “ANSWER ME!”

“When I went outside to look for help... I checked everywhere for other people. I heard Brittany crying in one of the corners. She was bleeding quite badly and I helped her outside... and then she told me not to blame myself,” Jake whispered. “That’s when I got the paramedics to go back for Marley.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“My heart shattered. I didn’t want yours to break either.”

“Piece of shit!” Sam yelled, shoving Jake back. Mr. Schue stopped Sam from attacking Jake any further by throwing a hand across his chest to block him. “You should have just told me!”

“Like it would have made anything better!” Jake shouted back.

“You don’t know me,” Sam snarled. Coach Beiste stepped up, separating the two.

“That’s enough. You both arguing isn’t going to reverse what happened. We need to calm down, now.”

“I need to call Kurt,” Blaine said suddenly, stepping away and tapping at his phone. “I need to tell him- I can’t- _I can’t_...”

“It’s okay,” Sugar whispered, rubbing his back. “We’re here.”

“No,” he choked out, fumbling with his phone and putting it up to his ear. “Kurt, please, pick up. Pick up. Pick up.”

A choked sob, as he almost collapsed to the ground, his knees weak as he finally heard Kurt’s simple, _“Hello? Blaine?”_

“Kurt.” His voice was choked, as if someone was strangling him. He didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, or anything. “Kurt, I love you.”

_“I don’t understand-“_

“ _I love you,_ ” Blaine repeated forcefully this time, before sobbing. “I just... I just wanted you... I just wanted you to know that. I needed for you to know that. And I know I’ve apologized a million times for what I’ve done and did a lot of terrible things and I know we’re reconnecting again but-“ Blaine sank to the floor, on his knees, hands covered in Marley’s blood as he stared at the stains. “There was a shooting in the school.”

There was a gasp over the phone as Kurt fumbled with something, glass shattering in the background. He could hear Santana and Rachel in the background, yelling about something. About breaking glass. They abruptly stopped, there were murmurs of concern, then- that was Rachel’s voice now. _“You’re on speaker, Blaine.”_

“I- I just... we had something happen. Something happened and the school was shot up,” Blaine said, and Rachel’s gasp could be heard over the phone.

 _“Are you okay?”_ Rachel asked, gently. _“Was anyone hurt?”_

“I’m okay physically.” There was a sigh of relief over the phone. “Brittany and Marley got hurt.”

Utter silence.

 _“Britt and Marley got hurt?”_ Santana asked, slowly. She was in shock. She was in disbelief. She sounded like she wanted someone to slap her to get her back into reality.

It finally registered in Blaine’s head that Santana still loves Brittany. She was still head over heels in love with Brittany and no one could say anything about it, even if Brittany is dating Sam at the moment. And Marley was her mentee. Santana was fiercely protective of anyone she considered to be worth protecting. Blaine wondered if Santana could see what he sees in the newbies: potential. Brittany was self-explanatory but he wondered why Santana was attached to Marley. Maybe they were closer than he thought.

With all that was said and done, would Santana feel guilty too?

_“Baby Blaine? You still there?”_

Blaine blinked back into reality, forcing himself to look away from the incriminating red on his hands and getting to his feet and walking. Each step felt like he was sinking into cement, deeper and deeper. He was walking in an aimless direction.

“Y-yeah, I’m still here.” It felt like someone dumped an ice cold bucket in his face, shocking him. Santana’s voice felt like that at the moment, probably taking over speaking since Rachel was probably busy with Kurt, who he could hear sobbing in the background. “For now.”

 _“No, don’t you dare speak like that,”_ Santana snapped, and there was a rustle as she shifted. _“I don’t care where everybody is now, I will call for a full New Directions reunion even if I have to drag Puckerman’s ass out of college and whip Finn into coming back. They are his students, and if Mr. Schue was caught in the crossfire like that, then he’s no use. I don’t care if Mr. Schue and Finn are feuding, I don’t care if you all say you’re fine because you’re all clearly not. I am dragging the entire New Directions back to Lima and you will not say a word to stop anything about it.”_

“Santana, I-“

“ _Blaine Anderson if you are about to say that it’s too much for us to suddenly come there and possibly leave everything behind abruptly, I’m sorry, but Rachel and Kurt are packing as we speak and they have sent texts to Puck, Finn, Quinn, Mike and Mercedes and they have AGREED, so shut your pie hole about it and accept our love! I don’t give it out that easy. God, I think I see why I let Berry organize these things...”_

Blaine closed his eyes and smiled, listening to Santana rant in the background. He knew it was to distract him from the madness around him as the paramedics came up to him and looked him over.

“You okay, man?” Ryder asked softly, coming up to him.

“No. I don’t think I’ll ever be,” Blaine said, knowing that Santana was trying to act extra tough and sassy to hide the fact that she was downright terrified.

 _“Blaine- stop,”_ Santana huffed. _“They will get through this. Look, I will flay you if you tell anybody else but... I’m scared too. I’m scared for Baby Marley and Britt. I know there’s so much more you’re not telling me because you can’t bring yourself to tell me. I’m downright terrified that you’re not telling me fucking anything other than there was a shooting and both of them were hurt. But we’re coming back, we’re not letting you guys go through this alone, alright? We are family, and if the newbs don’t know that yet, they’re going to know it now.”_ A pause. _“I’m not just saying that ‘cause Puckerman’s brother is in there and he’s literal family.”_

“Santana, you are a secret softie.”

 _“Shut up.”_ She paused for a moment. _“Kurt wants the phone back. We’re all hopping onto the first flight as soon as we can. I’ll leave you both to talk things out later, alright? He’s a mess.”_

“Alright. See you soon, Santana.”

_“Take care of yourself, baby Blaine. And remember: you’re alive now. And you’re safe.”_

Blaine hung up the call as Ryder placed himself next to him. Everybody was getting rollcalled, Coach Beiste and Mr. Schuester were called by Sue Sylvester to help the rest of the teachers do rollcall. Blaine imagined the tears that came when mentioning Marley’s name. It felt like a stab in his heart as Kitty joined him and Artie was just in his wheelchair, staring at the sky blankly. Jake was keeping a wide berth from Sam, who was talking to Unique and Tina. Joe and Sugar were trying to pray together, but they were practically supporting each other.

Kitty’s mouth opened, then shut suddenly. Then... “I didn’t get to tell Marley it wasn’t her.”

“Wasn’t her what?” Ryder asked.

But Kitty just shook her head, suddenly sobbing and curling into Blaine’s side as he put his arm around her and let her sob into his shirt. Artie was practically indisposed, staring into space. Sam was dry-heaving. Unique was actually vomiting into the ground, Tina rubbing both of their backs. Jake was kicking the shit out of a tree, yelling and screaming in frustration as he also picked up rocks and chucked it at the tree, barely satisfied when the rocks made a heavy _thunk_ on the tree.

Ryder was just looking at Jake, sliding out of his seat and watched him pull back his fist and punch the tree as if it would make everything go away. For all his efforts, the tree barely moved. With a roar, Jake continued to slam his fist into the tree. His shoulders shook with silent sobs as every punch grew weaker and weaker as he finally threw a slow punch, missing the tree entirely, and then sliding to the ground as his back hit the tree.

“Did you get it out of your system?” Ryder asked quietly.

“No,” Jake muttered, but he made no move to get up. He was panting heavily, sweating hard, though Ryder couldn’t tell the difference between his tears and his sweat. “I’m her boyfriend, Ryder. I’m her fucking boyfriend and I didn’t see this. I didn’t fucking see any of this.”

“I’m pretty sure none of us ever saw a school shooting to happen today, so...”

“No!” Jake shouted, and Ryder flinched slightly, but relaxed. “I mean her. I didn’t see any of that. I didn’t see that she needed help. I didn’t see that she still relapsed. I didn’t see she didn’t love herself. I didn’t see because I was fucking blind to all of it!” Jake picked up a stone and hurled it far away from them.

“Love is a blindfold,” Ryder said softly, staring into the distance. “You love someone so much that you don’t see their flaws. It doesn’t matter what kind of love it is, you just think they’re perfect and can do no wrong. You put them on a pedestal and turn a blind eye to what falls from the top because you’re focused on the perfect artifact.”

“When did you get so wise?” Jake smiled, though it was mostly forced. Ryder would still take it.

“Because that’s what I did with Katie. And it’s what I did before... but that’s a story for another day.” Ryder patted his shoulder awkwardly, and noticed Jake was still heaving, panting from his efforts to destroy the tree. “I think we all owe Marley an apology.”

Ryder was absolutely gutted. He thought she stopped. He thought everything was okay. But no. He should have pushed. Should have done something. But now it’s too late. It’s too late and Marley absolutely paid the price.

“Guys...” Kitty’s voice drew all of them back to the present as Joe and Sugar came up to Blaine and Kitty, hands outstretched to Kitty who looked like she was going to faint. “I... I don’t feel so good.”

“Did you eat?” was the first question that popped into Joe’s mind, frowning at her.

“No... I missed one of Sue’s shakes today...”

Artie looked back at Kitty and at Unique and Sam vomiting and having a panic attack respectively. Sam was rocking back and forth, hands over his ears and whimpering. Unique sighed as she stopped vomiting, looking tired, and Tina was trying really hard to comfort them both, looking up to Artie for help.

“Mr. Schue!” Artie yelled, rolling over the ground to get to the four staff members deep in discussion about the situation. Coach Beiste had silent tears rolling down her face. Sue was comforting Becky with a hand on her back. Miss Pillsbury had looked up at Artie shouting, Joe catching Kitty as she collapsed, Unique and a bunch of vomit in front of her, Sam having a panic attack. Ryder and Blaine were trying to help Tina with Sam. Sugar was running to the teachers, looking terrified. “Mr. Schue we need help.”

“Will,” Emma said, swatting Will’s hand. “We need to help them!”

“Go and help them,” Sue said, trying to calm Becky down. “I’ll stay with Becky.”

“Hey, hey,” Will said, crouching by Sam. “It’s Mr. Schue. You’re safe now.”

“No-no- no we have to get out, Mr. Schue, we have to _get out_ , we have to _**get out-**_ “ Sam gasped for a breath, grasping at Blaine blindly. Blaine hardly blinked, as Ryder put a hand on his back, but instead of rubbing aimlessly like Tina, he motioned for Sam to lean against Blaine.

“Can you feel his heartbeat?” Ryder asked quietly. “Can you try to match his?”

“Don’t worry, Mr. Schue, we got Sam. Help Unique, I think she’s throwing up due to nerves and stress and Kitty passed out,” Blaine whispered, controlling his breathing to keep his heartbeat steady. “Tina, could you help Sugar in getting us all some water?”

“We’re going to the hospital in a bit,” Will whispered. “If you want to go home, that’s fine. I don’t blame you.”

“No. Us Glee freaks stick together,” Ryder said sadly. “And I don’t think we’re leaving each other alone, not for a hot minute. I think we all... have something to say to each other.”

“And the others... they’re coming back. Something about supporting us, organized by Santana,” Blaine muttered. “I tried to talk them out of it, but you know Santana...”

“I think we need their help,” Will admitted, hanging his head. “I should have known something was up. I just... thought you kids could handle it.”

Blaine smiled sadly. “As you say, we’re only kids.”

Will got up to help Joe with Kitty, who was pale, paler than ever. The paramedics looked her over then frowned.

“She needs to be taken to the hospital. She’s very dehydrated, she’s severely underweight. She has electrolyte imbalances, which could lead to fatality.”

“What?”

“We need to move to the hospital now.”


	3. Chapter 3: Not Berry Good/She Lopez You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rachel, Kurt and Santana arrive. Quinn and Mike show up a little later. Everybody's at the hospital, and everybody's stressed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here, have more sad. We have Finn here too.

“Rachel,” Kurt said, putting a hand on her shoulder. “Are you okay?”

“No.” She looked like she wanted to cry at any moment. Kurt had done enough of that earlier, and he was just concerned for his friend. Santana was scowling out the window, fingers drumming lightly on the seat. She kept shifting in her seat, as if uncomfortable. Rachel just was humming a Broadway song under her breath, but her eyes flicked around rapidly.

“Rachel,” Kurt said, quietly. “It’s okay to be scared and sad. You didn’t have to come if you didn’t feel comfortable.”

“First, I need to see everyone safe with my own eyes, not just Blaine. And Blaine could be hiding something, he could be hurt, and I...” Rachel trailed off with a shudder. “Secondly, that’s not possible. With how Santana is, I wouldn’t be getting out of this trip even if I didn’t want to come.”

Both of them glanced over to the Latina whose gaze was fixed to something outside the plane window, fingers drumming anxiously by her leg as she shifted yet again.

“Santana didn’t tell me, but... when is everybody else coming?” Kurt asked.

“Puck and Finn just need to clear up some stuff at the college. They’ll be over in half a day or so. When Finn got my call and I told him what happened he was so eager to leave right there and then. Santana reached Quinn, she’s coming a little later than us. Mercedes said she’ll meet us at the airport. Mike’s meeting Quinn and tagging along on her flight.”

“We left in such a hurry we don’t even know where we’re staying,” Kurt said.

“Santana says she has all of us covered. I’m not sure what that means.”

“We’re staying at a big rented house with multiple bedrooms,” Santana spoke up, spooking them both with the sudden brusque tone in her voice. “Big enough for all of us to stay in, and if the newbs wanna join they’re welcome to.”

“Santana, that’s expensive,” Kurt protested.

Santana smiled a little bitterly. “My mom keeps up to date with Lima news. As soon as I mentioned all of us coming to support the newbs, she did this for us. She told me it was a good thing I was coming back. A sort of... sorry... for my abuela.”

Santana was coming back. That was a sight never beholdened before, even though it was mainly for Britt and Marley.

Rachel loved Marley as well. Kurt found her a little plain jane and boring, but had to admit the girl had sass when she wanted to. They were a little surprised to find her dating Jake as opposed to Ryder, but the three were as thick as thieves. Kurt and Mercedes loved Unique. With enough style, Unique could be a diva with them. Rachel had grown to appreciate big belters, and had loved Unique’s uniqueness. Jake and Ryder were the pair for trouble, but Mike liked to dance with Jake a lot and all the boys often bonded over video games or McKinley High’s football team. Kitty was a wildcard. Santana disliked Kitty from the get go. Rachel was relatively close to Kitty for some strange reason that Kurt could not fathom but Kitty also had Quinn. Kurt could just about tolerate Kitty on a good day.

“Oh.” They knew the story of Santana’s disastrous coming out to her abuela.

“Yeah, so... you’re welcome,” Santana shrugged as the plane rattled and the seatbelt sign came on. “You’re very welcome.”

As soon as they touched down in Ohio again, Kurt could feel his stomach turning flip flops and churning something that wasn’t there. He needed to see them. He needed to see Blaine. Needed to hold him, touch him, never let go. He felt the urge to grab his friends and wrap them in bubble wrap.

He could barely process the entire way out of the airport, meeting Mercedes with Rachel and Santana practically mirroring his dead gaze and blank look.

“I wish we meet in a happier time,” Mercedes said slowly, taking in their slouches, red and puffy eyes, dried tear tracks. There was a sort of desperate air around them, as they sped to the aforementioned house as quickly as possible to unpack, shower, freshen up a little before heading to the next destination.

The hospital.

Will looked like he had just rolled out of bed. Blaine remained resolute. Jake was pacing back and forth. Sam was snoozing on a chair. A heavyset lady- Marley’s mom- was seated at one of the chairs, eyes clenched shut as if she was scared to open them. Tina was clutching a water bottle as if it was her lifeline. The other parents who showed up were pacing, talking to the nurses. Some were students too, waiting anxiously for results of their friends to be released.

“Where’s Ryder, Sugar, Joe, Unique, Artie and Kitty?” Rachel asked.

Blaine’s eyes were torn from the hallway to meet Kurt’s eyes, and his eyes widened as he leapt up and crushed Kurt in a hug. The dried blood still on his arms was beginning to crust and flake off.

“You came.”

“Of course I did.”

“We’re taking shifts. They went home to their parents, a change of clothes... and they all insisted on coming back,” Will sighed, exhausted. “Except Kitty. Kitty was admitted.”

“What? Why?” Rachel asked, a little in shock.

“She was starving herself. She was a lot more smart about it, unlike Marley but... Marley was really aiming to lose weight. Kitty wanted to maintain her figure. But she still starved. She lost consciousness, and then the paramedics took her away.”

“Let Q-ball see her,” Santana said simply. “I just want to see baby Rachel first. I still need to have a conversation with mini-Q though, so don’t get me wrong.”

“You’re looking at him,” Blaine said wearily, releasing Kurt.

“I didn’t mean the New Rachel, I meant the baby mini sized version of one fucking Rachel Berry. Or are you telling me you have a pair of Xs in your DNA and no Y?” Santana snarked.

Ironically, Marley was taller than Rachel.

“That can be labelled as transphobic on so many levels, San,” Kurt said, slapping Santana’s arm.

“Sorry. Should I just call her mini Streisand? Then call Rachel Big Nose Streisand?”

“Hey!” Rachel scowled.

Blaine chuckled hollowly. He knew what they were doing. Santana, in her own Santana way, was trying to distract them, being amusing, bickering, trying to show normal. But now a new sense of tiredness was beginning to overtake all of them. It felt a lot like drowning, a sort of sinking feeling. He didn’t feel the energy to swim up anymore, just drifting, sinking... everything muffled around him.

He could still hear them, but he just couldn’t listen.

“Blaine?” Kurt asked, drawing his attention back to Kurt, who was gazing at him with worried eyes. “You okay?”

“I’m so tired.” Blaine let his eyes slip shut and laid his head on Kurt’s shoulder, arms hanging loosely by his side.

“Do you wanna wash your hands?” Kurt asked gently.

Will, Tina and Jake looked alarmed as he asked this, but before he could say anything, the doctor came out, approaching them.

“Family of Marley Rose?”

Tina nudged Sam awake as Millie Rose bounced upright, and everybody crowded around the doctor.

“All of you are family?”

“I’m her mother,” Millie said bluntly.

“I’m like... her older but gay sibling,” Blaine stuttered.

“I’m the pathetic boyfriend who can’t keep her safe,” Jake said bitterly.

“I’m... the older sister who antagonizes her at every turn,” Tina mumbled.

“I’m... the brother’s gay boyfriend and future husband,” Kurt muttered, and everybody stared at him.

“I’m her teacher/babysitter/one who let everybody get angry at her for fainting during a concert,” Will said.

“I’m her self-proclaimed vocal coach,” Mercedes tacked on. When Rachel gave her a look that meant she would be challenging her for that position later on, she added, “And Rachel Berry, you can pry that from my cold dead hands.”

“I’m the devil to anyone who antagonizes her,” Santana said, giving Tina an evil eye.

“I’m basically an older version of her,” Rachel said proudly. “And a... much meaner version,” she added on sheepishly after Santana and Kurt drilled her with a gaze that made her slightly shrink.

“I’m Sam.”

The doctor simply raised an eyebrow at all of them, before continuing. “I’m sorry.”

It stunned the entire group. “What?”

“This is extremely serious, I need to speak to just her mother. It’s confidential information.”

Blaine set his jaw. “Please just tell us.”

“Blaine...” Kurt said, laying a hand on his shoulder. “We should leave them be...”

“NO!” Blaine roared, shrugging it off aggressively, flinching away from Kurt. Kurt looked horrified at his reaction. Sam, too, was resolute.

“We want to know too.”

“I can’t. Close family only.”

“We are,” Sam argued back.

“Sam,” Will started, but Sam gave him a glare.

“I’m sorry.”

“Blaine, please-“ Kurt tried again.

“No,” Blaine said icily, glaring daggers at the doctor. “I let her down once. I’m not doing that again. If maybe I had opened my goddamn mouth when I saw her not eating, when I saw her getting thinner and thinner and everything happening to her. I should have done something even after Sectionals. I need to know.” Because I need to fix it, went unsaid in the air.

“I know,” Kurt soothed. “I wasn’t going to ask you to not hear it. I just wanted to ask you if you wanted to wash your hands first.”

Jake was absolutely having none of the doctor’s shit, stepping up in his space. “Let us know.”

“Jake!” Will shouted, pulling him back. “This is not the time for confrontation.”

“Marley could be dead!” Jake shouted back. “Mr. Schue, you saw the state she was in, both physically and mentally. I’m not letting her go.”

“Stop,” Santana said coldly. She stepped up, smoothing down her hoodie in the process. She was eerily calm, gaze locking onto the doctor, then at Marley’s mom. “It’s her choice, boys. You’re going to find out sooner or later anyways.” Then, to the doctor, “Just tell us if she’s alive.”

“She is,” the doctor confirmed.

“Let them hear it,” Millie said, taking pity on the boys who were in the room with Marley. Something had happened in that room, something big had happened and they were walking on eggshells around it.

“She’s alive. We have had to perform several blood transfusions. She sustained three broken ribs and a pneumothorax. The broken ribs had speared through her spleen and almost through her lung. It caused severe internal bleeding. The bullet wound barely missed her kidneys, luckily, but because of that, she has lost even more blood. Her jaw was cracked and swollen. She would need a neckbrace because her neck is too weak due to the bruising and swelling there. Her left wrist has a major compound fracture and was on the brink of getting infected, but we cleaned it out.”

Everybody’s heads were trying to process this information. “... okay.”

The doctor sighed. “That wasn’t my main concern, however. This part I do need to speak with her mother in private.”

“I’ll allow Blaine and Jake with me,” Millie said.

“... very well. Follow me.”

The three of them walked to another space farther away from the group, who were whispering nervously amongst themselves. Everybody was asking Sam and Will questions. Sam had completely shut down. Will was staring at the floor, giving vague answers and descriptions.

Tina and the other four were absolutely terrified of what happened inside that room, hearing Marley’s physical injuries.

“Marley is severely underweight. Her glucose level is also abnormally low. Does she suffer from acid reflux?”

“No...” All three of them answered in unison, before they blinked at each other confusedly. Marley had explicitly stated once before that she had no acid reflux in some biology class.

“She is severely malnourished. She weighs a little less than half of what she should be. This explains the brittleness of her bones. She’s also anemic and with the heavy damage sustained to her body, it’s too much for her. There’s not enough resources in her body to fix itself. Her body was close to using its protein stores, meaning that given another week or two, she would have died.”

“What are you saying?”

“We don’t know if she’ll make the night.”

Blaine was in... shock. “H-how? I mean... has anyone seen her eat? Anyone?”

Jake was staring at the doctor. “Tell me you’re joking.”

“I wish I am...” the doctor sighed. “Between the surgery, the blood transfusions, the IV, the drugs...” The doctor shook his head. “We’re not sure if her body is strong enough to pull through.”

“She has to. That’s not fair. That’s not fair!” Jake’s voice was rising, causing the other group’s heads to turn to them, faces filled with varying emotions.

“There were a couple of minor injuries as well, cuts and bruises. The last thing I want to tell you about are some of these cuts.” The doctor took a deep breath. “I know she has a graze from a bullet, but I found self-inflicted cuts around her thighs and shoulders.”

The world completely spun around the three of them. “We didn’t know this,” Blaine said, in utter shock, speaking up for all three of them.

“You have to help her, please,” Jake begged.

“We’re doing our best.” With that, he walked off quickly. Millie began to cry, as Blaine stared at the floor and Jake silently fumed at himself.

“Brittany,” Jake suddenly said. “I need to see what happened to her.”

“So do I,” Sam said, perking up at the mention of the blonde.

“Not until you explain what the fuck happened in there,” Santana snapped, as Rachel gave Millie a hug. Tina and Mercedes blocked their path. Kurt put a hand on Blaine’s shoulder, trying to draw him back to the present.

“Blaine? Do you want to wash your hands?”

“No.”

“No? Why not?” Kurt asked, trying to steer Blaine discreetly into the toilets.

“It’s her,” Blaine muttered. “It’s all I have left of her.”

“But she’s alive,” Santana protested.

“SHE COULD DIE!” Jake blurted out. Then, “... her body is weak… they don’t know if she’ll make the night.”

Silence.

The first one to break the silence was Tina’s sobs, fat tears rolling down her cheeks as she broke. 

“I should have told her I’m sorry I was such a bitch.”

Santana looked at Jake. “Tell me you’re joking.”

“I wish I was.”

Millie wailed, and Mercedes went over to give her a hug. Kurt stared at Blaine, finally the realization was clicking.

“I’m going to see Kitty,” Rachel said suddenly. When Jake opened his mouth to ask if he could come with, Rachel gave him a meaningful look. 

He quickly withdrew, as Rachel went down the hallways. Pausing only once to ask for Kitty Wilde’s room number, she knocked once and then let herself in.

She was alone.

It didn’t surprise Rachel as she sat by Kitty, who was staring out the window. She startled at seeing Rachel there.

“I’m dead right?”

“If you’re dead and you can see me, they probably screwed up where they wanna take you,” Rachel joked, and Kitty cracked a small smile. “How are you doing?”

“I’m… okay. How’s Marley? How’s the others?” Kitty asked. “Brittany? Is she okay?”

“No news from Brittany yet. The old people are coming back,” Rachel chuckled, before her face became sober. “Marley…”

Kitty’s face drained. “No.”

“Marley’s in a point where we don’t know if she’ll die or live.”

Rachel found Marley like Schrodinger’s cat, in a state of both living and death until they finally opened the box and found out. Kitty looked frail and weak, pale and gaunt. But she was clearly alive. However, Rachel wasn’t there to talk to Kitty about Marley, since the topic of Marley seemed to be a sore topic at the moment for all of them, so the alumni put her hand on Kitty’s. “But what about you? Don’t give me okay because you’re not okay.”

“I’m… managing,” Kitty admitted, staring beyond Rachel. She looked like she was still going to pass out at any point, prompting Rachel to nudge her slightly.

“Have you been eating?” Rachel asked quietly.

Kitty nodded. “Enough to get me through the day.”

Okay, so Kitty wasn’t totally starving herself. It still didn’t sit well with Rachel though.

“Why do you do that?” Rachel asked gently. Kitty’s hand looked like it was going to snap under pressure. Neither of them spoke for a moment, Kitty hesitating as she went over her answer as if contemplating whether to tell Rachel anything. However, they both knew that the truth was going to come out eventually.

Eventually, the others came in, Artie wheeling himself in.

“Quinn’s here. She wants to see you, Rachel.”

Rachel stood to meet Quinn, but Kitty snagged her hand.

“Don’t leave me.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Rachel soothed, but Kitty vehemently shook her head.

“Don’t.” She was tiny, small, afraid and Rachel’s heart broke. It was like looking at a little kid. 

“Artie? Do you think you can stay with her?” Rachel asked, and Artie wordlessly nodded, taking Kitty’s other hand in his as he came closer. He actively avoided Rachel’s eyes, wanting to ask her to stay but just could not.

She stepped out, releasing Kitty’s hand reluctantly and turned the corner to find Quinn restlessly pacing, with Santana trying to chill her out. It felt strange to see the Unholy Trinity without Brittany. Granted, at first she was the cheerleader you would never notice, but she was an integral part of the cheerleaders.

“How are they?” Quinn asked.

“Sad. Bad. Mad. Traumatized. Kitty didn’t want me to leave and I don’t think Artie wanted me to leave either,” Rachel admitted. “Blaine and Sam aren’t in a good way either, Jake’s wearing out the floor with his pacing. Tina’s confused and lost. Mr. Schue is… I don’t know what he is. He’s out of it, I guess.”

“Mike’s trying to calm Jake down. Finn and Puck said they’ll be around later tonight,” Quinn said. “The others aren’t quite fine either, they’re sitting with Millie Rose and are really, really quiet. But some of them won’t stop moving.”

“Can you tell them to hurry?” Rachel asked, softly. So soft that Quinn could have missed it. 

“They’re still dealing with papers-”

“Marley might not make the night.”

Quinn’s eyes widened, as she opened her mouth as if to ask her to repeat it again, before shutting it and looking away, pulling out her phone and calling Finn. Rachel could barely hear Finn’s voice on the other side.

_ “Hello-” _

“Finn, _Finn_ , you need to come home.” Quinn's voice was bordering on sobbing.

_ “What-? I’m still doing the papers, Quinn. I’m going as fast as I can to get back, but me and Puck we’re- no one is telling me anything, I can’t see what’s wrong. How bad is it, Quinn? Is-is everyone okay?” _

“How much did Santana tell you?” Quinn interrupted.

_“I- she didn’t tell me a lot, just that something happened…”_ Finn trailed off, hearing the empty shock in Quinn’s voice. _“Quinn, what happened?”_

“There was a school shooting.” Rachel could hear something shatter over the phone. 

_ “Quinn…” _

“Brittany and Marley got hurt. Kitty fainted.”

_“How bad? Why didn’t anyone tell me?”_ Finn asked, getting agitated. _“At least I know what to fill up-”_

“Finn, Marley might not make the night.”

There was complete silence, then suddenly there was a crashing noise.

_“DAMMIT!”_ he yelled. Quinn closed her eyes, opening them to mouth to Rachel, ‘he kicked over a chair’. _“I’m flying back first thing. They can’t stop me if someone’s dying, right?”_ He sounded desperate to appear, to be there. _“They can’t stop me, right? I still- I still haven’t thanked her for giving me the push to be here. What about the others? Jake? Ryder? Unique? Everybody? What about Brittany? How about her? How bad is it?”_ Finn was shooting out rapidly.

“Just come back, Finn,” Rachel spoke up, looking tiredly at Quinn. “They need you.”


	4. Chapter 4: Puck This Shit/Hidden In Blaine Sight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Glee club members accuse each other. The shock wears off into fear and a mess of other emotions. Finn and Puck return. Now that the original alumni are back together, they must find a way to sort through the traumas of the current Glee club, both past and present. It's kinda hard when one member is in a Schrodinger's Cat state and Finn and Will still haven't recovered from the feud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, um, be warned that everyone's going to be rather OOC. As someone mentioned, they are a bit out of character in this story because they are all so close. I did change some backstories a little... as Quinn would mention later, all of them have had some form of violence done against them, including the alumni. 
> 
> The reason why everyone's so close is because after the whole Glease musical, the alumni took a shine to the current members and kept in touch with them, visiting and helping them with Glee.

Blaine was screaming as everybody had to physically manhandle him to the toilet to wash off Marley’s blood. It made Kurt feel sick as he watched his ex-boyfriend fight tooth and nail to morbidly keep her blood. Sam had downright refused to help either, instead opting to stare into space as he waited for Brittany to be available for visiting. The other Glee members had returned, as well as their families, and it was with wide eyes as Kurt watched Cooper, Blaine’s dad, Joe, Mike, Mercedes as well as some other orderlies physically restrained Blaine. 

Mr. Schue was pacing, downright screaming at the phone. Coach Beiste, Sue, Becky and Miss Pillsbury had showed up at some point too, but had left at various times, mostly due to being unable to stomach Blaine’s screaming and the overwhelming despair that blanketed the Glee club members. All the time it took to wrangle Blaine to clean himself up was an hour as he screamed and struggled and pleaded.

But when it was all washed off, it was all gone. Blaine had no fight, no energy, practically sinking into the floor as soon as everybody let go of him, scaring the shit out of Kurt as Blaine bonelessly melted into one of the plastic chairs.

“Blaine?” Kurt whispered, as Blaine continued staring hard at his hands.

“Why?”

The question was hissed out, so broken and full of pain that Kurt had to double check that Blaine was actually speaking to him.

“Why did you do that?” Blaine spoke again, and his hands were shaking, opening and closing of their own accord as his body began to shake with sobs and his voice got caught in his tears. “Wh-why did you do that? I was so close! I- I- I was so close… you didn’t have to make me. I wanted to do it on my own. Let go on my own. I fought so hard this time- what did I do wrong?” Blaine’s whole body was trembling as he ran his hands through his hair and harshly tugging. “Where did I fail? What did I do? What did I not do?”

Kurt tentatively reached out to Blaine, who seemingly recoiled at his touch.

Thinking about it, all of the current Glee members were apprehensive around the alumni. They were wary, avoiding eye contact-- what had happened in that room? What happened beforehand? Kitty also seemed to be a sore topic.

“Blaine?” Kurt asked gently.

Jake stood abruptly, rounding on Tina. “This was your fault.”

“My fault?” Tina asked angrily. “And how is it my fault?”

“You pushed Marley to hate herself after Sectionals,” he seethed, getting into her face.

“Guys…” Unique started.

“You’re her boyfriend!” Tina snapped. “You should have known something was wrong with her!”

“You pushed her too far. God, you really are a bitch, aren’t you?”

“Calm down,” Mike said, but they continued yelling at each other.

“Maybe if you weren’t so busy ogling other girls you’d notice something wrong with her!”

“Maybe if you actually weren’t feeling so threatened by her you’d stop bullying her!”

“Stop it,” Ryder said quietly. Jake spun, too angry to register much.

“You fucking blamed Marley for being that stupid Katie. You knew, you fucking KNEW about her eating problems from before and you didn’t do jack shit about it!”

Ryder shoved Jake back. “Like what Tina said, you’re her boyfriend. And don’t call me out too, you knew it too and didn’t do shit about it.”

“Guys…” Unique said again, and Tina spat in her face.

“You didn’t even bother to help her, you catfishing freak, and you call yourself her best friend! Why? Afraid Ryder would never accept the truth that you’re Katie and not Marley?!”

Utter silence.

“WHAT?!” Ryder yelled, his anger losing focus on Jake. “Unique. You’re… you’re Katie?”

“What the fuck, Tina!” Unique yelled.

“Y- you knew…” Ryder pointed at Tina. “And you… you were the catfisher.” He pointed at Unique.

“Ryder…”

“Oh, ho, now I see how it is,” Ryder said bitterly, looking at all three of them. “You’re a lying ass bitch.” He pointed at Unique. “You’re a backstabbing pussy who’s afraid of what she did.” He pointed at Tina. “You’re a glorified man-whore who only wanted to get into Marley’s pants!” He pointed at Jake. “And you all… blame ME. For knowing, for not checking. What else is new!”

“I LOVE HER!” Jake screamed, getting into Ryder’s face.

“SO DO I!” Ryder yelled, pushing him back. “Did Marley know?” He addressed Unique.

“She didn’t…” Unique lied.

“Of course. Because you probably didn’t care. And if you did care, you didn’t trust her.”

“Fine! I told her,” Unique shouted. “I told her. I told her just before the shooting. She told me to tell you but I couldn’t… I couldn’t… I’m sorry.”

Ryder should probably feel bad, since he was using Marley as leverage to find out the truth. But everybody had been lying to him. And Tina knew for some reason? Everything was confusing and he was just really, really angry.

“Was I seriously not a good enough friend for you? That… that you needed to catfish me? And Tina! You and Artie had it out for Marley since she arrived- why? What the hell? Why the fuck did you do that-?”

Blaine growled, springing to his feet and almost pulling out his hair, before suddenly crumpling to his knees, curling into a ball on the floor, and screaming. Screaming until his throat grew hoarse. His hands were clapped over his ears and clenched tightly, as if trying to rip out his own ears.

All the arguments stopped as soon as Blaine hit the floor.

“Blaine!” Kurt shouted, rushing over to his side. Blaine kept screaming, screaming. Sam flinched at the sound, drawing back into reality, withdrawing, withdrawing to the point where he was squishing himself against his chair. Ryder backed up immediately, all anger gone, arms around himself as he trembled. He backed into the corner of the room and sank to the floor, making himself as small as possible. Jake had turned pale, moving restlessly around, wringing his hands. Sugar immediately cowered, avoiding other people except the other Glee club members. Joe dropped to his knees, chanting a prayer and whimpering. Unique jumped back, eyes darting back and forth wildly. Even Will jerked back, raising his hands as if expecting a fight.

Rachel, Quinn, Mercedes and Santana ran out from where they were discussing something.

“What’s going on?!” Santana demanded, and her eyes fell on the scene. “... oh…”

“He won’t calm down!” Kurt said, frazzled. “None of them can!”

Quinn sized up the situation. “We need them to know that they are safe. Right now, none of them are in that mindset.”

Kurt crouched next to Blaine who was screaming his voice raw. Careful to avoid touching him, he panicked on what to do, singing Blaine’s version of Teenage Dreams to him, hoping that if the voices couldn’t get through, maybe singing could. Everybody else split up to try to calm everybody else down.

Meanwhile, far, far away, Finn and Puck were throwing clothes at each other, trying to finish packing. Upon hearing that someone could possibly be dying, he and Puck had completely thrown themselves into packing and explaining. He couldn’t leave because he had no clear picture, but once he did, he could see why they were so scared.

A school shooting! It was something that he had hoped would never happen. 

They must be scared. They were scared. Hell, even he was scared. The students must be traumatized.

“Is my little brother okay?” Puck asked.

“I don’t know… but they said that Marley… Marley might not make the night.” Finn gritted his teeth, jamming his luggage shut. The school can revoke his grades. He was going back to help, and no one was going to stop him.

“She was the one who convinced you to come here right?”

“Yeah,” Finn muttered angrily. He had kicked over a chair. “And Brittany was… and Kitty… I wasn’t there for them. But now I will be.”

He set his jaw straight then relaxed his shoulders. “I’m glad everybody else is safe.”

“Mr. Schue must be having a hard time,” Puck remarked, careful not to say anything that would incur Finn’s wrath. At this point, he wasn’t sure if even mentioning Rachel was a good idea, knowing how terrified Finn was about going over to New York and just beating the crap out of her escort boyfriend.

Finn snorted, putting on a leather jacket. Puck knew that Finn was acting extremely weird ever since he had come into college. The feud, the kiss, Finn had said it all to Puck, and had partied so hard in college that made even Puck look tame. That said a lot. None of this was Finn. Thankfully, Finn didn’t say anything scathing: Puck was sure he would shout at Finn if he said something. He mused to himself how the tables had turned. Finn was usually the one who would try to calm him down and make him see reason. Now Finn was the one who was acting weird.

“Yeah.” Finn was standing straighter now, looking at Puck. “We have to go now.”

“I wonder how everybody else is doing,” Puck said carefully, testing the waters yet again. This was being stupid, he shouldn’t have to walk on eggshells around Finn. But Christ, if Finn got mad he had a mean right hook. He really didn’t feel like antagonizing Finn at the moment. His brother seemed like a safe topic, plus he was itching to find out whether Jake was okay, despite Finn not quite knowing. He was scared and terrified and he could go on a frustrated rage and rant about safety and be the one doing stupid shit. But Finn seemed to be on his last tether as well.

Finn softened a little, just a little. “I just hope they’re okay.”

They made their way out of the college, Finn quietly explaining the situation to the dean and they were both on the flight back to Lima, Ohio. Santana had left them an address to drop their luggage at, and they followed quietly without preamble as their flight landed. They were half-expecting everyone to be at the hospital, but they were surprised when Mike greeted them at the door, followed by… Rachel?

“Hey,” Rachel said quietly, eyes red as if she had finished crying. Finn and Rachel stared at each other for a moment, as Mike looked between them, before raising a hand to pull Puck inside and assist him with his bags.

“Hey,” Finn said, looking her over a moment, as if to check if it was really her. “Listen, about Brody, I-”

“Come in,” Rachel interrupted, stepping to the side to allow him in. He hesitated, but at another glance, he reluctantly stepped inside as Rachel closed the door behind him and quickly made her way over to the kitchen as he deposited his backpack and luggage by the sofas. He could hear the clinking of cutleries in the kitchen as Rachel prepared something.

Mike and Puck wandered back downstairs, the dancer giving a stiff nod to Finn and patting his shoulder.

“Welcome back, man…” Mike said softly. “Think you can help Rachel with the snacks for everybody else?”

“I don’t know what everybody wants though,” Finn responded, so Mike handed him a list of everyone’s requests and what their allergies, food preferences were. His stomach lurched when beside Kitty and Marley’s names were blanks.

“We rented a van,” Mike said. “Or, more of Santana rented it.”

“Where is she? How’s Brittany?”

“Brittany had suffered major blood loss, she needs a transfusion.” Mike was looking at the space behind Finn. “Santana and Sam brute forced their way in… thanks to them, we know she’s going to be okay.” 

Finn took a glance at the kitchen, where Rachel was handing Puck a pack of food. They were talking to each other, and judging by the way Puck’s shoulders relaxed slightly, it was about his brother being okay.

“How’s everyone? How… how’s Mr. Schue doing?”

“He’s in shock,” Mike sighed. “Everyone is. He’s been shouting at Principal Figgins the whole time, but it’s not like he can do anything to help… like that would magically make everything better. When he heard you were coming, he sort of closed off.”

Finn glanced back at Rachel. “What about Kitty?”  _ He refuses to ask about Marley yet. _

“She’ll be okay too… she could have the same eating disorder as Marley.”

“Grilled cheesus…” Finn breathed, eyes closing. “No wonder her food preferences were blank.”

Mike patted his shoulder, as Rachel called for Finn, prompting him to go towards her.

“We can’t quite drag everyone out of the hospital at the moment…” Rachel started, facing away from him. “So I thought it would be good if we brought food to them.”

“Is it… all vegan?” Finn asked, peering over her shoulder at the counter. Rachel let out a short, sharp laugh.

“For the benefit of everybody, and despite my very, very strong reservations on it… only mine has a vegetarian option.”

“Vegetarian? So… no more vegan?” Finn joked, and Rachel laughed again, turning to fully face him.

“Not for you. Come on, help me out here.”

They both worked in relative silence, the work being split evenly between them as Finn packed the food away and Rachel cleaned up the rest of their messes, flipping the lights off. He lingered by the van as Mike revved up the engine in relative silence, helping Rachel put all the food in the vehicle.

“Rachel-”

Rachel simply walked past him, sitting shotgun with Mike as Puck sat at the backseat, strumming his guitar. He seated himself close to the front. Mike caught his eyes, then refocused on the road as he pulled out of the garage.

The stony silence seemed to weigh on everyone the entire ride, as they pulled into the hospital parking lot, greeted by Quinn and Mercedes. Rachel gave them both a hug, whispering in low tones to them.

“How are they?” Rachel asked.

“They gave us a separate room to wait in. We’ll show you the way. Santana would be here, but… they allowed us to see Brittany now. She and Sam brought hell on earth to see her.” Quinn pursed her lips. “Kitty’s coming out in a couple of days. They shifted her into Brittany’s room. We’ve been going in and out in batches.”

“Is Mar- no. Is anybody hungry?” Rachel asked, as Quinn eyed the packages Finn, Puck and Mike had in hand. Mercedes had sort of blanched at that.

“Maybe later,” Mercedes said softly. Quinn set her jaw and looked away. “Some of them keep throwing up-”

“What?” Finn interrupted. Mercedes’ jaw clicked shut as she audibly gulped.

“- not like that Finn. It’s the nerves. They saw some horrifying shit.” Mercedes explained. “It would make sense why some of them wouldn’t want to eat.”

Quinn nodded to the entrance.

“Wait- what are we supposed to expect?” Puck asked, snagging Quinn’s hand for a moment. Their eyes looked down at the contact, then they met again. 

“Yeah… I-I think we should know,” Finn added.

Mike looked away for a moment, taking the other package from Puck, and muttering something about meeting them inside, scurrying away. Rachel wrapped her arms around herself, shivering at the cold winds. Mercedes looked between them, taking the other package from Finn and making a quick escape as Quinn’s mouth opened and closed as if she wanted to explain everything to them.

Puck let go of Quinn’s hand as she frowned at the ground.

“Maybe crying? Careful not to shout, or make any loud and sudden noise. Don’t argue- that sets Blaine off. Avoid total silence if you can help it, that just makes it easier for them to get startled at sounds. Don’t bring up eating disorders, vomiting, Sectionals or anything of the sort. Don’t blame anybody, even yourself. That will set off a wave of arguments and shouting and chaos. Ask them before you touch them- that goes for Ryder especially. Most of them have had some form of violence done against them at some point, so don’t… don’t say anything about it. The incident is probably going to bring up past traumas. What are their individual triggers… so shouting angrily and arguments sets Blaine off, unexpected touch for Ryder, Sam’s is calling him a slut or bringing up that he was homeless. There’s a lot more though but these are the ones that spring into mind and the ones you need to crucially avoid.”

“Don’t forget about the one with Marley,” Rachel added.

“Oh…” Quinn swallowed hard. “Yeah, that. Don’t… bring up Marley. At all.”

“That’s ridiculous. Why wouldn’t we bring her up?” Puck asked. 

“They got into an explosive argument about her that deescalated into a lot of their troubles and set everybody off. When we tried to calm them down, we found out the triggers for Ryder and Sam. It became a huge mess. It’s easier to not bring her up in front of them.”

“But we should-”

“Trust me, you don’t want that,” Quinn snapped, before softening. “I just don’t know what to do.”

Puck exhaled, going back to the van and grabbing his guitar. He slung it across his shoulders.

“I have an idea.”

“Are we going to sing to them?” Quinn asked skeptically, but Puck shrugged.

“Music makes everything better right? And- and… you did say no total silence.”

“He may have a point, Quinn.” Rachel spoke up now. “And, it could help.”

Finn was expecting loud crying, was expecting desperate wails like in those war movies he saw. But he was greeted by a sort of silence he’d only heard once, with his father’s death. Where even with the low buzz of conversation, there was a heavy muted silence that hung in the air above them all. Only Santana and Sam were absent from the glee-club assigned waiting room. 

Will was there, looking like he had seen a ghost when Finn walked in. His mouth opened, as if to say something, but Finn brushed him off, opting to go over to his step-brother who was hugging Blaine as if he would disappear. Blaine’s arms were scrubbed raw. 

“Hey..” Finn whispered, careful to keep his voice down.

“Finn,” Kurt said, in relief, nudging Blaine who was curled against Kurt. “Hey… Finn’s here.”

Blaine curled closer to Kurt, gripping onto him tighter. Finn wasn’t sure if he’d seen Blaine this insecure before, scared. Everyone seemed to have a haunted expression, with various nervous tics that gave away their fear. Puck immediately went to his brother, giving him a huge hug.

“Thank God you’re okay…” Puck breathed, as Jake practically threw his arms around the older Puckerman, before suddenly sobbing.

“I thought I wouldn’t see you again, bro.” Jake clutched tighter onto Puck’s jacket. “I thought I wouldn’t get to have a relationship with my brother.”

Cooper, at this point, looked over at Blaine, which Kurt caught.

_ Not now,  _ Kurt mouthed.  _ Later. When it’s all over. _

Would it, though?

“Wh-what are we doing now?” Finn asked.

“We’re waiting for more news on…” Kurt abruptly paused. “You know.”

“Marley?” Finn asked, as Quinn suddenly fixed him with a deadly gaze for saying that.

Kurt’s mouth hung open as he said that, staring at Finn as if he decapitated someone. “... yes.”

Jake let out a louder sob at that, pulling away abruptly from Puck and stumbling to the door. Mike got up to follow him out. Quinn was staring daggers at him.

Rachel also looked like she wanted to slap him at the moment.

Blaine stiffened. The rest flinched.

But nothing happened, so the alumni relaxed, with Puck retrieving his guitar and sitting by Artie and Tina. Ryder was stood away from everyone, glaring holes into the floor.

“Hey man, you alright?” Finn asked, reaching out for Ryder, but paused when he flinched and when Rachel abruptly jerked his hand down.

“Don’t,” Rachel hissed.

“Yeah man, fine,” Ryder seethed, but left it at that.

It felt like a bottle of cola that was shaken, and ready to explode, the tension. Finn was pretty sure another mention of Marley’s name would be the mentos to the cola.

Leave it up to Mr. Schue to hand him that mentos.

“Finn… I’m so glad you’re here, and back. And I’m so sorry for my behaviour earlier-”

“Don’t,” Finn snapped. “I don’t need to hear it.”

“Finn, I-I realized there are only so many days, and I was still stinging from the wedding and just hearing that you kissed Emma-”

“No.” Finn stood up now, facing Mr. Schue. “Some things you can’t come back from. Alright? What the hell do you expect from me, we did that stupid feud. It’s over.”

“We need you.”

“No you most certainly don’t,” Finn snarled, and he could barely register Rachel grabbing onto his leather jacket, trying to calm him down. 

“Please,” Will appealed. “I’m trying my best by them-”

Finn scoffed. “Tell that to Marley.”

Will’s jaw clicked shut abruptly. Quinn looked like she wanted to march over and cuff Finn by the ears and drag him out. Rachel froze as Finn’s fists clenched.

“Neither are you,” Will snapped back, but he could see the hurt and guilt rising in those eyes.

“Well, we all failed her, alright?” Ryder said angrily from his corner. “Enough.”

“Says the guy who went around accusing everyone of catfishing him despite everyone telling him no,” Tina said, and Ryder’s expression darkened, stepping up to her. “You especially blamed her for that one.”

“I did not!”

And just like that, voices were rising, the anger in the room reaching a boiling point as they blamed each other, shouting, arguing. Finn understood why they had a separate room- they were loud- and he understood why Quinn told him not to bring up Marley.

Just like that, everyone was shouting at each other for past mistakes, past traumas, with the alumni trying to break up the fight.

“You bitch!”

“Fucking whore!”

He could barely register Blaine sobbing, his hoarse screaming getting louder and louder, despite it being muffled in Kurt’s jacket. 

“Tell them to stop,” Kurt whispered to Rachel. “Or else Blaine will set them off again.”

“Finn- Mr. Schue, I think you both need to calm down and perhaps talk about this later-”

“No, Rachel, we have to settle this,” Will said stubbornly.

“Mr. Schue, please be reasonable- we’re in the midst of some troubling times and I know that another argument will not succeed in accomplishing anything. Finn, why don’t you drop it?”

“No.” Finn shook Rachel off his arm with enough force to send her stumbling back into Quinn, forcing them both onto the floor, staring at him in shock.

When they both fell, it stunned the other members into silence. Finn, quickly realizing his mistake, turned right around to try and help Rachel and Quinn up. “Shit, sorry, I didn’t mean-”

It was aggressive behaviour that set all of them off, plus the fact that Blaine was screaming and it was registering in their heads.

The room fell into utter pandemonium, as the doctor stepped back in with Mike and Jake in tow, both looking like they saw a ghost. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quinn: Don't bring up Marley.  
> Finn: Okay.
> 
> Later.
> 
> Kurt: *speaking about how everyone is doing*  
> Finn: Marley?  
> Quinn: Am I a joke to you?
> 
> Okay, I kinda found that funny. I don't know why- I just did. It's supposed to be serious dammit! Also, next chapter is more on Santana, Sam, Britt and Kitty (with special guest appearances with Quinn, Rachel and Artie and more.)
> 
> Edit: I wrote Cory's name somewhere along here earlier. RIP Cory Monteith. You were the heart and soul of Glee.


	5. Chapter 5: Smythe To Meet You/Going Wilde

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Inside Brittany's room, Brittany explains a bit of what happened to her. Sam tells Santana a bit of what happened in the room. Kitty develops complications. Marley's fate is discovered. The New Directions argue again, only to receive a visitor from another place- whether they are unwanted or not remains to be seen. They do, however, offer a helping hand and inadvertently put things into perspective.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's-a right folks! Sebastian Smythe has now entered the picture! And he's not a dick! He's coming in repenting. Yay Britt returns! Santana the mother hen and master plotter! More sad! More sad! And you get an issue, and you get an issue, and everybody gets an issue! Marley's here! Cool! Also, not all medical information here is too accurate, even though I googled most of it, so take all medical information with a grain of salt.

Santana practically flung herself onto Brittany as soon as she saw her. “Oh my god, Britt!”

“Hey, San… Sam...” Brittany smiled at her as if she was the sun and the stars and that she hung the motherfucking moon in the sky. They both ran over, looking awkwardly at each other, then at Brittany.

“Y-you go first…”

“N-no, you do.”

Sam opened his mouth as if to tell Santana, but Brittany looking as pale as heck prompted them both to move closer, both each taking a hand.

“Thank God… you’re okay, Britt. You’re okay.” Santana resisted the urge to brush Brittany’s hair out of her eyes, instead tightening her grip on Brittany’s hand. “Why were you out there?”

“I was trying to find Marley. She walked out really fast and I thought she needed help, but then I got lost in the crowd and…” Brittany trailed off. “Then people were screaming. I ran in a direction. I couldn’t come back.”

Brittany’s eyes went glassy, as a shudder ran through her body. “It was horrible, San. It hurt so bad. Then Jake came and he was so sad and guilty. So I told him not to blame himself.”

Sam met Santana’s eyes, shrinking back at the sudden intensity in her gaze. “Who the fuck are these shooters? I want to make them fucking pay for all the damage they have done.”

“Santana,” Sam protested, almost weakly, but once Santana had the ball rolling, it wouldn’t fucking stop.

“I’m going to make sure their fucking asses are in jail for a long ass fucking time-”

“San,” Brittany interrupted. “What happened? Why are you here?”

Santana stopped seeing red for a moment, shifting her gaze to Sam, who was staring at the floor.

“I don’t wanna talk about it…”

“You’re all walking on eggshells. You think the others won’t notice that you argue over Marley till Q-ball makes it a rule not to bring her up? What the hell happened in there?” Santana snapped.

“San, I don’t think he wants to talk about it-”

“They  _ targeted  _ Marley, okay?!” Sam almost shouted in frustration. “They went for Kitty, saying that she was the one who made everyone’s life a burden, but Marley stepped up and said it was her instead! Then they beat Marley and said that we were the ones to push her to that point… that it was our fault. Then they shot her. The worst part was that it was all true. We weren’t there for her. We brushed her off. We brushed off everyone’s problems. And now- Marley’s paying the price. So go ahead, Santana, shout at us all you want because after you left…  _ we didn’t care. _ ”

Sam’s hands flew up to bunch into his hair, tugging harshly. Santana immediately reached out, coaxing him to let go of his hair lest he goes bald.

“I’m not shouting at anyone,” Santana said calmly, despite every single fibre in her body absolutely screaming at her to snap again. Sam was downright terrified, and her time in the Glee club had mellowed her out a little. Besides, she wasn’t the one put in the high stress situation, Sam and Britt were. “Sam, let go. Sam. Sam! Trouty mouth!”

The mocking nickname was astonishingly what calmed Sam down, allowing Brittany to intertwine their fingers. Santana pointedly refused to look at it, instead looking back at Brittany, who looked shocked, but not surprised at what happened. Brittany had always been the observant one, but never the one to take action, not really. Sam had a poorly hidden surprised reaction when Brittany mentioned going after Marley before the school shooting started. Santana was proud of her girl though for noticing. Sam relaxed, but they sat in relative silence for an hour, Brittany slipping into a soft sleep.

That was when Kitty was moved into the room, followed closely by Artie. The nurses quietly settled Kitty in the bed next to Brittany, and left. She was knocked out cold, with Artie still holding onto her hand.

“What happened to mini Q-ball?” Santana asked.

“She had a nightmare… passed out. The nurses had to sedate her,” Artie explained, fidgeting with his wheelchair. 

Santana stared at Kitty, so sound asleep. She had a feeling no one would be sleeping anytime soon, not without some sedatives.

Poor Sam looked ragged. He was really, really tired. 

“Did you call your parents? Tell them you’re okay?” Santana asked softly, careful not to wake Brittany.

“I did. They just… were so happy I’m okay.” Sam closed his eyes, as Santana looked at the clock, carefully looking at the time, drawing closer to midnight.

“Did the others manage to reach their parents?”

“Yeah. You saw Blaine’s family out there earlier, most of their parents are here, but they can’t exactly bring their children home… we just feel safer together, y’know?”

There was a knock on the door, followed by Rachel poking her head in.

“Hey… me and Mike are going to go out and get food… what do you guys want?”

“Nothing,” Sam said blankly.

“Sam,” Rachel chastised. “Let me rephrase. What do you like to eat?”

“Nothing.”

“Trouty mouth,” Santana warned.

Sam looked to the side and huffed, closing his eyes in frustration. “Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Or just mac and cheese.”

Rachel nodded, gesturing at Artie and Santana. “What do you both want?”

“A PB and J sandwich.”

“Mac and cheese.”

Rachel opened the door further, making a note on a piece of paper. She looked at Brittany and Kitty.

“What about both of them?”

“Britt likes liver spread,” both Sam and Santana answered at the same time, prompting Rachel to look between them and raise an eyebrow.

“Okay then…” Rachel said, noting it down. “And Kitty?”

All of them shrugged, prompting Rachel to lower her paper. “No one knows what Kitty or M- what  _ they _ like to eat.”

“Would they even want to eat?” Santana asked. “Could Mini You even-” Santana shut her mouth quickly.

Rachel winced. “Let’s not think about that.”

“When’s Finn coming?” Sam asked, as Rachel flinched.

“Soon.”

“Here comes Mr. Proposal Boy,” Santana said lowly.

“Santana, stop with the crass nicknames,” Rachel huffed. “And don’t think you’re any better, Ms. I Dated Karofsky As A Beard.”

Santana swatted at her and scowled back, then sighed. “No. I’m not.”

Rachel, a bit surprised at how easily Santana folded under her teasing, frowned. Normally she’d gloat about how she got Santana to shut up, but after the events, she was more concerned. 

The room was thick with silence as Rachel left with more assurances she would be back, after sensing the panic within Sam and Artie. Artie had his jaw set, blanking out occasionally and blinking himself forcefully back to reality. Artie continued holding onto Brittany, as if she was going to disappear any second. Santana scowled at the nurses that came in, even sending one running out with a sharp glare and a scowl.

Oh, sure there was a steady sound of the heart monitors of both Brittany and Kitty, falling out of sync in irregular times but was an oddly calming arpeggio, especially when, Santana noted, that had Brittany lost any more blood before Jake found her, or had Marley not stepped up for Kitty, in place of the heartbeats would be silence, and all of them would be staring at grey walls of the morgue than the cheerful pastels of the hospital.

Well- if Marley didn’t make it, they’d still be staring at the walls of the morgue. Santana sucked in a breath at that. There were a lot of people dead- but the most impact the shooters had happened in that little choir room, using their guilt against them. No, they didn’t have to kill all of them to leave an impact. Just hurt the vulnerability. Santana learned that from Sue in the first year she joined the New Directions. At that point they were all still so little and immature, it was easy to drive them apart.

Everyone had a weakness. Every group had that vulnerability that if you struck hard enough, would send them shattering to the ground. No matter how well-hidden it was, there was always one. Vocal Adrenaline had their hubris. The Warblers had their ambitions- that was their ultimate downfall, what with the drugs. The New Directions had many, many glaring weaknesses. Their distance, the animosity, the jealousy. It was made laughably easier when it was all pinned on one person: Marley.

The kicker? All of it was inadvertent. Unintentionally taken too far.

Sure, the Glee club had done this before. But it was all spread out and if it had been targeted straight at somebody, well, it never went to the extent of life and death. There were consequences, but they didn’t- they never faced this sort of payment. A sort of moral dilemma, as you will. 

In the bigger picture… was it worth it?

If no one bullied Marley, then the shooters wouldn’t have had a pinned target. They would have shot everybody in that room. Santana wouldn’t know everybody was dead until days later. She’d lose what stirred her to come to New York in the first place. She’d lose a family-  _ another one-  _ she noted grimly, and even if she didn’t like Mr. Schue or Kitty that much, she would never ask this on them.

Plus, Marley was sweet, a real contrast from the drama that surrounded the usual Glee club members. 

She was broken out of her thoughts by Kitty stirring, and Brittany’s heart monitor speeding up, her nose scrunching up as she shook her head.

“Britt?” Santana asked, taking her hand as Brittany whimpered, looking terrified, tears streaking down her face. Sam squeezed her hand.

She was whispering, lips moving but no sound coming out. Santana wanted to shake her awake, but she had a feeling that it wouldn’t help. In fact, she had a feeling that it would terrify her further, instead opting to use a gentle touch along Brittany’s arm, trying to stir her back into reality. Kitty’s eyes fluttered open first, before they widened as she sat up abruptly, startling poor Artie. She let out a low groan as the room spun around her and went wavy, her head becoming light.

“Dammit…” Kitty muttered, bringing up a hand to her head. Artie came closer, looking worriedly at her. 

“You okay? It’s a headrush, isn’t it?” Artie asked, trying to grab her hand again, but she flinched away from him, before realizing he was alright.

“Y-yeah…” Kitty blinked. “W-what…” She shivered. It was freezing. The room wouldn’t stop spinning around her. She closed her eyes and felt the urge to lie back down and sleep, but she felt Artie shaking her. Brittany’s whimpers were turning into sobs, Santana just short of slapping Brittany to get her awake, noticing Kitty sitting upright and then… “I can’t feel my legs.”

“What?” Artie asked, looking worried. Santana couldn’t help but feel bad for him, watching his reality become someone else’s, even just for a short while.

She was clutching at her chest, breaths coming in short gasps. She could feel tingling in her limbs, and her eyelids felt heavy, like she couldn’t lift them anymore. There was a short stabbing pain in her chest, and breaths were hard to come by.

“... pain…” she wheezed, other hand clutching at the sheets. “... pain…”

Brittany was thrashing now. Santana looked desperately at Kitty and Artie, Sam trying really hard to wake up Brittany.

“Britt, wake up!”

“Call the nurse, call the nurse  _ now, _ ” Santana snapped, looking between both of them, before reaching forward to Kitty. “You’re okay. You’re okay. Sam, get Brittany awake now.”

“I’m trying!” Sam almost sobbed, reaching out to cup Brittany’s face. “C’mon Britt, it’s Sam. Can you hear me? It’s Sam. It’s me.”

Brittany sobbed, eyes flying open as she looked wildly around, eyes landing on Sam. “Sam.”

She threw herself at him, crying into her shoulder. Santana practically smashed the Call Nurse button in both jealousy (Santana? Jealous? No she wasn’t. Totally not jealous. At all.) and worry for Kitty who was gasping for air.

“What’s… happening?” Kitty asked, then she looked confused. “Where am I?”

“Dammit! Focus, Kitty!” Santana almost screamed, gripping onto Kitty, trying not to squeeze because Kitty almost felt fragile in her hands. 

She seemed so confused, focusing on Santana’s hand. “Is that bad?”

“What the-“ Santana resisted the urge to smack someone, anyone. “Of course it’s bad!”

“Santana,” Artie warned.

She huffed out a breath. Right. Not to get too worked up. Thankfully, the nurses arrived, pulling Santana away from Kitty as they tried to suss out what was wrong. They didn’t quite like what they saw, because they forced Artie to back away, with him watching in horror. They pulled the curtains to cover their view, and Santana sat with Artie, Sam and Brittany. At least, until Artie wheeled himself out when Quinn came in, looking quizzically at the curtain, then at Artie who was deathly silent.

“What happened?”

Santana shrugged, staring emptily at Brittany.

“... I don’t know.” 

“Hi Quinn,” Brittany mumbled, staring at the floor, eyes red from crying. “You’re here.”

“Hey,” Quinn greeted. “How are you feeling?”

“Like when Lord Tubbington declared war on the entirety of humanity- more than awful.” Brittany sighed, looking away tiredly. “Scared.”

Santana wasn’t quite sure what to say to that. Brittany was scared- she was never really scared. Even when they broke up, she had been more sad. 

Quinn crouched next to Brittany, slowly reaching for her. When Brittany didn’t react, she gently placed a hand on her arm, drawing her attention to Quinn. 

“You’re okay.” Quinn shook her even more. “You’re okay.”

“Did they even catch them?” Brittany asked. “The people who attacked us?”

“... no. Not that I know of,” Santana answered, catching the way they seemed to shrink in on themselves and look fearfully around. Quinn looked at her phone, watching it ping with a message from Rachel.

“I’m going to go warn Finn and Puck about what not to do,” Quinn said, standing up. “Do you want to come with?”

“No,” Santana said bluntly, eyes now focused on the curtain. “It’s fine. It’s fine.”

“Santana-”

“I’ll stay with Britt and Sam and Kitty,” Santana answered, waving her off. “I’ll bring news of Kitty. Hopefully she’ll be out in a couple of days.”  _ Lies. Pure lies. _

Quinn looked hesitant, but pulled away. “Okay.” She hesitated for a moment at the doorway. “Santana?”

“What, Q-ball?”

Quinn looked between her and Brittany and Sam, before her eyes rested on Brittany and Sam’s joined hands. Her eyes softened as she looked back at Brittany. “Nothing. Nevermind. It’s… it’s nothing.”

Here was a little bit of information. Did you know that anorexia brought about other complications? Santana didn’t. No, she had followed Sue’s crazy diet before realizing and knowing it wasn’t for her. Brittany hadn’t even known there was a crazy diet, plus Brittany was too confident in her own body and knew what she needed to stay in shape without adhering to Sue’s orders. Santana’s own cynicism saved her from going down this path. She had seen other cheerleaders go down this path, but never  _ this bad.  _ At the very most was Mercedes in the first year of Glee and Quinn-- though Quinn had quickly realized following the diet was a dangerous idea when one was pregnant. 

It seemed like a no-brainer fact, considering that starving  _ was  _ a way to die. But it was easy to forget that people with EDs, the goal wasn’t to die (though later on, as Santana learned more about the events leading up to this, that it might have been Marley’s hope of escape, that if she died, she died) it was a way of control over their lives. In reality, it was a desperate grab at nonexistent reins, when inside your body it raged, it hungered, it  _ starved. _

It might have started as pressure for some Cheerios, Santana realized, but then they became too insecure, too dependent on the diet. Who knows about their background? Maybe they found comfort in even a bit of control, over what they ate. 

Inside, Santana was screaming. She should have known- she had been there. She and Quinn almost pushed Rachel over that edge themselves. She saw when Quinn started getting restless, pacing, bringing up the scale, shifting uncomfortably around food. She saw when Mercedes collapsed and fainted because of that stupid diet. Thank God Quinn was around to talk her out of it. She supposed she was complicit in it, considering how she was encouraging it in the first place.

She knew it was torturous, but she didn’t think that it would be harmful.

So when the nurse asked to talk to her, Santana nodded and only listened to the nurse, not with a single smartassed remark.

Kitty had acute kidney injury, they assumed it was from an overdose of painkillers or the electrolyte imbalance in her body. Santana had nodded, taken it in stride, but hunkered down on a chair next to Brittany and Sam searching and Googling what the nurse said after she left and Kitty was put on a special drip and maybe a dialysis for a few days. She looked peaceful now, sleeping, but if it wasn’t for the heart rate monitor showing irregular beats that she was alive, Santana would have slapped her, shook her, screamed at her till she was awake because she looked like she was dead.

She turned it over and over in her head, looking up the complications of anorexia, of bulimia, of electrolyte imbalances, with Sam and Brittany reading over her shoulder and occasionally making small conversation.

But they were all terrified.

“You should tell them,” Sam insisted, pointing at the door. Santana hesitated, wondering if she should before resolving herself. The others wouldn’t be happy if she hid it- she was just dreading their reactions.

Mentally she wanted to kick herself and scream and turn back time and wish that she had done  _ more.  _

But again- if Marley hadn’t had that low self esteem burst of confidence to speak up, she was pretty sure she would still be in New York none the wiser, only to wake up that some of the people she really cared about were dead, not just Marley.

But it wasn’t quite fair now, was it? Why did she have to pay the price? She always knew Marley carried a sort of heaviness within her, a burden that Rachel had confessed to Santana after a conversation with Marley, that made her pity her. The world had a tragic way of showing lessons- poor girl needed a break. 

As far as Santana knew, Marley’s mom was the only person in her life. Her dad bailed on her, but for unknown reasons, Marley had said. She refused to open up more about it, which was fine with Santana, she could tell it was a really, really touchy subject. Her last school was ‘bad’ but yet again, Santana knew there was more to the school than just ‘bad’. 

She was ready to punt the bullies into space because she just  _ knows  _ that Marley wouldn’t just switch schools just because it was ‘bad’. Bad could mean a lot of things. Bad teachers? Bad environment? Bad students? Bad attitude? Santana knew one of the most extreme things one could do was transfer schools. Again, Kurt’s done it before- when he went to Dalton Academy because he was being bullied by Karofsky. Blaine had mentioned transferring schools to Dalton because he was bullied for being gay.

None of this was fair. Maybe that was why the Glee club existed. It gave people like them a family and a place to exist in and just… be. She patted Brittany’s arm and told Sam she would be back.

Stepping into the Glee club assigned waiting room, she wasn’t expecting heated arguing, a poor doctor in the middle of the shouting match, Mike and Jake looking pale. Jake in particular had a mad tic in his eye, watching everyone argue. Artie was the only one who had completely clammed up, silent throughout the whole ordeal since he left the room.

“What the fuck is going on?!” Santana snapped. 

“Let go of me you bitch!” Unique screamed, throwing Tina off of her. Kurt had taken Blaine out of the room due to the ensuing violence. Rachel, Quinn and Mercedes leapt forward to hold Tina back, Finn, Puck and Mike holding Unique back as the screaming intensified.

Enter Sebastian Smythe, walking in. His face was pale, he was gripping the edge of the doorway as his presence signalled the end of the brawl.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Santana scowled at him. “Here to make fun?”

Sebastian ignored her for the most part, eyes raking around the room to see mostly everyone there.

“Where’s Blaine?” he demanded. “Where’s the… where’s the girl that fainted during Sectionals? Where’s the dancing girl that got retained? Where’s that one annoying cheerleader?”

“Wow, Sir Slush-A-Lot, you remembered they exist. Congratulations. Well done,” Santana said sarcastically.

“Yeah, thanks. Tell me- where are they? Are they okay?” Sebastian pressed. Everyone looked down. “Hang on- why the hell are you guys fighting?”

The boys released Unique. “Why are you here?”

Sebastian focused on her. “Because I know who did it. I had to come here when they said that they bragged about teaching you guys a lesson. You may be my rivals but-“ Sebastian deflated slightly, hunching over a little, showing how defeated he was. “I gave up on being the villain a long time ago with Karofsky’s attempted suicide. I’m done. I quit. Now I’m back on the leadership of the Warblers after what Hunter had done. I made sure the ones who followed him were all dismissed from the Warblers. It’s not all fun and games that I’m here. I’m here because I actually care, okay? Losing people- it isn’t fun. Some of you may know that, some of you may not. Believe it or not, I’m here to help. So are the rest of the Warblers.”

“And how do you know that?” Jake asked.

“It’s none of your business,” Sebastian snapped back, drawing himself back up to his full height. “I’m here to help. Expenses, lawyers, anything you need, I’m here to help.”

They all looked at each other, unsure of whether to take his proffered hand of friendship or temporary truce. “Why are you so willing to help?”

“I feel the need to make up for what I did to all of you in your senior year. When I splashed Blaine with the rock salt slushie, and now with Hunter and his steroids and… the drugs.” Sebastian deflated a little before standing up straight with a confidence they were quickly beginning to realize didn’t actually exist. 

They softened slightly. “Sebastian-“

“Don’t.” He drew himself up. “I don’t need pity.”

Santana looked at everybody else, turning a small plan over in her head.

“Alright. We’ll let you help.” Finn and Rachel gaped at her, but she waved them off. “But… on one condition.”

Sebastian lifted his head. “What is it?”

Santana’s voice softened. “Be friends with Marley.”

“What?” Everyone shouted, staring at Santana in shock.

“If it was all our faults that she got herself into this situation in the first place, she would never talk to us,” Santana pointed out. “We need a neutral point of view and this guy-“ She gestured at Sebastian. “- is perfect for the job.”

“Is that a… good idea? It seems rather profound,” Rachel admitted. “What about Kitty?”

“Kitty shares our guilt. We need to get our heads together before helping Marley. Come on. Don’t you think she deserves a fresh start?” Santana pointed out. 

“She blames herself,” Unique said.

Sebastian looked surprised, looking uncomfortable. “How am I supposed to talk to her? I’m her rival. If she blames herself, she’ll talk to you.”

“She won’t want to burden us,” Jake suddenly cut in. “She’ll be more prone to keeping things inside if we are the one to prod her about it.”

Santana nodded. “At least with you, she’s not as close. And lord knows she needs a friend who doesn’t blame themselves or is involved in the drama. Someone on the outside.”

“I say let him do it,” Artie finally spoke. 

“I say not,” Jake said, focusing hard on Sebastian. “I don’t really feel comfortable with another guy in her life.”

“I’m gay,” Sebastian scoffed, looking offended. 

“Jake, calm down,” Mike said, putting a hand on his shoulder. 

“So… who’s Marley?” Sebastian asked.

They all stared at the doctor, who looked at Santana. “You came in here to tell them about your friend Kitty, yes?”

“Yes,” Santana said tersely. “Which one of us has better news, doc?”

“I have both good and bad news. Please, you go first.”

“Kitty has an acute kidney injury from the electrolyte imbalance,” Santana said, earning a gasp from the whole room. “When she’s released we need to set her slowly back to her normal self.”

“Seems easy enough,” Puck remarked. Quinn elbowed him in the gut. “Ow.”

The doctor nodded. “And I feel that you need to tell your friends in the other room as well, what I told your friends here before they got into the fight. I’ll… repeat it again, for the benefit of your friend here,” he waved at Sebastian.

“Please, get on with it,” Santana and Sebastian said.

“You can see Marley now.” The room buzzed again, but the doctor held up a hand. “These next 72 hours are crucial for her. If she pulls through, she has a higher chance of making a recovery. But- I’ll have to warn you. The damage she had already set in her body due to her severe malnourishment and electrolyte imbalances, much worse than Kitty’s, it has caused some long term effects that we can’t quite cure. She would need a dialysis machine for a few weeks due to the near risk of kidney failure. She has a severe case of osteoporosis, so she would have to be careful. She’ll be sick more often, her menstruation would have stopped entirely. She entered hypovolemic shock, and combined with the electrolyte imbalances and kidney damage… we’re not sure if her brain would recover fully. The side complications could be anything at this point, such as seizures, blood clots…” The doctor trailed off. “Sorry. You can… you can go and see her now.”

Immediately, Santana turned around, to find Millie Rose in the corner with tears in her eyes.

“C’mon, Mrs. Rose, let’s see Marley-“

“Here, allow me,” Sebastian said with surprising gentleness, helping the lady up and guiding her to the door as everyone stared at the floor. 

“Sebastian,” Rachel called, and he paused at the doorway. “Me and Finn are coming with you.”

“No,” Santana said. “Take Kurt and Blaine instead. Rachel, Finn, go to Britt and Kitty. Blaine would want to see her.”

“Oh,” Sebastian nodded. “Okay.”

“Why is he seeing her?” Jake snarled.

“Because everyone needs to calm down first,” Sebastian said evenly. “None of you can see her until you all talk amongst yourselves. For all you know you might stress her out being in the same room as her.”

“And what makes you think she’ll not be stressed by  _ your _ presence?” Tina asked.

“Because I’m not you,” Sebastian said. “And you’re not me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "... most Cheerios find a way to counter Sue's crazy diet, Santana and Brittany being one prime example. However, it wasn't uncommon to find Cheerios- particularly the head Cheerios- suffering from some form of eating disorder due to this... Sue did keep everyone dying from under her watch, and all the Cheerios eventually graduate regardless of their mental health. Still, many Cheerios after leaving McKinley would have died early. Looking back, a lot of their health complications matched up to the complications of unchecked eating disorders..."  
> \- Excerpt from my headcanon notes
> 
> If it's not obvious, only Kitty and Marley have physical long term effects from what happened. Brittany had lost a lot of blood, but the damage was minimal. She would make a full recovery. More bad shit will happen to the gang though, just you wait. Marley and Kitty aren't the only ones facing physical problems anytime soon.
> 
> Sebastian knows some deep dark shit. What he meant at the end, for those of you confused, is referencing what Santana said: he doesn't have the same history with Marley as the others do. In a sense, he gets to start over with her, but the others can't.


	6. Chapter 6: Hart to Believe/Life's Not Looking Rose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian has a newfound respect for the Glee Club. Marley wakes up for a moment- was it a good sign? Joe faces a faith crisis when his parents crash in, forcing the rest to reconsider their faith. Unique's existence is threatened and being in the wrong place at the wrong time have Kurt, Blaine and Santana backed against the wall. Sugar snaps at Will. Sebastian, Will, Joe and Ryder make a choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More angst and arguments. Everythingphobia at its finest here. Hug everybody. 
> 
> Everybody say it with me! WE DON'T TOLERATE DISCRIMINATION!
> 
> And y'all need to talk it out! Relationships are better with open communication! Life lessons! Now kiss!
> 
> Also, these chapters are getting longer and longer.

Sebastian wasn’t sure what to expect. A girl lying on the bed, looking pale, a heart monitor maybe and the dialysis machine? Instead the sight he was greeted with was a girl with skin as white as the sheets she lay on, the dialysis machine humming beside her, drip dripping so many things into her body, including a blood bag. The heart monitor was pumping slow, erratic and weak beats, speeding up at random points, before slowing down to a dangerous crawl. He mentally kicked himself. What was he supposed to say? What was he supposed to do? 

Behind him, Blaine and Kurt both gasped. Her eyes were closed, her wrist and arms looked like they would snap easily under the lightest pressure. She had a neckbrace on, her jaw was discoloured and swelling, an ugly dark blotch against her pale skin. She had a casted left hand, a tube snaking out from under the blanket to an air ventilator? He saw a black eye forming, and for a moment he felt rage. How dare someone hurt one to this extent? Millie sobbed, coming forward and gingerly grasping Marley’s right hand. Her fingernails were tinged blue, and if he looked closer he could see her lips were blue, too.

_ Is this real? Why did they- oh God. Why? Just why? _

“Marley?” Blaine asked, as if in a daze, voice a little broken. He stepped forward, out of Kurt’s protective hold and pulled up a chair, sitting himself next to Marley. He hesitantly reached out for her casted hand. Kurt noticed this, stepping closer to put a reassuring hand on Blaine’s shoulder. 

“It’s okay,” Kurt whispered, and Blaine broke into sobs.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you. I wish I did more, but they pulled you away so fast and I just…” Blaine choked on his tears. Sebastian stepped closer, looking at Marley.

“What happened?” he asked, and Kurt looked so surprised, then at Blaine, who knew the whole story.

“Why do you care?” Kurt asked icily, and Sebastian had to flinch.

Why  _ did  _ he care?

“I… don’t know anymore,” he answered honestly. “You all make me… better.”

Blaine closed his eyes, opening his mouth as he sniffed. “Marley… suffered from an eating disorder. Maybe several. I don’t know. We knew. She collapsed at Sectionals and she… I… we…” Blaine clenched his fists, looking away from her, as if he was ashamed. 

“You didn’t do anything about it, did you?” Sebastian finished. “You left her in the lurch, left her suffering, because someone else would take care of it for you. It wasn’t your problem, or you didn’t know how to help.” Sebastian now looked at Marley. “You pitied her, but that was all you did.”

“I tried to help,” Blaine defended.

“But you knew it wasn’t enough,” Sebastian said, looking at Kurt and noting the shocked expression on his face, looking between Blaine and Marley and him.

“How do you know that?” Blaine asked.

“Been there, done that,” Sebastian shrugged. “The day I joined the Warblers, Blaine, there was a kid who joined with me. He was small, average, not so handsome, but he had a voice like an angel. I liked hearing his voice. It was magical, amazing. He was… wonderful.” Sebastian had a faraway look on his face, hands sliding into the pockets of his pants as he looked away, blinking back tears. “He had a heart of gold like no other, and he was shy, he was quiet. Maybe he wasn’t the smartest in books but he was the smartest in knowing what to do when you were feeling down.” He had a wistful look on his face. “Maybe a trip to an ice cream shop here, a cheerful song there… he was amazing.” Sebastian let his eyes close. “But he was sad. And one day he just stopped. I saw the red lines crawl up his arms. I saw him get thinner and thinner. By then I was… on this path of uncaringness. Everything was a joke, everything was fun and games! It wasn’t my problem. I pitied him, sure, but I thought someone else saw it, because he collapsed in school a couple of times. And I didn’t care- until Karofsky. I realized that like Karofsky, he too was going down this path. So I tried to chase him down, let him have a taste of what he’s offered us. The kindness and the fact that someone cared.” Sebastian gave a soft self-deprecating smirk, but it sounded wrought with tears as he shook his head. “But I… I was too late. Around that time Hunter took over, he started to give the Warblers drugs. He died a couple of days later. Drug overdose. No one could figure out where he got it. By the time I finally caught up to him… I- I couldn’t hear his voice anymore.” Sebastian gave a short, pained laugh, opening his eyes, revealing tears. “No one else figured it out. They ruled him as the only drug owner in the school. After you revealed the truth, well… I have to thank you for that. You shed some light on his death. I’m grateful.”

Kurt looked shocked. “Sebastian, I’m sorry.”

He shook his head again, wiping his tears hastily. “No. I should be the one sorry for all I’ve done. I don’t want you, or anyone to make that same mistake. Show them all that you care, because you just could… save them. Don’t be like me. You don’t know what people are going through. Just help them.”

Blaine stared at Marley. “You loved him, didn’t you?”

Sebastian physically recoiled at that, shoving his hands into his pockets. “Astute observation. He was my first love. Something I only realized right at the end of our relationship, as I stood upon his grave. Guess there was accuracy to the phrase of not knowing the worth of something until you lose it.” Sebastian laughed bitterly to himself. “You have a second chance, Blaine. Don’t screw it up. I know I wouldn’t screw up the chance to save someone else.”

Marley’s casted hand twitched and she took a shallow, shaky breath, eyes opening to reveal a pair of red rimmed, bloodshot eyes. They blinked a little, adjusting to the lighting, before looking around.

“Am I dead?” Her jaw refused to cooperate, making her words sound almost intelligible, blue eyes confused and wandering from Blaine, Kurt, Sebastian and then her mother. Her voice was raspy from disuse.

“No, honey, you’re not,” Millie sobbed, squeezing her hand a little tighter. “You’re in the hospital.”

“Oh.” She sounded so… disappointed that she was alive. Like she didn’t ever want to be, and that she was just rudely woken up from this great nap she was having. “They saved me.” Her tone was flat.

_ They may have saved her body, but sure as hell they didn’t save her mind.  _ Sebastian thought as he placed a hand on Millie’s shoulder.

“Hi,” he started awkwardly, realizing that he was about to have a first proper conversation with her. In a hospital room.

“Sebastian,” she greeted, looking confused. “Hi.”

For a moment, he didn’t know what to say. What could he say? But then Blaine was reaching out for Marley’s hand and he sort of froze when it made contact. A corner of her mouth quirked up into a small smile, and Blaine took that as encouragement to hold her casted hand.

“Heyyyy Woman Fierce,” Blaine smiled, but it was wobbly and shaky, and Kurt waved at Marley. “When are we gonna talk about comic books again?”

“Oh God,” Kurt huffed, rolling his eyes dramatically. “More comic books? Blaine, seriously?”

Sebastian latched onto this, giving Kurt a playful smirk. “You have no taste in literature.”

“You like comic books too?” Marley asked, and Sebastian couldn’t find it in himself to give a snarky, sarcastic remark, so he nodded. Her eyes lit up, almost like a dying lightbulb with a sudden surge of power to brighten, and flicker. “Thought you were too snobby for it.”

“Any respectable gentleman would have in his possession, comic books,” Sebastian said smoothly, though he wrinkled his nose. “He is no respectable gentleman.”

Kurt gave Sebastian a mock horrified gasp. “How very dare you! I’ll have you know that I am… a diva.”

“Men can be divas too,” Blaine butted in, his tears drying on his face.

“Divas can like comic books,” Marley argued, words bleeding into one another, but it was okay, because she was joking, and that was a good sign, right?

“Yeah!” Blaine cheered, poking Kurt in the side as he gave him an affectionate eye roll. “See? Divas can like comic books. Marley agrees with me.” Blaine blew a raspberry in Kurt’s direction. 

“You proclaim yourself a diva, Blaine?” Sebastian did the diva eye roll and the finger snap. “A diva is a female version of a hustler.”

“Men can be divas too,” Blaine pressed. “Right, Marley?”

She was staring right past them, concerning everyone in the room. “Marley?”

It felt like such a light moment, a reprieve, even though Sebastian knew she was playing along, but the reality had to crash down fast. She began convulsing, shocking Blaine and Millie into letting go of her, drool coming down her cheeks as the heart monitor beeped crazily and he could see her biting down hard on her tongue.

For the record, Sebastian had seen many things. He had seen real rifles shot, killing deer and other things. He had seen dead bodies, as he received an enigmatic call earlier on in the day, and then a news broadcast, and he was off in a flash, racing to McKinley High School just in time to see the last of the bodies being carried out, but no sign of the Glee Club. He had seen drugs, people high on drugs. He had seen violence. True violence, with people beating the shit out of each other with knives and brass knuckles. He had seen injustice and justice. He had seen poverty, he had seen riches. He had seen people take their last shuddering breath in front of him. He had seen crazy, desperate people, so lost in their own ideals that they did twisted things to others. He had seen kindness. He had seen mercy. 

But nothing disturbed him more than Marley’s first seizure. 

Her body jerked, writhing crazily as he helped Kurt hold back Blaine and Millie. Marley jerked upwards abruptly, causing lights to flash in the room erratically. Blood leaked from her mouth, probably from when she bit down on her tongue, as it splattered little red flecks over pristine white sheets.

“Sebastian!” Kurt shouted, eyes wild. “Get a doctor! I need to calm him down.”

“What’s wrong with him?” Sebastian asked, but the utter fear in Blaine’s eyes and the way he thrashed wildly made him think about it.

“It’s the lights and the sounds.” It sounded like an alarm had suddenly gone off in the room, explaining why Blaine was set off. He had just been through a gun event, everything relating to guns and flashing lights and loud sounds was going to be scary. “Get a nurse. Hurry!”

“Let me go!” Blaine screamed, eyes wild. He was seeing but he wasn’t seeing the room they were in. “Let me go! Don’t hurt anyone!”

“Blaine!” Kurt yelped, trying to hold Blaine back from the bed lest he hit Marley. “It’s Kurt, it’s me, you’re safe!” He had encircled his arms around Blaine, preventing him from moving away from him. “You’re safe… it’s me okay? Kurt Hummel. Kurt Hummel is here. You’re safe now Blaine, I got you…” He whispered a few more things into Blaine’s ear as Sebastian made a mad dash for the nurse’s station.

“HELP! The room! Convulsing! Something… I don’t know… something’s wrong! Please help.” He was pleading, and he felt like a little boy again as he watched them take off down the hallway to Marley’s room. His phone buzzed, and he picked it up, trying to sound as formal as he could without revealing how panicked he was. “Sebastian Smythe.”

_ “What did you think, huh?” _

“You are a massive bastard. An absolute dickwad. A no-good piece of shit,” Sebastian hissed.

_ “I thought you’d be happy. They took you out of the competition.” _

“Motherfucker. They gave me closure. They gave me closure for Ben. I didn’t want anything from you! I wanted nothing to do with you. Don’t act like I asked you to do it for me because I didn’t. I always knew how messed up you were. Mom did drop you on the head when you were born.”

_ “Shut up.” _

“I hope the police catch you and you rot in a thousand lifetimes in there, you and your stupid lover.” Sebastian paused, contemplating what he wanted to say next. “Message received, psycho. Here’s one from me to you. Leave others out of it. And leave me alone.”

_ “Sebby, you know I can’t. I have to protect you! That’s why Hunter was there.” _

“I don’t need protecting. I don’t need anything. I don’t want anything from you. You’re dead to me. I hope you go to jail, maybe they’ll give you the help you need. I didn’t want you to shoot up a school, I didn’t want you to send a druggie into the club I worked hard to rebuild from being bad and I didn’t want you in my life. I hate you.”

_ “Sebby…” _

“NEVER call me that again.” Sebastian hung up. He already made the call to the police to find them.

He looked over at Kurt and Blaine, the latter had stopped struggling, zoning out. He looked like he was sinking deeper into despair. It was a sinking pit of despair, he knew. A seemingly hopeless endeavour to swim out.

Santana was talking things out with Mercedes, as he made a mental note to remember all their names. He knows Santana, he knows Blaine and Kurt, he knows Marley, he knows… not a lot.

“Are you here for them, young man?” Someone asked from behind him, and he spun right around to size the person speaking up.

They were two middle-aged people, maybe in their late forties, with crosses around their necks and clutching bibles in their hands as if it was their lifeline. Sebastian would have laughed in their faces on any other day, but today was not the day.

“I’m just here for moral support,” Sebastian gave a small, fake smile. “Nice to meet you, sir… ma’am…?” 

“Mr. and Mrs. Hart.”

As they brushed past him, he caught sight of Millie disappearing into the toilets, Kurt clutching onto Blaine as if he would die without his touch, Santana registering the presence of the two parents as they neared the entrance to their assigned waiting room. She didn’t pay them any mind at first, continuing to talk to Mercedes about asking everyone’s parents if they could stay in the house her parents rented, because she was worried and she wanted to keep an eye on everyone. Mercedes had responded that Millie had already agreed, trusting her daughter with them. Most of their parents were absentee or almost never there, and that gave almost everyone the freedom to temporarily move in. She agreed that they shouldn’t be left alone at the moment, though for the parents that  _ were  _ present… they should probably ask them first.

“Is Joe around?” Mr. Hart asked, abruptly butting into their conversation just as it was about to shift into the topic of sending some people home so that they could rest.

“Yes… sorry, you are?” Mercedes asked.

“Joe’s parents. We’re here to take him home.” 

“I don’t know… it’s hard to pry him away from the group,” Santana shrugged, folding her arms and taking on a passive-aggressive stance, taking one glance at them and  _ balking,  _ clearly not liking what she saw in them. “He’d really like to stick with his friends though, he just… a few of them almost died.” 

“We will pray for them and all of you, but we need to take Joe. His faith must be shaken…” the mother tried, but the father seemed more like the type to carry a shotgun.

“Who are you to know what Joe wants? You are not the Lord.” 

Alarm bells finally going off, Sebastian quickly speed walked over to Kurt and Blaine, who were entering the waiting room.

“If I were you, I wouldn’t go in there.” 

“Why not?” 

“Shit will hit the fan. Christian parents plus trauma plus homos like us- not a good combo. And knowing you guys, they’ll be arguing the moment you step in. Don’t let them see you or Blaine- we need to get you to the other room, you’ll be safer there.” 

“I’m not the Lord, but it’s common sense for them to stick together and heal from this trauma. He needs others who went through the same thing as he did so that he’s not the odd one out or think he’s crazy for feeling this way. It’s basic psychology.” Santana rolled her eyes, and Sebastian found himself rolling his eyes at the parents too.

“No, what he needs is the Lord and people who have the Lord.” 

“Why not just ask him?” Sebastian butted in, clearly tired of this debate, moving so that he was blocking their view of Kurt and Blaine escaping to Kitty and Brittany’s room. “Whatever he wants to do, we’ll do.”

They looked like they were about to protest, but Mercedes cut in- “As you said, you aren’t the Lord, who were you to know what he wants?”

They angrily glowered, but Santana held their gaze easily. Sue Sylvester was way worse. Even Sebastian had heard horror stories of the woman. They brushed past and Sebastian let out a small sigh of relief, swearing that encountering people like them were the things that removed years from his life. They were minor annoyances- nothing more.

He shouldn’t have thought that so soon.

The New Directions, he realized, was a group of individuals with clashing personalities and different backgrounds with very often conflicting motives for doing any particular sort of action.

It took a lot of drive to get them together, to have them work together, which was why they were  _ individuals.  _ They were different. They would clash. 

But when they worked well together, they were one of the most powerful groups because they covered all the bases, each weakness covered by strength. Maybe the common bond between them before was this obligation to join, to sing, a school club for credit. But this was new. These were old students with new students, bonded together by just being part of this group. Sebastian used to hear, ‘once a Warbler, always a Warbler’ but he realized that the New Directions- they took it another level.

(“Sebastian,” Kurt had explained later, “we are kids who were bullied, teased, humiliated in front of the public, in front of the entire school just for singing. Every year they deface us on the school yearbook. Rachel can show you some copies- some of their drawings are kind of good, I have to admit- but the point is… we have suffered together. We can fight, we can scream and argue, we have complicated drama especially about relationships between us, but at the end of the day, when you’re with us, you’re nothing more than a loser.”

“And us losers have to stick together, right?” Ryder had smirked, crossing his arms.)

They were strong apart, but stronger together. Something he failed to see the first time around when he slushied Blaine. Something he only saw a glance of in Sectionals, the snap from Santana for him to back off. Something he was beginning to understand at the moment, as Blaine shuddered, clutching onto Kurt in the hallway as they both paused. Their strength came from their suffering, and what they learned. 

(Quinn’s pregnancy, Karofsky, Bree, the threat of the disbanding of the Glee Club, Sue Sylvester, scandals, cheats, double crossing, arguments… at the end of the day they only came out with stronger bonds- even when some things could literally tear them apart. He had to respect them. He thought they were losers- no, they were winners. They were a family. He just finds it strange how they were only seeing it in that moment, as Marley was dying. 

The thought of seeing the Warblers reduced to that point makes Sebastian freeze. He resolved to make the Warblers better. The New Directions were worthy rivals, he decided. Not because they were talented- they  _ were,  _ just not to the extent of the Warblers, who could go full acapella if needed- but because they were good. They had a level of closeness the Warblers aspired to be. Maybe they did questionable choices sometimes, but at the end of the day, it was  _ home.  _ It was a place to ultimately feel safe in, and be yourself in.

And that was the strongest point of the group: to be yourself. Sebastian wouldn’t call it a group anymore, it felt like they deserved better.

_ Individuality.  _ With contrasting uniforms and fashion wear down to their manner of speaking, Glee club had it. 

He likes the New Directions. Because even if he stood on tentative ground with them, he felt safe to be himself.)

Some people never liked changes and the new direction the wind was moving. The Glee club was prone to facing that. It instantly astounded him that they would switch from incessant arguing to defending their own in a heartbeat. And it showed here with Joe’s parents.

Tina and Jake were absolutely screaming at each other. Ryder was giving Unique the death glare, but they all fell silent as Mr. and Mrs. Hart came in, followed by Santana, Mercedes and Sebastian, who was hanging behind. He looked down the hallway to see Kurt giving him the ‘OK’ sign, as he let out a sigh of relief. Marley was okay. He turned right around to see the two parents making a beeline for Joe, ignoring WIll who raised his hand as if to tell them something, Ryder’s death glare… but pausing in front of Unique.

“Are you a boy?”

Utter silence. Jake, Puck, Mike and Ryder tensed. 

“I…” 

Will spun right around, opening his mouth to cut in, but they kept talking.

“You must be confused. We’ll pray for you.”

Santana’s nostrils flared as Mercedes marched forward to put a hand on Unique’s shoulder.

“Thank you, but she’ll be going now.” Mercedes began gesturing for Unique to go to the door, towards Sebastian who looked vaguely panicked.

“Oh… I could have sworn she was a boy…” Mrs. Hart frowned, but Mr. Hart took a step forward.

“He is, he was with those Vocal Adrenaline people last year, one of the nasty cross dressers.”

“Leave her alone,” Jake said firmly, planting himself between Unique and the two transphobes. 

“Sir, please call her by her correct gender,” Mercedes pleaded. “Don’t call her nasty either. That’s just rude.”

“He’s just confused,” Mrs. Hart insisted, to which Joe finally reached his breaking point at.

“Stop.”

“With all due respect sir, I am a  _ woman, _ ” Unique insisted in a shaky voice. “Not a  _ man. _ ”

“You’re not a real woman.”

“Hey!” Joe shouted. “Can we not do this here? Now when our friend is dying and we’re all so scared?”

“I knew this place was a bad influence on you,” Mr. Hart groaned, putting a heavy hand on Joe’s shoulder. “All these sinners.”

“We’re all sinners here,” Quinn spoke up, fists clenched at her sides. “We’re all only human.”

“God bless you…” They turned to Unique, who was hiding behind a wall of Jake, Mercedes and Santana. “Young man, if you don’t stop this life of sin and playing God, you will go to Hell!”

“And uh- who told you that?” Santana snarked. “A book written by humans?”

“God… bless me?!” Quinn asked, almost offended. “Me, after all these kids have been through, including her. None of this is fair to her.”

“He’s going to Hell, with all the gays. We’ll make sure to pray the tranny out of you.”

Now it was Sebastian’s nostrils flaring. But it was Ryder who looked between Unique and them, before stepping up.

“She is a real person. She will always be a she in my-  _ our _ eyes, and she deserves to be treated like a human being. If God judged us on how we looked and dressed, then people with Down Syndrome and deformities and terrible fashion senses would go to Hell with the transgender people,” Ryder snapped. Unique lifted her head, as Ryder looked back at her before looking back as the two parents, who looked shell shocked.

“Why would you support such a… thing?”

“Because,” Ryder stepped up. “People are people. They are who they are.” He turned back to Unique. “No matter how much they lie and hurt you, they don’t deserve this kind of treatment.”

Mr. Hart scoffed. “Come on, Joe. We’re going.”

Joe shrugged off his hand. “No.”

“No?” 

“I’m not leaving them. God says He is love, and I choose to love these people. They are my family. Don’t disrespect them. Love is love, ma, pa. Jesus said to love thy neighbour as yourself.”

“But it’s wrong!” He waved an angry hand at Unique, then at Kurt and Blaine, who were standing at the doorway, Kurt pressing a gentle kiss to Blaine’s head but abruptly pulling away. “It’s not natural!”

“My girlf- no, the girl that I still love is in one of these rooms waiting to be released after being shot. She almost died. These are people, real people with feelings and love and it’s not wrong to love,” Santana shot back, holding back from cussing out these two people in front of her.

“You’re all going to- this is insane- Joe!” His parents turned to him. “You can’t be picking these sinners over us!”

“As she said, we’re all sinners here,” Sebastian said, backing them up.

Everyone seemed to forget that Sebastian was gay.

“I am, and I will. They need me. Love is love. You made sure I knew that, and that God is with me, but there are some things I disagree with you on,” Joe said decisively, before striding towards Unique and abruptly pulling her into a hug. “It’s gonna be okay.”

“Don’t touch him-!” The shout came too late as everybody else glowered at them, even the parents who had come. “You’re all going to Hell!”

“That’s enough, you are scaring my students,” Will spoke sharply, standing in front of them. “You need to leave. They have been through a traumatizing time.”

“Are you teaching them this?”

“Can you shut your pie hole for like, two seconds?” Sugar snapped. “‘Cause that would be awesome. We get this in school already, we don’t need some dumb parents in the mix.”

“Sugar!” Will scolded. She gave a ‘whatever’ shrug, rubbing her hands on her skirt repetitively. 

“Can you blame me? We get bullied and teased and splashed with slushies for being gay, stupid, idiotic, singing retards,” Sugar recounted bitterly. “Last year,  _ some  _ people threw a slushie at Blaine filled with rock salt. What happened? He had eye surgery.”

Sebastian stared at the ground as Sugar continued her rant, becoming more and more agitated and hands flying and flapping as she spoke.

“You didn’t listen to Artie when he said that enough was enough. You weren’t there when Marley fainted. Bullying exists within the club- but you don’t do anything about it. And now that we’re being discriminated against and told that we’re going to Hell just because we are friends with people who are queer or are queer ourselves, you want us to stand down? Marley’s  _ dying _ , Mr. Schue. We don’t know when we’re going to die, be it in one minute or in the next couple of years. We’re not going to let whatever time we have left being pushed around and bullied or turn the other cheek. We don’t have time, Mr. Schue. Don’t tell me,  _ us _ , it’s all going to be better because it won’t if we don’t do anything! Don’t tell us to turn the other cheek and be the better man because we have been stepped on far too many times to be nice and forgiving. Mr. Schue, the only other time we were actually respected was when we stood up for ourselves. We need to show these people that it’s not okay, Mr. Schue. If you’re with us, don’t stop any of us on this. If you aren’t… we won’t be surprised. If you can’t do this for us… at least do it for Marley.”

Everybody stared at Will, who looked flabbergasted as Sugar walked past him and stood with Joe. 

“The alums have a place for us to stay where we can all be together. I texted my dad about it and he was fine. You can stay with us if they decide to kick you out after this,” Sugar said, trying to be supportive.

“I think they will…” Joe gulped, but was resolute. “But I stand by my decision to stay.”

“So, what’s it going to be?” The question was directed at the Glee director, who just stood there with a mouth open wide.

“The Lord will not forgive you if you don’t come with us!” Mr. Hart snapped, full of rage, pointing at the ground in front of him, as if Joe was a dog who had to obey his every command.

“Correction: you mean  _ you  _ won’t forgive him if he doesn’t come with you,” Santana defended, stepping forward into their space, and Mrs. Hart slapped her. Hard.

The smack resonated through the room, Blaine shrinking behind Kurt, Ryder instinctively freezing, Jake was in shock, but his hands were trembling. 

“Get out.” The growl was from Will as he moved between the two parties, Mercedes and Quinn helping Santana up. “You will not lay a hand on any of my students. You will not insult, degrade or ostracize them. Joe made his choice. Now leave.”

“As their teacher, maybe you should-”

**“I SAID,** **_LEAVE_ ** **.”**

Both parents were stunned at the harsh, angry tone that took on Will’s voice as he seemed to tower over both of them. He took one step forward, towards them, and Mr. Hart decided to poke the bear one more time.

“We weren’t insulting your students! We were just showing them what was the correct way and-”

If Will had had super strength in that moment, he could have picked up Mr. Hart by the throat and crushed him from the way he advanced like a predator.

“You said we were going to Hell,” Will said simply. “You are basically telling a room of troubled kids that their lives will inevitably go down to a place where they suffer for all eternity for loving someone. For being associated with someone who loves someone. For being themselves. Is that what God wants? They have been through hell and back, suffering guilt long festering within them with people like you breathing down their necks. And maybe I was part of the problem by looking past this. But no more. I want you to leave. Leave before I call security and tell them you assaulted someone.”

Santana had a clear red handprint forming on her face as she scowled at them. With a room full of witnesses, it wasn’t hard.

“Actually, they don’t have a choice,” Sebastian said, folding his arms as he strode back into the room. “I called security already.” 

Everybody tensed. Sebastian seemed to notice this, and rolled his eyes. 

“I told them not to bring guns. I thought some of you could… use not seeing one in person for a while. They agreed, so you’re all safe.”

Everybody relaxed slightly. Sebastian gave a mocking grin at the Harts, giving them a thumbs down. 

“Reconsider. The Lord will welcome you back with open arms.”

“Yeah… no.” Everybody just looked plain uncomfortable at this point. “You need to leave.”

Some of the more religious members like Quinn were shifting, clearly not used to being placed in a situation where they had to pick their faith or their friends. But everybody remained resolute as Santana stood straight up, pushing Sebastian aside, and confronted the couple.

“Listen. My abuela doesn’t agree with me but at least she doesn’t actively go around and say she’ll pray the gay out of me or slap the hell out of people. That’s mostly me or Q-ball’s thing. If you can’t be supportive of your son, get out.”

Joe looked sad, mostly.

(Later, Sebastian would see Joe and his parents and their final confrontation on this front, this time about treating them as charity cases- Joe argued that they were not things to be pitied. They needed help, but they didn’t need pity. By that time, Joe was already living on his own, and the fact that was happening was enough to empower him to stand up to them. That was a darker period than this current one.

He still can’t get it out of his head years later as Marley had snarled, “I don’t need help!” or that image of Sam tackling Kitty out of the way of a bottle shattering over her head, or Rachel’s screaming as he saw someone try to get at her- that dark period in New York. But that was later, and Sebastian was getting off track. The point was- he’d see that same sad expression twisted and dark on the members in later years on both the New Directions, and his Warblers.)

“Santana, do you think we should get some ice for that slap?” Tina asked, as the security guards escorted the two parents out of the room. The shouting match had stopped temporarily, overridden by the concern and the need to stick together for the time being, though there was the prickle of tension in the air.

“I’m fine, Tina,” Santana scowled, rubbing her cheek. “That bitch better not find herself near you again and saying such bullcrap, or I’m going to be the one slapping the lights out of her!”

“Whoa, calm down,” Joe said, worriedly. “They may have said not nice things, but no one should hit anyone back. Not that I don’t want you to, but…”

“But?” Sugar prompted.

“... they have resources, and knowing them, they’ll use the church to their advantage,” Joe said sadly. “It’s going to be a huge scandal.”

“It’s not a big deal,” Santana said, looking over everybody. “We were clearly in the right here.”

Sebastian stood straighter. “Whatever happens, I’ll try to mitigate the damage.”

Everyone looked at Sebastian. He raised an eyebrow at them.

“What? I want to make sure I have a worthy competitor when the Warblers come back next year. And this event will not stop that.”

Sugar snickered. “Does that mean you care about us?”

Sebastian himself was still debating that answer, so he gave a scoff. “I care.”

“The way you came in earlier clearly didn’t show that,” Puck laughed. “Is the Warbler a softie?”

“Well, for your information, without me the perpetrators will not be arrested, so ha.”

“Oh yeah, you know the people who shot them,” Tina said slowly, pondering over it. “Who are they? Is this a hit on us?”

Confusion and hurt coloured Sebastian’s face. “What? Why would I do that? Why would I want you dead? I don’t want anybody dead.”

“Who are they, Warbler?” Santana snapped.

“It’s… my brother and his girlfriend,” Sebastian sighed, dragging a hand down his face. “He has a violent way of protecting me. He thought your entire school was nothing but a threat to me- considering how Sam and Blaine broke into our school to steal back the trophy, or that we consistently just lost to you for some strange reason to him. He sent in Hunter to be the leader to protect me when I stepped down, and then you guys got him disqualified, which I am thankful for because it gives me so many closures and the chance to rebuild the Warblers… he snapped. He wanted to leave a message. When he saw Marley, he made that a more… lasting message.”

“Your brother is sick,” Jake said, pale as a ghost.

“I know. My family is full of untold villains,” Sebastian gave a ghost of a smile, putting a hand on his hip and pinching the bridge of his nose in irritation and stress. “Apparently the Warblers were full of villains too, to the point where most of the good ones kinda… went.”

Kurt and Blaine looked down, at what Sebastian had admitted earlier in the hospital room with Marley. Something told them that he still harbored a bunch of guilt from doing bad things, maybe indirectly blaming himself for this as well.

“You’re gonna be part of this mess,” Santana said, waving a hand at the entire room, to Marley’s room, to Brittany and Kitty’s room. “You can’t exactly leave.”

“I’m not. I may have been a shit to you in the past but that’s it. It’s in the past. I need to fix what my brother did,” Sebastian stood his ground. “I have so many reasons to help, but I can’t tell you all of them.”

“She’s not saying that because we distrust you,” Artie said. “Once you’re in with us, you become a loser like us. So, you in?”

“Loser? I doubt you guys are-” Sebastian caught himself as he met Kurt’’s eye.

“I don’t think even you are willing to throw away being popular in McKinley,” Puck scoffed.

“I don’t even go there. And I’m not popular there anyways.”

“You’d be surprised,” Artie mumbled. “Last chance. Once you’re in this, you’re all in.”

Sebastian breezed out the door before he could answer, making a beeline for Marley’s room. He was mentally kicking himself for the mental crisis he was having now. Millie wasn’t around, it was just Marley and a nurse checking her over. The nurse smiled at him, gently.

“Hi, I assume you’re the one who called the nurses?”

“Y-yeah. Yes, that’s me,” Sebastian said, as Marley’s eyes cracked open and she turned her head weakly to him.

“You’re back,” she rasped. She tried to smile at him but her jaw refused to cooperate. 

“Please be careful. She had a seizure. We’re not sure if this is a long term onset of the brain damage, but if it is, please tell your friends that it will take a long time before the seizures go away, or maybe not at all.” Marley closed her eyes at that, face scrunching up in a little pain. 

“I will,” Sebastian said, watching the nurse go, before seating himself next to Marley. He was surprised no one was looking for him yet, but he knew that they thought he split.

Marley opened her eyes and looked at him. The curious blue in her eyes was replaced by an almost dull shade of grey. He found it very odd and familiar, watching someone’s light go out like that. He swallowed hard.

“You look like you ran from the pits of Hell,” Marley commented, but her tone was flat. Sebastian still barked out a laugh.

“Funny, I had a crazy old bat telling me I belong there because I’m gay. And you look like you got run over by a truck.”

“Weird. I think that’s better than the situation I was put in,” Marley sighed sarcastically, and Sebastian instantly felt bad for taking a dig at her appearance, considering that she looked like a truck hitting her would instantly break her into two. “Did they ask you to keep an eye on me? Make sure I don’t do anything stupid?”

“No…” But Sebastian could see why, though. There were hidden bandages under the hospital gown, just out of sight of her sleeves. If he looked closely enough, her arms were littered with tiny scars, like tally marks. Marley put her casted hand on her exposed arm, feeling self-conscious. 

“They wiped off all the makeup,” she frowned, looking back up at him. “You look like you have a lot on your mind.”

“So do you,” Sebastian shot back.

Marley gave a bitter smile. “It doesn’t feel like I have one. Brain damage.”

Sebastian blinked at her, before sighing and slumping on the chair. “I just need to make amends. But I don’t know.”

“It depends on what you need to make amends with, and how badly you want to make amends.” Marley paused for a moment, sifting through her brain in a pause that Sebastian was so sure that if they were not in the hospital, would never exist. He had no desire to call her stupid or slow for taking a long time to gather her thoughts, as he was prone to do. Truth be told, he needed the pause too, to gather his thoughts.

They sat in silence for a little bit.

“It was my brother who shot you. He was sending a message to protect me, when I didn’t want it. He just… did.”

“And you feel guilty. On top of all you’ve done. Is that it?”

The unspoken  _ ‘There’s more’  _ was in the air. Marley looked at him warmly as he just scoffed, but his eyes said it all.

“You know, by staying and talking to me nicely and not killing me… it looks like you made that first step,” Marley encouraged, and Sebastian realized- he already made his choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments make me happy! Leave comments please!
> 
> I will give you some comfort in the next chapter, promise.
> 
> Sebastian, Marley and Blaine are the superhero trio and nothing can change my mind. Sebastian and Marley I feel like would make the best friendships because they balance each other out. Sebastian would teach Marley to be more confident, Marley would teach him to be more kind.
> 
> Also, I really- I can't see Jarley as endgame. I'm so sorry, but Supergirl kinda ruined me ;-; now I only see Marley with someone who looks like Katie McGrath, but for that record, I'm gonna give them a better ending break-up than some random cheating because Jake deserves way better than that. Also, this characterization of Jake doesn't quite suit Marley either. 
> 
> I'll bring in Marley's endgame in a following sequel. This story will cover till the seniors graduate, then it's open season full AU from there. They don't get randomly transferred okay? Sue just disbands the club. Way happier then.
> 
> (Some of these scenes though- it breaks my heart.)


	7. Chapter 7: I'm Berry Sorry/Blaine It on You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rachel makes a promise she's not sure she can keep. The New Directions realize the situation one of their own was put in and the effects of brain damage. The boys get angry at the girls. Blaine reveals what he knew. Finn, Rachel, Santana and Kurt discuss what to do, including deciding to keep a very vital piece of information away from everybody. Finn...
> 
> Marley has claustrophobia- and a full on meltdown.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lOok aT Me i'M sAnDRa DeE
> 
> I like Kitty, I really do, but it was hard to like her at that moment. And Tina. They did Tina dirty. And Artie. And Sam. 
> 
> They failed most of the characters.
> 
> I like calling Blaine, Sebastian and Marley the Comic Book Trio. Ryder isn't counted because he didn't play an actual hero/villain even though he was on Supergirl... Kitty would call them the 'geek squad'. Other notable squads/friend groups would be the Cheerio squad, the Queer Peers, Diva squad, spice girls, Bushwick Gang, Jock squad, 'I-have-been-in-the-middle-of-love-triangles' squad, 'I-HAVE-BEEN-CHEATED-ON' squad etc.  
> Some squads exist already, some will form over time :)  
> (Unholy Trinity is pretty much a given here.)
> 
> Headcanons that appear: Nerd Sebastian, Nerd Blaine, Nerd Marley, Touchy Blaine, Protective Blaine, Rachel trying to be a decent human being unlike the show because smh, Finn caring and not being a total dickwad like the show, Protective Santana etc.
> 
> i cant do exams send help

They remained quiet for a moment.

“I feel like I’m sideways,” Marley chuckled hollowly, causing Sebastian to tilt his head. “And that several hours have just passed by- has it been several hours?”

“Uh, no. Just a minute. Are you feeling okay?”

For a moment, Marley didn’t seem to register the question, focused on something else, before snapping back to reality and looking confusedly at Sebastian. Everything felt fuzzy and weird to her, and she had to close her eyes for a moment before opening them to realize Sebastian had shifted positions, holding a bunch of flowers with a nurse checking her over.

“Wha-? What happened?” Marley asked, and she could practically feel the slurring of her words as Sebastian set the flowers aside for her, quickly settling down next to her.

“You zoned out for five minutes, enough time for me to zip out and get some flowers from the hospital general store and get a nurse.”

“It’s called an absence seizure,” the nurse explained patiently, looking over her vitals. “Mostly marked by staring spells.”

“She told me not to worry,” Sebastian explained, shifting uneasily. 

“Is it- uh… is it- is it…” Marley frowned, mind racing to find the word, but she found herself drawn to looking at the flowers. “What’s the word for a short time?”

“Uh… I don’t exactly know what you’re talking about,” Sebastian said apologetically, but this frustrated Marley to no end, as she frowned.

“She’s going to be very confused, maybe for a long while,” the nurse said kindly. “The seizures may stay for longer, but with time the confusion will go away.”

“But the confusion is why?” Marley asked.

“It’s because of your brain damage, sweetie.”

Sebastian winced at that, as Marley’s face went from confused and deep thinking to crushed in an instant. “Oh.”

“It’s going to be okay, because you have wonderful friends who will support you,” the nurse smiled, nodding to Sebastian, then excusing herself as tears ran down Marley’s cheeks.

“I feel stupid,” was the first thing out of Marley’s mouth.

“You’re not stupid,” Sebastian refuted, sitting next to her. “It’s just… temporary, is all.” He had no idea how to comfort her. He wasn’t one for hugging random strangers. 

“I hate this.”

Sebastian pulled out his phone, going through the comics he had saved. “... who’s your favourite comic book character?”

A ghost of a smile appeared on Marley’s face. “Really?”

“Really. Who’s your favourite?” Sebastian said.

“DC hero would have to be Supergirl. DC villain… Joker. Marvel hero would have to be Gwen Stacy-“

“Really? You’re going for another Spiderman clone?” Sebastian joked, and this time, Marley laughed.

“Shut up, I like her costume.” Marley paused for another really long moment. “Marvel villain, Carnage.”

“Definitely has points for being such a chilling and powerful villain,” Sebastian agreed. “But there are not a lot of good villains under Marvel, are there?”

Marley took another long moment to think. “I don’t think so. I do like Loki and Thanos though.”

“Ah, yes. When Deadpool and Thanos fight for the attention of Lady Death,” Sebastian said, scrolling through his comics before letting out a noise of satisfaction, presenting the mentioned comic to Marley. “It’s pretty awesome though.”

Marley squinted at the screen, confusion colouring her face. Sebastian worried that he did something wrong, and made to pull his hand back, but Marley began to try to read the words on the screen aloud.

“D-d-deeeee- deeeeh… deeeah…” Marley struggled, and Sebastian belatedly realized that Marley could not read, if the frustrated crinkle on her forehead was anything to go by.

Oh no. Sebastian pulled back his arm, looking up a small word and showing the screen again to her. “Can you read this for me?”

“Ssss- no, wait… ccccccc- cc- cccaaaaaa-ttt. Cc-aa-tt. Cat. I think,” Marley squinted at the screen, as if she could not see.

Sebastian blinked. “Okay… can you try and read the comic title again?”

“Dddd-deeee-aahhhd…. p-p-pooool… vssssss T-T-T… ha ha nnnnnohs?”

“Marley, that was supposed to be Deadpool versus Thanos.”

“The words look really weird to me and I have to say them… uh… say them by uh each letter!” Marley grumbled, and Sebastian sighed. So the brain damage had also rendered Marley illiterate as well. She seemed to know that she had a pretty big vocabulary before, but with the whole incident, she had basically dropped most complicated functions, going back to the beginning. That pause in the middle of the sentence made Sebastian think that she was about to say a huge word, but she just… couldn’t.

“Here, let me read to you, then.” 

“I don’t want to. I want to read it on my own,” Marley snapped, and Sebastian was taken aback by the sudden hostility in her voice.

“Whoa, calm down, I didn’t mean to offend,” Sebastian tried, but Marley’s heart rate was spiking with the sudden onset of anger. “You’re acting like a child.”

That- was probably the wrong thing to say as Marley screamed at him to get out, heart rate beeping crazily as a nurse, a different nurse came in.

“I HATE YOU!”

“Whoa- what!” He was confused and terrified with the sudden turn of events rather than mad and even more confused when the nurse injected something into her drip, forcing Marley to calm down and enter into a sleep. “What just happened?”

“A symptom of her brain damage. She can get very angry at small things, maybe for no reason, and she has no control over them. Don’t hold it against her, the mood swings will go away in time, though if you ask me, the aggression within her is something you need to help her work out. With the brain damage, she has poor impulse control.”

“But why can’t she read?” Sebastian asked.

“People with moderate brain damage have cognitive issues. She won’t be able to process, read or write like you can. She may even have difficulty with social cues.”

“So in a way, she’s basically learning everything again?” Sebastian asked.

“Not quite. The parts of her brain that allows her to learn have been impacted as well. There’s a low chance that it’s permanent, so it should go away in time, and she’ll be able to learn how to read and write again.”

“And if it is? Permanent, I mean?”

_ She’ll just have to be illiterate forever.  _

That sentence went unsaid in the air as the nurse left the room yet again, followed by Rachel and Finn entering.

“Sebastian?”

“Hi,” he said dryly. “You missed the screaming.”

“Is she okay?”

“I wish I had good news on that front,” Sebastian said glumly, before eyeing their joined hands. “Are you dating?”

“What? No!” They both released each other’s hands like it was poison, and it made Sebastian laugh out loud. “We’re just friends.”

“You kissed. On stage. On Regionals.” 

“It didn’t matter,” Rachel said, and Finn looked quite hurt. Sebastian wanted to comment on it, but he was more interested in the sweat dripping down Finn’s brow even though it was relatively cool in the room. “Is she going to be okay?”

“I’m not sure,” Sebastian admitted. “She’s going to face a lot of difficulty from here on out. She snapped at me. She didn’t know how to read!”

Rachel looked sad, sitting next to Sebastian and reaching for Marley’s hand. “I just feel like wrapping her up in bubble wrap at this point, after what happened,” Rachel admitted. “All of them.”

“She’s okay,” Finn said.

“But she has brain damage,” Sebastian said softly.

“No. We can do this. We can help her,” Rachel said, determinedly. “What does Marley like?”

“All I know is that she likes comic books… not sure if she likes flowers, I have been told they were a thing you got for sick people…” Sebastian said awkwardly.

“Maybe we can get Brittany’s cat in here? She likes cats,” Finn suggested, and both Rachel and Sebastian gave him a ‘really?’ look. 

There was a gentle knock on the door, and they all turned to the source of the sound, with Sam opening the door, red eyes prominent for the three of them to see.

“I need to tell you all what happened,” he blubbered. “I gotta- I need to-”

“Sam…”

The truth was never less horrifying. Rachel had stared at Sam as he explained to everyone in the waiting room, the ones who weren’t there, what happened, with Will adding on to the story. Tina looked like she wanted to vomit. 

Rachel was no stranger to hearing horrifying things done. She had seen, first hand, how horrible people can be. With her fathers, it was commonplace, and Rachel had always learned that the world was cruel and unfair.

(That knowledge didn’t stop Rachel from developing deep insecurities and depression and anxiety- constantly checking over her shoulder for people heckling, booing, throwing rocks or eggs. She would barely admit this to anyone, but there were days where she felt like running away because everyone seemed to be looking at her and it felt like too much- too  _ much. _ )

She had sharp eyes, observant eyes and ears that were trained to pick up the smallest sounds in music and pitch and tone, and Rachel saw everything.

She saw the way Sam’s shoulders were shaking as he talked, hands moving wildly as if it would make telling the story better.

Quinn’s fingers were tap, tap, tapping in a rhythmic staccato that uneased Rachel, almost like a ticking time bomb waiting to go off, a countdown to something devastating. But it didn’t make sense- the worst was over. Wasn’t it?

Finn was weird, with the way the sweat dripped from his brow, from his mood swings to the shifting eyes, constantly looking for something that wasn’t there. Rachel didn’t miss the way his hands were shaking as they held hands earlier, goosebumps appearing on his skin as her touch trailed along his arm, which Rachel noticed had a few marks, shaped like large mosquito bites and blackened veins. But they were mostly hidden underneath his leather jacket. He was sniffling a lot more often, which Rachel thought was from crying, but a look at Finn’s eyes told her he wasn’t crying. He just looked really tired.

As Sam talked, Will added on, Sebastian filled in the few blanks of their motives, explaining his brother’s intents as they fell silent.

“We have one on dialysis and one with both dialysis and brain damage and maybe more,” Rachel said slowly. 

“It isn’t that bad… right? The brain damage, I mean,” Sugar said hesitantly.

“She couldn’t read,” Sebastian said sourly. “If you consider that ‘not that bad’ I really don’t want to know what your definition of ‘really bad’ is.”

“We can teach her how to read again, right?” Puck asked, hopefully.

“She’ll have difficulty learning again,” Sebastian reiterated.

“If it’s just the reading part it’s okay, we can help her-” Tina started, but Sebastian sighed, irritated that they were not listening to him. 

“Did you miss the implication that there was more?” Sebastian asked. 

“She’s awake though.”

“Yeah, and she’s not quite the person you’re used to seeing,” Sebastian snapped, before deflating, feeling like he should tell them the lessons he learned, but realizing they probably wouldn’t quite believe him. “She’s basically a shell of her former self now because she can’t  _ read,  _ she takes long pauses in replies, she has seizures, she snaps at the smallest things because she can’t control herself, she can’t speak properly- she’s slurring her words, heck she even told me the room was sideways.”

“Why were you there anyways?” Someone asked, bitterly. “I thought you ditched us.”

“I made my choice, if it wasn’t obvious,” Sebastian scoffed, though Rachel could hear the hurt in his voice. “So anyways, what are you going to do about the situation?”

“Assuming Marley pulls through…” Everybody glared at Jake, who shrank back.

“Dude, that’s your girlfriend,” Joe whispered. “Why would you say that?”

“Are we deluding ourselves that she’s going to pull through? She’s awake, she’s talking, but her body might not pull through- if her mind doesn’t decide it wants to give up first…” Jake pointed out.

“You’re her boyfriend, be her reason to not give up!” Sugar exclaimed.

“That’s… not how it works,” Rachel said softly. Everyone stared at her for this admission, and she shrank back from the gazes, before pushing through, refusing to show that she was anything but determined and hardworking while she was at McKinley. “You can’t force someone to live  _ for  _ a person. It’s not healthy for both parties.”

“Rachel’s right,” Kurt said simply. “It’s not fair for Marley and it causes unnecessary stress on the person being an anchor. She needs a goal to live for, or something for her to realize life isn’t worth giving up for and that she should fight for it.”

“But ultimately it’s her decision,” Finn said shakily, but resolutely. “It always will be, always has been.”

“If I may,” Sebastian piped up, crossing his arms in front of him in a defensive stance. “But from what you told me, and every other one of your alumnus in this room, why are you trying so hard to save Marley now, when you all seem to have bullied her, teased her and made fun of her in the past? I mean- do you know how hypocritical that sounds?”

“We didn’t!” Tina protested weakly, but everybody knew it was a first reaction, a defensive measure. Artie had just clammed up again.

“But you did,” Blaine rasped, getting up. He was wobbly, and Kurt grabbed onto him so that he didn’t fall. His eyes were bloodshot and red-rimmed, and his voice got stronger and far more angry with every word. His eyes blazed with a sudden fury. He pointed at Tina and Sugar and Unique. “I know you guys and Kitty and Brittany had a sleepover before Glease. I know what you did- you all made fun of Marley there for getting the lead role. I know that somewhere around that point Marley started getting thin-” He sounded more exasperated with himself as he said that. “- and I know that Marley said she wouldn’t go unless you were invited, Unique.” Blaine pointed an accusing finger at Unique. “She  _ hated  _ that you weren’t invited. But then- you do this kind of bullcrap?! Turn around and backstab her? Then she wishes she didn’t exist because she thinks she’s a burden and  _ now  _ you all pull a surprised Pikachu face?!”

“I didn’t do anything!” Unique protested.

“THAT WAS THE PROBLEM! You  _ didn’t do anything, _ ” Blaine spat. 

Rachel interrupted. “Blaine, calm down.”

“Well you didn’t do anything either!”

“Oh I didn’t! Number one! I wasn’t there! Number two! I tried to make her feel included! Number three!  _ I’m not enough, you fucking idiots!”  _ Blaine snapped back. “You blamed her for Sectionals. For fainting. Did you consider what would have pushed her to be this way?” Blaine shoved Tina abruptly, and everyone gasped, even Kurt.

Blaine was never really physical with Tina.

His chest was heaving, fists clenched at his sides, now that the fear and self loathing had passed, the aggression and pent up anger that had built up over watching Marley silently suffer over the months was spilling over. Sam frowned at the floor, knowing full well that his girlfriend was in the wrong, but they were all in this situation, and Marley wasn’t the only one hurt-

“It’s not just her who’s hurt!” Tina snapped back. “Kitty’s hurt too! Brittany as well! Why are you focusing on Marley?!”

Blaine scoffed, staring at the ceiling. “Unbelievable. Un-fucking-believable.”

“Wasn’t the point here, Teeny Tiny,” Santana muttered under her breath, scowling at Tina, though the reminder of Brittany being hurt caused her to grit her teeth and clench her fists. 

“Tina, come on,” Rachel sighed, stepping in front of Tina. “If something else happens to Marley and we didn’t do anything to stop it, we’ll never be able to live with ourselves.”

Tina shifted uncomfortably, remembering Rachel mention something eerily similar when Kurt was bullied by Karofsky. 

“But, Tina’s right, Britt and Kitty were hurt as well,” Santana said, trying to bring everybody back to the present. “We need to know what we’re up against.”

“Kitty needs a special diet, until she gets back on her feet, and therapy,” Quinn said quietly. “Actually, a lot of people here need therapy.”

“That’s expensive,” Jake protested.

“Well, I’m footing a lot of your bills,” Sebastian said.

“I’m pitching in as well,” Sugar added.

“I’m providing the safe space,” Santana said, waving her hand when everyone was about to protest about the bills. “My parents- they follow Lima news. It’s fine. I spoke to some of your parents earlier, some were hesitant, but they allowed. You’re staying with us-”

A knock on the door interrupted Santana who groaned. 

“I swear, every time we’re about to go on a monologue or a plan, there’s always an interruption,” Rachel muttered.

When the police officers entered, everyone caught sight of the guns in their holsters. Blaine, still with all the anger and pent up aggression, dragged Tina behind him, viewing the officers as a threat. Sebastian lifted his head, and together with Santana, blocked the officers from walking closer to them.

“Sorry, um, think you could leave the guns outside for a bit, sirs?” Santana sassed. “They went through an ordeal with guns and I don’t think they need to see more guns at the moment.”

“Yeah… maybe let’s speak outside, yes?” Sebastian asked, steering the officers outside.

“Santana- have some ice,” Puck muttered. “Because you need to chill.”

Before they could argue further, Rachel and Finn slipped out of the room, taking Blaine, Sam and Kurt with them, before Blaine would lose his shit in the middle of the room with the officers, and Sam was itching to return to Brittany. The others were quickly backing up Sebastian and Santana in answering questions. Returning to the room with Kitty and Brittany, they were surprised to find Millie standing outside.

“Rachel?” Millie asked. Rachel immediately stood at attention, going over to her.

“Mrs. Rose? I thought you’d be with Marley?”

“She’s sleeping at the moment- they’re trying to put her through an MRI- but Marley has always suffered from claustrophobia. It got worse in her previous school, but she’ll never tell me why.” Millie pursed her lips. “They’re trying to do it while she’s sedated, so her room is empty at the moment.”

“We’re trying to make it a conducive environment for Marley,” Rachel reassured. “We’re trying all we can to help everyone.”

“I know,” Millie said. “Could you promise me something?”

“I-I’m not sure if I can keep any promise at the moment, but I’ll try,” Rachel said hesitantly.

Millie smiled a ghost of a smile, clasping her hands over Rachel’s. “Take care of Marley, okay?”

“We’re already trying to do that though,” Finn said, confused.

Millie laughed and shook her head, grabbing Finn’s hand and letting it hold Rachel’s. “I know Blaine, Santana and Jake have been trying really hard, but she needs people to look up to- not just as friends. I’m sure Santana would be the best she-devil protector of Marley and Blaine be her superhero friend… but she needs something I know I can’t give… but I know you can.” 

“I-I don’t understand…” Rachel stuttered, but Finn’s eyebrows rose.

“Mrs. Rose…”

“I’m asking you both, because she loves you both and looks up to you both as mentors. Oh she’ll speak of Santana and Kurt and Puck, but she’s never really spoken to me about them the way she spoke about you.”

(“... I see you made new friends?”

“Yeah. They’re cool. It’s nice that they’re all living their dreams in New York, and Finn is assisting with the Glee club, and he’s super supportive of me in whatever I do. And Rachel is… she’s annoying, but she means well. It’d be nice to learn from her, actually. She has a lot of talent.”

And later, Millie would eavesdrop accidentally on Marley’s conversation with Rachel over the phone.

“... hey, Rachel. Yeah, I’m good. The Glee club’s okay. No- Finn hasn’t burned down the choir room. I-I want to show you something- a song I wrote. I haven’t really shown anyone yet, but I want to show you… no. You’re the first, actually. I’m not sure if I wanna show my mom… I wanted to show it to Finn, but I chickened out, so I figured telling you and doing it over the phone is easier… I don’t know if I want to show the others… I just think they hat-” Marley seemed to catch herself before she could finish her sentence. “I just think that they’re going to say something that’s not very constructive.”

Rachel must have said something amusing, because Marley laughed softly. 

“You’re a big shot talent. You went into NYADA, and I… trust you, I guess. I’m supposed to step into your shoes, so I-I kinda thought…” Marley smiled at the floor as she trailed off. “No, I’m not aiming to be the next Rachel Berry. There’s only one of those, and she’s in New York… I think I’m inflating your ego a bit too much, huh, Rachel?”

Marley laughed again, and this time Millie peeked through the door to find Marley curled up on the floor, blanket over her head in the corner with notebooks strewn with angry scrawls and scribbles of various colours and her guitar sat next to her with pliers and guitar strings and bandages.

“I wanted to show you because… I just do. I trust you.” And looking back at this memory now, Millie should have known something was amiss, because Marley’s voice was scratchy and hoarse as if she was screaming and crying beforehand. “What? No, no… I’m not. I’m okay, really.” Marley paused, but if Millie had listened closer, she would have heard a deep, shuddering breath as if she was holding back tears. The blanket over Marley’s head shifted as she curled up even tighter on herself, laying on her side on the floor. “So, the song is…”

Millie should have known something was wrong- her daughter was near but distant, Happy but tired. She ate less, she was out more- Millie had chalked it up to Marley actually having  _ friends. _ But it didn’t seem like the case since the people who gave a shit were… in New York or in school but it wasn’t enough- because she was already out of their grasp.)

Rachel looked down, remembering the many conversations she had with the young girl, about songs, about stars, about life in general. There were many times where Rachel had wanted to comment on Marley’s hesitant pauses or corrections or sometimes barely hidden sniffles when she called New York. Her voice was normally scratchy and hoarse and Rachel wasn’t a stranger to after-crying voices. Of course Rachel would hear the different tones and inflections in Marley’s voice, she was trained to pick up the smallest detail in music. She could hear the pain sometimes when she had hurt herself, the underlying tired slur in her voice even, but Rachel could never unhear how broken Marley sounded after Sectionals.

( _ “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. I should have just stayed focused.”  _

_ “Calm down… you fainted.” _

_ “I wasn’t supposed to. It’s all my fault. Now Glee club is over.” _ )

(Rachel now hears the unspoken ‘I hate myself’ in that conversation. From the way Santana reacted and acted when they arrived back in Lima after hearing the news, Santana probably hears it too.

They were fools- if Rachel was a good actress with crying, then Marley was the best one of them all by not crying.

It was funny how the world worked. Rachel knew what it was like to be in her shoes… why didn’t she see it coming?)

And then she feels the wave of guilt. She’s not sure if she could keep this promise, but she would damn well try.

(She has a sinking feeling guilt is what drives the Glee club together. And it is glaringly obvious with the situation.)

“I promise.”

Finn gripped her hand tighter, drawing her attention back to him as he smiled at her.

“I promise, too.”

There was an ear splitting shriek down the hallway.

_ “NO! I’M NUH GOIN IN DERE! YOU CAN’T MAKE ME!” _

“Marley,” Millie whispered. “Her claustrophobia.”

Rachel and Finn tore down the hallway, following the screaming and sobbing. Millie was following behind. Rachel had burst into the room, with Marley wriggling away, she was slurring, eyes wide with fear and terror. The nurses around her were torn between manhandling her or leaving her be. Rachel could already see that she would hurt herself if she continued.

“Marley,” Rachel said evenly, trying not to let the panic seep into her voice. “Marley.”

She kept her voice mindfully low, careful not to shout. Marley was outright sobbing, unable to move so much, just weakly kicking at the nurses and swatting at them before curling up as much as she could with healing ribs and making herself as small as possible. 

“Y’ can’t make me…” Marley was sobbing, her jaw unable to open all the way and her face contorted with pain even as she talked and breathed and- Rachel’s heart ached because Marley was so scared and probably in so much pain. She couldn’t even shake her head. “N-nuh. No.”

Rachel didn’t know how to help- she was more used to people unable to move, staring at the ceiling with no will to live. Finn seemed to have an idea of what to do, shifting closer to Marley.

“It’s Finn,” he whispered. “I’m not going to put you in there. I’m right here, in the open, where you can see me.”

Marley’s blue eyes locked onto him, and Rachel just felt her heart shatter. 

_ This life is not fair. _

“See?” Finn swatted at the air around him. “Open space. Spacey. Lots of space. Here. Use your arm… wave it around.” He did it again to demonstrate.

Marley hesitantly raised her uncasted hand, waving it around before quickly pulling it back to herself. She whimpered. Finn quickly changed tactics, coming a little closer and hesitantly sitting next to her. Rachel marvelled at how Finn was doing, as he carefully directed Marley’s attention on him.

“Focus on me. If the room was small, I wouldn’t fit in it, huh?” Finn joked, and Marley’s sobbing lessened a little and she was no longer looking terrified, probably seeing Finn as safety. “Hey. You’re safe now. Me and Rachel and your mom are here, right here in this room, the Glee Club is right down the hallway with a couple of police officers talking to the alumni and Sebastian. You know Santana, she’s probably kicking their ass into next Tuesday, right?” Finn continued. Marley nodded slightly, and Finn grinned at the response. “Yeah… and-and uh, I did good in college, I’m getting my degree, I’m doing pretty well…” Finn kept talking, but it was clear that he was running out of things to say.

Since Marley couldn’t speak, she had to focus on something else. Ah, Rachel’s voice would do. But for once, she didn’t know what to say.

So she sang.

_ “Twinkle twinkle little star… how I wonder what you are…” _

Finn joined in.

_ “Up above the world so high… like a diamond in the sky… twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are…” _

And it was a couple of repetitions of this, that Marley’s fear had ebbed away. But she was still sobbing, and neither Finn nor Rachel could detect the point where her tears went from fear to self-deprecating. Both of them shared a glance, and then wrapped Marley in a gentle hug.

She felt Marley freeze in surprise at first, tremble as if expecting to be crushed, and then renewed sobbing. One hand snaked out to pull Rachel closer and clutch at her shirt as if it was a lifeline, and Marley broke down.

“I’m sorry,” Rachel said, mostly because… what could she say? What did someone say to a situation as tragic as Marley’s?

Finn didn’t say a word, merely pulled them both closer, rubbing Rachel’s back gently, probably feeling her ache over Marley. Sometimes, Rachel forgot what it was like to ache and empathise with others- and it was frustrating because at the times when she did, it came in excess. Slowly, between them and the nurses, they carefully guided Marley to her room, where Blaine, Kurt, Sebastian and Santana stood.

Marley was trembling, refusing to look at the others, curled up as much as she could onto Rachel, refusing to let go. Rachel had stumbled awkwardly as they brought her back. Her face was blotchy and red. 

“Why is Younger But Taller Rachel crying?” Santana softly demanded, aware that rising voices would just trigger the three people in the shooting.

Finn just looked utterly confused by Santana’s nickname. Sebastian and Blaine go to Marley immediately, the latter wanting to go on and on and on about superheroes. With a bit of difficulty, the boys managed to detach Marley from Rachel, but her fists opened and closed as if she needed something tangible to hold on to. Sebastian looked hesitant, as if he would actually snap Marley into literal two, but Blaine just hugged Marley, sitting on her bed and propping her up, letting her lean onto him and hugging her.

“How do you know what to do?” Kurt asked.

“People just wanna be hugged sometimes,” Blaine explained, letting Marley rest her full weight on him, which was not a lot. 

“People crave touch,” Rachel said softly as Marley curled her one good arm around Blaine. “She was claustrophobic. They were about to put her in the MRI machine.”

“I’m going to slap the shit out of them- Britt doesn’t like tight spaces either, and she mentioned to me that they tried to put her in one too.”

“Santana, no-” Rachel and Kurt looked more exasperated with Santana than angry. The four of them shifted away from the trio, who were talking about superheroes and comics.

“We have to find some way to help them, none of this is working,” Finn huffed. “They’re arguing and fighting and we need to find a way for them to work through it and together.”

“Which was why I came up with the idea of having them all live temporarily in the rented house for a while,” Santana rebuffed.

“Don’t you think they need space?” Kurt asked.

“Think of it as family bonding,” Santana shrugged. “I’m also not too happy with the fact that those motherfuckers were never caught. I’d like to keep everyone together for a while and that’s that.”

“Is that what the police said?” Kurt asked.

“Yeah. They really, really wanted Marley or Blaine to say a statement, but Sebastian and I flat out told them no… they were not in the best condition to give one. I mean, seriously! Artie almost rammed an officer because he accidentally showed his gun! Mr. Fight Club looked like he wanted to fight those cops on behalf of Tina even though he shoved her like three seconds beforehand! You really think any of them are in the right position to give a statement?”

“They didn’t catch the shooters,” Finn said, slowly. “Do the others know that?”

“I’d rather they not,” Santana said uncomfortably. “Only Mr. Schue knows, since he’s an adult. They’re scared, I don’t want to scare them any further. I think Britt knows, since they went to her for a separate statement… I don’t like it, I told her to keep whatever she knows to herself in case she doesn’t actually know. But Mr. Garbler there,” Santana hissed, gesturing at Sebastian, “thinks we should tell the truth and scare them even more.”

“The thing is, they  _ are  _ going to ask eventually,” Rachel murmured softly. “They’ll be suspicious why a trial never happened, because they’re going to want to know that their attackers have been sent to jail. Because, let’s not kid ourselves here, Marley is going on that podium as a witness along with Sebastian. We all know that. And we all know that in a show of support we’ll be there for her and anyone else who’s called as a witness. If that doesn’t happen… they’re going to know and  _ then  _ they’ll be more scared… and not just that, they’ll be downright furious with us because we knew and didn’t tell them.”

“Yeah, but if you tell them now?” Santana argued back. “After the pain is still raw and they’re still so scared? Is that a better option, Berry?”

“Santana’s right. They’re scared, and maybe we shouldn’t tell them. What they don’t know won’t hurt them, and the next time they’ll probably hear about it, by then the police would have caught them. They’ll be angry, but we’ll prevent a crisis on our hands at the moment with everyone freaking out,” Kurt said.

“Looks like Finn-boy is the deciding factor,” Santana said.

“Wait, we’re counting Sebastian’s opinion?” Kurt asked.

“Number one, he’s our point man for Marley and our greatest ally at the moment. Number two, the bitch is his brother… of course his opinion matters here. Number three, Lady Hummel, in case you haven’t noticed, he’s made his opinion perfectly clear, so unless your math is wrong, one plus one equals two, right?” Santana turned to Finn. “You gotta swing the vote.”

“Shouldn’t the other alumni know?” Finn asked weakly.

“Then the people who aren’t supposed to know will know, thus erasing the point of this vote in the first place.” Santana folded her arms. “What’s it going to be, hotshot?”

“I-I…” Finn swallowed hard, looking away from his ex-fiancee, step-brother and Santana Lopez. 

(Yes, he defines Santana as her own person, with no labels like friend or girl he slept with because holy cheesus, she is one intimidating woman to not need her own label.)

Instead, he focused on Marley, Sebastian and Blaine, the Warbler reading from his phone and reading a Spiderman and Deadpool comic, with Sebastian taking Deadpool’s voice and Blaine taking Spiderman’s voice, and alternating different voices in reading the different speech bubbles as Sebastian painted exaggerated versions of the scenes, often getting up to do mock hero poses and animated versions of what was happening in the comic, with Blaine making horrible impersonations of the yellow and white boxes, pulling a smile from Marley.

“... and then Deadpool takes the webshooter, and promises to return it!” Sebastian exclaimed, shooting a webshooting pose.

“You promised that last time, Deadpool!” Blaine groaned, pulling his best impression of Spiderman. He didn’t move, just giving Marley all the comfort and hugs she needed as she chuckled softly. “What happened to my last one?”

“... BAMF-ed into Dormammu’s Dark Dimension the last time we were there-” Sebastian carelessly waved his hand, as if he was Deadpool at the moment, but Blaine cut in. All three of them knew they were wildly deviating from the actual comic, but all of them found it too funny to care.

“We,  _ we.  _ He uses the royal  _ ‘we _ ’,” Blaine scoffed. 

“Yeah, we! Because we’re probably the best bromance in this history of comic books! Sorry, Cable, but you’re my BBF.”

“I thought it was BFF?”

“NOOooo… BBF! Badass Best Friend!” Sebastian finished with a grin, and Marley laughed softly.

“Uh-huh… and what am I?”

“UuuuUUUH… BSRBFICWTSKLITAS.”

“That’s… a mouthful of letters…”

“I know! It means Badass Spider Romantic Boy Friend I Can’t Wait To Spiderman Kiss Like In The Amazing Spiderman!”

Finn watched Marley laugh and comment softly on the joke, eyes shining with a small bit of hope and happiness, before turning back to the others. He looked at Blaine, who was fully in character, giving an exasperated eyeroll and finally going back on the track of the comic. He could see the smile pulling at the edges of his lips, however, a contrast to his screaming when Finn came in.

“Don’t tell them. Santana’s right, I-I can’t take this moment away from them, now that they’re finally settling down even just a little bit.”

Rachel looked crushed, as she looked over at Marley and saw how happy she was with Blaine and Sebastian, before sighing. “Fine. Majority wins. We don’t tell them. I just hope it doesn’t blow up in our faces…”

“The police’ll catch them, not to worry.” But even Santana sounded unsure of that statement.

Finn put his hands in his pockets, hiding his extremely trembling hands, blinking. He was so tired… and his body ached, and he sniffed, feeling like his nose was blocked. His heart was palpitating, that he could hear it in his ears, so he focused on Rachel instead. Santana’s statement went over his head as he swallowed hard, feeling beads of sweat drip down his forehead. He had been feeling it for the entire day, the entire time… it was just making itself present in this quiet moment.

His mind went hazy for a moment, as Rachel noticed him staring.

“Finn? Are you alright?”

He couldn’t catch the statement at first, as Kurt looked at him in worry.

“Finn?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m alright.” Finn could hear himself saying, but he felt like he was out of it, out of his body.

Then he was snapped back into reality by Kurt elbowing him, hard.

“None of us said anything, Finn. You just zoned out and said you were fine… are you though? Rachel, did you say anything?”

“No, I didn’t.”  _ He must have imagined it.  _ “Finn, maybe you’re just tired from the flight. You should get back and get some rest. We’re planning to persuade the others to go home and freshen up and rest at least for the night.”

“N-no… I wanna stay and help…” Finn offered weakly, trying to shake himself out of it.

“Finn, everyone needs to rest. I know you’re worried about Marley, but the rest of the Glee club needs our help too. At the moment, it’s fine. If something happens, I can call the nurse. Okay?”

“Okay…” He exhaled. “Okay.”

And then Marley screamed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I split this chapter into two cause it was getting longgggg
> 
> Comment down below! I love reading comments.
> 
> Someone draw a picture with Melissa and Grant in their superhero costumes, but also wearing their respective blazers from their schools please? (For Melissa, like, think S6 blazer with the ND and Warbler merge and Grant in the original Warbler blazer.)
> 
> But bonus if someone can draw Grant as adorable version of Deadpool and Darren as constantly exasperated Spiderman.
> 
> This chapter meant to come out in the weekend, then writer's block and exams hit me like a truck.
> 
> exams... help.
> 
> (also, sorrynotsorryfortheending...)


	8. Chapter 8: Wilde-fire/Chang-e Your Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marley is absolutely broken. Kitty, Tina and Brittany talk about why they did what they did. Mike grapples with racist comments directed at the group by a stranger. Finn, Rachel, Santana and Sebastian get a crackdown of Marley's condition. The New Directions go to the place Santana rented out and have their first night together. Finn and Rachel talk. Joe struggles with being disowned and turns to Quinn for help. Finn's acting weird, and it makes Sebastian and Rachel wonder... 
> 
> The God squad prepare for a mission to help Joe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This post was made by the #BlackLivesMatter gang. :) Trigger warning for racist slurs.
> 
> Yo, angry Mike isn't something we see enough of on the show, and we don't see racism addressed as it should be. It must be done. I was going to do this eventually with Mercedes and Unique, but I felt like a bit needed to be addressed now, at this moment. That and they need to talk about their behaviour towards other people in the show. Dude, they MURDERED Tina's character like wtf wtfwtfwtf...
> 
> BRITTANY ISN'T STUPID, SHE'S REALLY OBSERVANT AND SHE HATES IT WHEN PEOPLE SAY THAT SHE IS. She's no dumb blonde, she's not as callous or bitchy as the show makes her out to be (especially at All or Nothing the episode. Yo, Britt would have backbone, but she won't have that backbone). She is actually pretty caring, she just doesn't know how to put it in words. I hc her as autistic, a very high functioning one.
> 
> Quinn and Puck are great cooks. There has to be a chef somewhere in Glee club!

Marley screamed, because it felt like an unreachable pain from within her head, a sudden sharp headache that made her feel like a nuclear bomb had exploded inside her. Her voice came out slurry and she could not garble out a single coherent word, half her vision going dark as everything swam before her eye. Everything  _ hurt,  _ but strangely she found it more surprising than feeling like it was the worst pain in the world because she had felt worse.

She had felt worse and it sucked.

She could feel the comforting arms slip away from around her, panicked voices that made zero sense to her. They were shouting unknown syllables that seemed so familiar, like she knew their meanings at the tip of her tongue, but it hurt to think, it hurt to breathe, it hurt to do anything and maybe, not for the first time, she wished she was dead… or how easy it was to stop breathing, stop  _ existing.  _

“It hurts…” she was saying, between painful sobs and sharp, stabbing breaths. “I want to die.”

_ I want to die. _

_ I can’t breathe. _

_ Everything hurts. _

_ Make it stop. _

_ I want to die. _

But her words were slurred, bleeding into each other. The noises were increasing in intensity, and fading. Every bit of stimuli was sending daggers into her brain, voices constantly flowing in and out, and it was all too much, her brain was registering everything as a threat, and the walls were closing in- and she needed it to stop, stop, stop.

“Stop!”

Her body was screaming its fight or flight response, but she was too broken to move, too many injuries to move as flashes of lights came on, the room temperature alternating between hot and cold as the walls closed in. People, faces, wild eyes, questions, machines. Half of her body was not working, she needed to run- run- run-

She was screaming, shouting incoherently that words bled into one another as she gasped painfully for air, hyperventilating. Black dots appeared in the edges of her vision and it sent her brain into overdrive, sending alarm bells through her mind as all the nurses reached for her, poking her, touching her, crowding her, putting something on her face. She was still screaming, clawing the thing away from her face, heart pounding loudly in her ears as everything was messed up in a blur of colors, and she can’t run, she can’t run- she needed to escape-

She did a painful lurch to the side, that sent fire up her body and she let out one deathly scream, black taking over her vision as her body began to shut itself down. She tilted headfirst off the side of her bed, hitting the floor with a silent thud as she mercifully passed out.

Sebastian was a little too slow to catch her, lunging forward and shoving a nurse to the side. Those precious few seconds allowed him a view of Marley hitting the ground shoulder-first.

“Marley!” Santana and Rachel came to his side in a heartbeat, with Finn demanding what the hell was going on with anger barely anyone had seen- except when Quinn was revealed to have had a baby with Puck.

Blaine had stood stock still in the corner, where he had launched himself to as Marley screamed. He was staring with wide eyes at his hands, as if expecting himself to see her blood yet again on his hands.

“Not again…” Blaine whispered, sinking down to the floor. “Not again, not again, not again… I didn’t do anything… why can’t I protect anyone…? Why can’t I- I need…”

Kurt sat down next to Blaine, who was trembling badly. “Blaine, Blaine, it’s okay. It’s okay.”

“N-no…” Blaine sobbed, tears spilling free, as Kurt pulled him into a hug, letting Blaine’s head rest on his shoulder as he sobbed into his shirt. “I can’t… I can’t…”

“Blaine, breathe,” Kurt whispered, rubbing his back.

Rachel quickly turned to the door, where Jake was standing.

“She’s my girlfriend- I should see her!” Jake snapped, and Finn was stopping him.

“That’s enough- enough!” Finn shoved him back. “She passed out. You need to calm down- calm down!”

Jake struggled against Finn, trying desperately to get past him towards Marley, who he saw was being lifted by the nurses onto a stretcher and being wheeled out. He struggled past Finn, only to be stopped by Santana, who was a literal immovable rock wall.

“Jake.” 

“Let me see her!” Jake shouted desperately, as Sebastian and Rachel came up behind him.

“She needs to be treated, you need to calm down before you see her, just- calm down!” Finn snapped, trying to contain Jake in his arms, lifting him off of the floor and putting him back in front of Sebastian and Rachel, with Puck running down the hallway. 

“Hey man, you need to chill-” Sebastian put a hand on Jake’s shoulder, and he spun right around and smashed his fist into Sebastian’s face, forcing the Warbler to stumble back in absolute shock and pain, hand flying up to his nose to realize it was already bleeding. “Dude… what the fuck?”

“Let go, Finn!” Jake snarled, when Finn caught his wrist before he would punch blindly, not noticing that he would have hit Rachel since she pulled Sebastian back behind her.

“Stop. It.”

“Hey!” Puck shouted, grabbing his step-brother by the shoulder. “What the hell was that for? You practically pummelled Mike and Ryder and ran out here. Hey, hey-! Knock it off!” Puck restrained Jake from moving any further. “Yeah, I get it, we hate the Warblers for what they did, blah bitty blah blah blah but that doesn’t mean you should give them a shiner especially when they’re trying to help!”

“Let me see Marley!” Jake shouted back.

“She’s not here, jackass!” Santana countered, with Rachel looking over the scene worriedly. Sebastian looked pissed, holding a hand to his nose. “Calm your tits!”

“Jake,” Rachel tried. “Calm down. The nurses might, nay, will bar you from seeing her if you throw yourself into hysterics.”

“But Blaine?” Jake protested.

“Blaine didn’t attack anyone,” Puck pointed out, feeling his brother slowly stop resisting. “You punched Ryder and knocked over Mike to get here.”

“Oh my God, are they okay?” Rachel asked.

“Ryder’s steaming- I’m more surprised he didn’t punch Unique in the face,” Puck huffed. “Jake, stop!”

“Get off!” Jake struggled again, breaking loose of Puck’s arms and lunging forward, dodging Finn.

“Rachel, watch out!” Sebastian warned, yanking Rachel back as Jake collided with the wall, barely missing Rachel. Santana marched over, since neither Puck nor Finn could control the younger Puckerman, and grabbed Jake’s ear, hauling him up on his feet by the ear.

“Listen up, Pucker- I mean,  _ younger  _ Puckerman,” Santana snapped, holding him up by the ear, with him yelping repeatedly. “You need to calm your ass down before the police come and slap cuffs on you, and then the only way you can see Marley is through bars and not in person. Wouldn’t want that, would you, Shawshank?”

(All Rachel sees when she looks back at this moment several years later is Jake standing in the rain. Stormy, thunderous clouds rolling overhead. It would be months, maybe a year after this moment, but she’ll forever link it with Santana holding him up by the ear. She’d describe it as her metaphorically holding him up by his ear.

“Why the hell did you do that?” Rachel snapped.

“Marley deserved better!” 

“You think we don’t know that?” Rachel shouted back. “You think Finn and I, we don’t know that? You think Sebastian, Unique, Kitty, Blaine and Kurt… the others don’t know that? None of what you did helped! In fact, it made everything worse. It made all of this worse! And now- it’s all wrong! Now Marley’s- just-” Rachel choked back a sob. “Jake- come back. Just… come back.”)

“Fine,” Jake spat, shrugging Santana off. “Fine.”

Meanwhile, Tina had escaped the others talking about taking everyone back for everyone to move in. She quickly made her way down the hallway, to Kitty and Brittany’s room. Sam looked up, smiling at her, but it looked weird and strained. 

“Hey.”

“Hey, Sam… Kitty, Brittany.” Tina eyed the gigantic machine in the corner, with Kitty. 

“It’s a dialysis machine,” Kitty said, softly. “Just ignore it.”

“We fucked up,” Tina said softly. “We fucked up so badly.”

Kitty looked uncomfortable, looking away. “Is that all?”

Tina looked bothered by Kitty’s lack of reaction. “Why aren’t you more guilty?”

“Tina, maybe you should back off,” Brittany suggested, Kitty’s face crumpling further, she was trying to hide the tears welling up in her eyes.

Tina folded her arms. “Why am I the only one getting all the heat? You were the main one! The main bully!”

“Tina,” Sam warned as Kitty wrapped her arms around herself.

“I didn’t mean for it to get that bad…” Kitty whispered, shaking. “I- I… I just wanted for someone to feel the same pain I feel…”

“She always carried a pain, Kitty,” Brittany said.

“Why didn’t you stop it?”

“Would you? Could I?” Brittany asked. “You wouldn’t believe me anyways.”

“Brittany, no,” Sam protested.

“But you participated, the Sandra Dee song, the taunting, the everything…” Kitty said, confused.

“You thought I did, but I didn’t. I was trying to figure out what to say,” Brittany said softly. “I know that I could hurt her really badly, so I waited a long time trying to figure out what to say. But the words won’t come. And I can’t tell you because I’m not her. And you wouldn’t believe me that she needed help.” She wrung her hands. “You would have called me stupid like everyone else.”

“Britt, we wouldn’t…” 

“It’s okay,” Brittany said, simply, looking down. “I think she’s wonderful.”

“She just seems so perfect and pretty and good, I didn’t really think that she would be suffering on her own and now I added onto that,” Kitty admitted.

“Did she tell you she transferred before?” Sam asked. “Like, why?”

“She transferred?” Kitty asked.

“Like you, yes,” Tina said uncomfortably. “But no one really said why, not even her. I thought it was because her mom got a job at McKinley.”

Sam frowned slightly. “She never said why?”

“No, it’s weird.” Tina looked down, before she looked up abruptly. “This isn’t another Kurt case, is it?”

Brittany didn’t look away. “Seems worse.”

“We know why  _ you _ transferred, Kitty,” Sam said. 

“No you don’t,” Kitty shot back. “I didn’t tell you the real reason why I transferred. I lied.” Kitty’s voice broke. “I got bullied into transferring. It’s… just easier that way.”

“Oh…” Everyone was taken aback. 

“A- and I thought… what could be worse than being bullied to switch schools, right? She seemed so happy when she just transferred, she wanted to make friends, be that optimistic girl- I wanted to  _ be  _ that again. I didn’t know it would get that bad… I didn’t know it was already bad to begin with, in the first place.”

“That wasn’t an excuse, anyways,” Will said, standing at the door. He had materialized at the door, looking hesitant to come in.

“Did you know, Mr. Schue?” Tina asked.

Will looked past Tina for a moment, guilt crossing his face. “After she joined Glee.. I did. I learned the real reason why she transferred schools. I already knew why you transferred in the first place, Kitty. Case has been resolved.”

“I’m… not going back there.”

“But if you knew, why didn’t you do anything?” Tina asked. “What was it, anyways?”

“She should be the one to tell you, not me.” Will gripped the door until his knuckles turned white.

“No, no more hiding. No more secrets,” Sam said, standing. “We are kicking all our demons in the ass, starting from Marley.”

“Guys…” Will sighed. “It’s not that easy. Marley has brain damage, she has seizures, she can’t read, can’t write.”

“You didn’t answer Tina’s question, Mr. Schue,” Brittany piped up. “Why didn’t you do anything?”

“I don’t have an excuse for that,” Will sighed, running his hands through his hair. “I just thought she was really fine. I thought you all were fine.”

(It was a flimsy excuse, they all knew it. There were many times they were all obviously not fine. With Sam, with Marley, with Kitty, hell even with Sugar and Joe. Everybody had their low points, but it wasn’t hard to assume that they’d bounce back. Will had to trust his students sometime, but there were certain times he shouldn’t have.

They were too young.

He should have seen it when they argued after Sectionals, the outcasting. Truth be told, he was angry at Marley too, he let the Nationals trophy the year before get to his head.

He hated that it did.)

“Marley likes stars… she has that in common with Rachel,” Brittany said randomly, as if stating a silly memory she had with either of them. She smiled at the wall, at nobody in particular. “She likes the Aquila constellation, because it reminded her of Harry Potter’s Thunderbirds. The star Finn named after himself… is actually part of this constellation.”

“Okay…” Will said slowly. Tina just looked sad by this information.

“I like stars too… I wish I could talk more with her about them,” Tina said softly, before taking a deep breath. “I was scared I’d get sidelined again, left to the side like last time with Rachel, left in the background like always… but the one time I finally get it, the one time I finally do…” Tina looked up at the others. “... I hurt somebody else badly.”

“I’m sorry,” Will said, because Tina  _ had _ been sidelined a lot. Tina and the others were suffering through so much pain and he as a teacher had failed to help them.

Tina shook her head. “No, Mr. Schue, I was sad and lonely and I felt abandoned, but that’s not me. I’m trying so hard to be someone I’m not, when all along I’m just being a massive dick to everybody around me. But like you said, it’s not an excuse, is it? We all don’t have good excuses for what we did to everyone else around us, not just Marley… so for starters… I want to apologize,” Tina exhaled, turning to Brittany. “I’m sorry for the times I called you stupid, a dumb blonde stereotype, a bitch, retarded, anything like that. I’m sorry that I ignored you whenever you actually had a good idea or was just trying to be helpful. I know your past as a Cheerio may have painted my views negatively, and I’m  _ sorry.  _ I’m so sorry for every bitchy thing I did because I didn’t understand you and didn’t bother to.”

Brittany, having been taken aback, blinked, though tears were rising in her eyes and threatened to spill over, hands shaking. “Tina, you don’t have to-”

“But I  _ have  _ to,” Tina insisted. “Because it’s killing me. Before I don’t get to say it anymore, I want you all to know. I’m sorry. I’m just… sorry.”

“Tina…” Sam and Will wrapped Tina in a hug as she broke down into tears. “We’re sorry, too.”

The nurse poked her head in, suddenly. She smiled gently. “Visiting hours are over- we can allow one person to stay in each room.”

“I’m staying,” Sam said quickly, squeezing Brittany’s hand. “Tina, are you?”

“No- I have to apologize to everyone,” Tina muttered, wiping her tears away. “And the whole house thing. I have to help out.”

Will closed his eyes. “This conversation is over, for now, but I think it’s better if we’re all here to talk about it.”

Everyone agreed, and they encountered Mike, who was standing outside with the keys to the van. He seemed pretty tired, as he stuffed his hands in his pockets, waiting for Will and Tina to come out. Emma was down the hallway talking to Unique. Santana had ultimately steered Jake to go with the others back to the rented house, with herself, Finn and Rachel staying. Sebastian was reluctantly invited to stay in the New Direction home for a while, but he had said that he was probably overstepping a lot of boundaries in doing so. He was very reluctant to leave, since he had school, but he had promised to come by and visit, especially since the Warblers were also temporarily disbanded. He had a lot of free time on his hands.

Kurt was gently coaxing Blaine into the vehicle, patient and sweet. Mike would take a few trips back and forth to take everyone. Everyone had agreed Blaine would be the first to go otherwise it would take forever for everyone to pry him away. Everyone noted that Kurt’s face had stress lines and screamed worry, and that it wasn’t from Blaine. Everyone noted that Santana, Finn and Rachel weren’t present to see them off.

Next was Jake, because Jake was stressed and tired and aggressive. Santana had repeatedly mentioned that he would see Marley in the morning, and that it would all be okay. No one commented on the fact that she was saying it as if she was repeating it for herself to believe. 

Quinn volunteered to go on the next batch, allowing Puck to be with his brother.

Mike nodded to himself as he quietly got everybody organized, who was going with who. A man arrived, looking disheveled and dirty and rough. He hummed, looking over the group as Puck tried to manhandle his brother into the van, with Mercedes trying to persuade Jake to let go.

“Niggers.”

The racist comment made Mike’s head snap back around towards the stranger. 

_ God, not now. Not now!  _

“Leave them alone,” Mike said. “They had a rough day.”

“Stupid niggers,” the man snorted and Mike resisted the urge to just punch him in the face. “And dirty communist.”

“Leave us alone, man,” Puck growled, finally pushing his brother into the van. “We’re not bothering anybody.”

Unique was shying behind Mercedes now, afraid of another fight, of something ready to explode into violence. Mike stood tall between them and the man. “Please, don’t.”

“What are you gonna do about it, huh, China face?” the man shoved Mike back. 

“I will not ask you again. Leave us alone. We mean no harm to you. At all. Ever.” Mike stepped forward, against the man. “We’re done talking.”

“Tch, whatever did my daughter even see in you losers?” the man scoffed. Mike’s nostrils flared at that statement, but he made no move as Puck came to stand behind him, ready to bring up backup if needed. Jake had stepped out of the van too. “At least they could have shot the black people, it’s not that they’re hard to miss in a bright room.”

Unique gasped slightly. Mike drew back his fist and punched the man across the face, rage boiling in his veins. “Don’t you dare-!”

“Mike!” Puck grabbed Mike’s arms, restraining him from decking the man even further. “Let it go, he’s just being an ass.”

“Fuck that! We were lucky it wasn’t a hate crime,” Mike snapped. “You don’t ever speak that way about black people.”

“They’re not people! They’re dumbasses.”

“Sir, I think you’re drunk and high and I suggest that you go home right  _ now. _ ” This from Ryder, stepping up. “We are just on our way home, and we think you should do the same.”

Ryder was right, they could smell the alcohol from a mile away.

“Niggers going to be the next shooter or criminal, I’m telling you!” He laughed as Mercedes directed Unique into the van, trying to pull Jake in. “Just watch that man! He looks like he’s gonna fuck all the bitches in the city! Man, I feel sorry for the nigga’s girlfriend.”

He was pointing at Jake, who had stormed over. Okay, maybe indirectly referencing Marley was not a good idea. Puck looked torn between restraining Jake or Mike. Ryder wasn’t any help, stalking closer like a predator about to pounce.

“Say another word and I swear to God-” Ryder didn’t finish his sentence before the man snorted.

“You have two of those ‘independent black women’ as well,” he snorted. “Or man- like one of those cross-dressers. Aw you look alike too. Are you sisters? You don’t need no man so you dress up like a girl? Sissy. Stupid sissy nigga.”

“None of this is cool!” Mike snapped, breaking free and shoving the man against the wall, beginning a struggle. Jake was held back by his brother as Mike continued to beat the shit out of the stranger, with Ryder and Joe holding him back as he was yanked off. “Don’t you dare repeat that word, you understand?”

“Mike!” Ryder snapped. “Let him be. We don’t need more violence.” Letting his voice turn softer, he whispered in Mike’s ear. “We can’t unsee the violence. Please don’t make us see more.”

Mike got off of him, wringing out his hands as he spat blood into the ground next to the man’s head.

“Hey, c’mon dude,” Joe whispered. “Let’s go and get everybody safe at the ND house.”

“ND house?”

“New Directions house. Easier to say.”

Mike was very, very quiet on the first ride. He gripped the steering wheel so hard Puck was so sure it would break. Mercedes and Unique had followed along.

“You think Quinn is going to be okay dealing with the others alone?”

“I’m not letting Mercedes back there,” Mike said tersely. 

And true to his word, he comes back with the rest minus Finn, Santana and Rachel. They needed to sort out their belongings, with Joe hovering awkwardly in the background to talk to Quinn. Puck busied himself in the kitchen, making a batch of something that smelled delicious. Mike had gone up to his room. Apparently they had to share rooms too. Artie and Mike shared a room. Puck and Jake shared a room. Kurt and Blaine shared a room. Santana and Tina shared a room (the she-devil threat to Tina hadn’t quite left her mind yet), Sam and Brittany shared a room, Quinn and Kitty shared a room, Joe and Sugar shared a room, Mercedes and Unique shared a room. It went unsaid how no one trusted Marley to sleep alone, so Rachel would be her roommate. Finn had claimed the last room with Ryder. 

“Quinn,” Joe started. “I… have a question.”

“What is it?”

“How does one…” Joe wrung his fingers. “How does one go about being disowned?”

Quinn’s gaze softened. “I don’t think there’s any good way. Honestly, you might need to recover more from the shock and decide what you want to do from here on out.”

“But… they’re my parents,” Joe whispered. “Why and how would they do this?”

Quinn sighed. “Some parents, they’re mean, they’re bad. Sometimes they don’t have a reason. The world is unfair, people are selfish.”

“I wish they weren’t.”

“They can’t help it, people do these things all the time.” Quinn smiled at him. “It’s what makes us imperfect. We’re all selfish in a way. And prideful.”

“But they’re my family.”

“You make your own family.” When Joe gave her a funny look, Quinn quickly reamended herself. “Family comes from the bonds you’ve made, not the blood. Family is love. God is love.”

“You mean like this?” Joe pointed out Blaine sitting next to Unique and throwing an arm around her shoulders, letting her sob into him as Kurt returned with Mamma Mia that he no doubt swiped from Rachel and blankets. Artie looked so depressed, but Tina sat next to him and offered him a warm hot chocolate and he smiled slightly, throwing an arm around Tina’s waist and hugging her. Jake and Puck were in the kitchen making food. Ryder was snoozing against Mercedes, who was laughing while watching Mike and Sugar bickered about how they were supposed to set up the TV.

“... like that, yes.” Quinn smiled. Everyone let out a groan when they saw Kurt holding up Mamma Mia.

“I’d rather watch Footloose,” Mike grumbled.

“... yeah, sorry Mike… we kinda did a Footloose number without you.”

Mike laughed, and everything felt weirdly… normal. 

Why did it feel normal?

Quinn watched Kurt press a kiss to Blaine’s forehead as if it was normal, with Tina sitting on the floor by Artie’s feet. It looked weird. Everything was weird, it left a lump in Quinn’s throat.

“Is it bad that I want to stay here?” 

“Kind of the whole point of the house,” Quinn laughed.”Do you have your things? Everyone here kind of asked their parents or somebody to drop off things here.”

“No,” Joe said awkwardly. “But I do miss my guitar.”

“I think I know what to do now.”

“What?”

Quinn’s eyes twinkled mischievously. “We’re going to get your things.”

Meanwhile, Finn and Rachel stood in front of Marley’s room. Sebastian had gone off to get coffee for both of them, since it was going to be a long night. Santana had gone to see Brittany, Sam and Kitty. All of them were tense.

(“It was a blood clot- it almost became a stroke.”)

There was still an elephant in the room, however, between Rachel and Finn.

“We’re endgame. You and I both know that,” Rachel said softly. She wasn’t sure why she was talking about it now, when Marley could be dead, but the words couldn’t help but spill over.

Finn was still sweating, eyes unfocused, but they snapped back at Rachel. She was hesitant, but frowning at the fact that his hands were shaking and he was sweating an obscene amount. 

“... Finn? Are you okay?”

“Y-yeah, I’m fine. Just peachy… except for the whole y’know, shooting thing.”

“Finn, maybe you should have headed back with them-”

“I’m fine.” He probably wouldn’t be able to sleep properly anyways, despite being tired as fuck. He didn’t need his roommate questioning him. “But why are you bringing it up again now?”

“Because it’s causing this weird tension between us and I don’t like it,” Rachel said. “I miss the ease of us talking and feeling like the world was ours together. Feeling like we could do anything and everything together. I miss you,” Rachel admitted. 

“Rachel…” 

“I miss you, Finn, and I get why you had to set me free then, but… Finn, I love you. And maybe we didn’t have the best of starts, but… we can start again, take it slow this time. I want you, Finn, and I’ll wait for you.”

“Don’t you dare put your dreams on hold because of me,” Finn snapped. “You’re in New York, and I’m in Lima, Ohio, and Rachel, you can’t come back because you were always meant to be a star. You cannot throw that away for me.”

“I know,” Rachel smiled, taking Finn’s clammy hand. Internally, she frowned at the way it trembled under her touch and the goosebumps that broke out at contact. “But you’re home, Finn. And I’m not throwing my dreams away for you, I’m doing them for me, so that I can come back to you. Because you’re right. You and I are endgame. And while I’m achieving my dreams, you’re here, teaching and achieving  _ your _ dreams. And when our dreams finally come true… we’ll come home. Maybe not here, because every time I return here something bad happens, but… home. Out there.”

“With the New Directions,” Finn grinned, and Rachel had to laugh softly.

“With the New Directions.” 

“I didn’t expect this to happen… Marley came in and scolded me for fifteen minutes because I made you cry after Grease,” Finn laughed, almost embarrassingly. “Kitty wanted to fillet me after that because I was a terrible boyfriend. The newbies really wanted us together again, and so do the others. But the real applause has to be Santana, for Brody.”

Rachel sighed. “You beat him up.”

“He grabbed me first!”

They both smiled at each other, as Rachel traced aimless patterns on Finn’s hand.

“So… how are we doing this? Are we… dating again?” Rachel asked timidly.

“We’ll start as friends again, first.” Finn pulled her close into a hug, pressing a kiss to the crown of her hair. “We’ll just do this slow.”

“And we’ll do this the right way,” Rachel laughed, with tears in her eyes. “No love triangles, no love squares, no baby pregnancies, no competition with Vocal Adrenaline…”

Finn smiled sadly. “We’ll just need to take care of our family first.”

Family. Rachel quite liked the sound of that.

Sebastian and Santana cut them off, suddenly materializing beside them. “Not to interrupt your lovey-dovey make-up make out session, but we have a situation on our hands,” Santana interrupted.

“Wh- Santana-”

“No- that’s not-” Both of them practically flew away from each other, at the insinuation. Sebastian would have cackled, if the situation wasn’t so severe and urgent.

“Marley needs emergency surgery, and she has listed Finn as an emergency contact,” Sebastian said seriously. “Though in this case, I think you both are now her emergency contacts.”

“But her mom-?”

“Her mom’s not here,” Santana said through gritted teeth. “We all told her to go home and rest, and that if anything she trusts us to make the right decision.”

“What decision?”

“Oh my God, quarterback, keep up with the program!” Sebastian snapped. “Marley has a blood clot and it got worse, so they need to remove it NOW, but they need someone older to sign approval since she’s still a minor.”

“Y-yes?!” Rachel asked, alarmed, and Santana produced a clipboard she had been holding behind her back and a pen. 

“Do we have to read all of this?!” Finn asked, alarmed at the paragraphs and paragraphs of words. It seemed to blur together in his eyes, words swimming and jumping from letter to letter.

“Fucking sign it before she actually dies!” Santana screamed. “They can’t start the surgery without a signature!”

“Why didn’t you sign it?!” Rachel shouted back.

“Because, Miss Broadway Star, I’m not the one who made the promise and I’m not her emergency contact and-”

“Rachel,” Sebastian cut in, “she made you an emergency contact before she left in case something happened to her. As for me, I can’t sign it because I’m technically a minor, and it’s creepy because I just knew her today, so can you please, for the love of God, sign it?!” Sebastian screamed the last part as Rachel frantically scribbled her name on the empty spot, handing it to Finn who crazily signed his name with quivering fingers. Sebastian snatched the clipboard and zoomed down the hallway with Santana, Rachel and Finn in hot pursuit, practically colliding with the nurse as he handed her the clipboard.

“Here, they both signed, just go, go, do the surgery now!” Sebastian yelled in her face as all of them reached the OR doors slowly shutting as the nurse grabbed the clipboard and disappeared through them, the heart monitor barely heard as they closed.

_ Beep. _

“Did we make it?” Rachel asked, grabbing onto Finn, whose whole body was trembling.

_ Beep. _

“I don’t know,” Santana stressed. 

_ Beep. _

“God, I hope we did,” Finn said shakily, going in and out of focus. Sebastian gave him a side eye.

_ Beep. _

“I think the question now is… does she want to?” Sebastian asked.

_ Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted a snippet of Marley's backstory in this series. It's only a snippet, just a background to what happened beforehand. I'll do Kitty's next and Sebastian's. I honestly wrote Marley's backstory in a depressive state (and by pure accident, since I repeatedly forgot to take my antidepressants for several days beforehand), which is why it focuses so much on the bad.
> 
> After these two, I'll do Rachel's and Blaine's. All of them have interesting backstories. I might do a spinoff for Sebastian just before this. Like, an entire prequel with the Warblers and shit.
> 
> Can I just say the God squad is also friendship goals?
> 
> Anyone know what's wrong with Finn?
> 
> Comments are appreciated! I love reading comments, maybe 'cause I don't have a social life HA.
> 
> (i'm so sorry, marley)


	9. Chapter 9: Quinn-tessential People/Have a Hart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Something's wrong. The God squad launch a mission to take back Joe's stuff. Someone tags along. Millie comes with some stuff for Marley, but Rachel discovers that her past isn't all that it's cracked up to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SUGAR BE SPILLING SOME TEA. I picture her as very, very blunt, not very tactful. Very different from Santana, as I'm sure you've noticed. 
> 
> Also, I just noticed the Lea Michele drama going on, and I was super slow on the uptake, so I was like... 'huh'. Okay, so maaaaaybe the actress isn't good and the character as Glee has portrayed it isn't good, but you can pry this version of Rachel Berry from my cold, dead hands. This version of Glee needs good and pure characters to offset all the bad things that happened to them. Not perfect, but at least they're NICE and TOLERANT and REDEEMABLE-
> 
> Sorry, I'm just- I'm not okay. I'm just going through another one of those times, don't mind me.

Of course Sebastian was right. It depended solely on Marley whether she wanted to live. Santana couldn’t do anything about that.

But now as Santana stood outside, staring into the night sky, she wondered what the hell happened in the last 24 hours that her life was flipped upside down.

A call from Blaine turned out to be one of the most horrifying things she had heard. Santana shuddered at the alternative, which was a policeman calling. That would have been way more devastating- especially to Kurt, who had acknowledged that he still loved Blaine and then- it would shatter.

And Britt? Santana didn’t delude herself that she was still in love with her. Brittany had almost died. She had almost died and Santana didn’t even get to say ‘I love you’ back to her. She blinked at the sky and realized the stars looked very blurry, that she was crying. She raised a hand to touch her face, and sure enough, it came away wet. 

It felt like the past 24 hours had caught up to her.

_ Died.  _ That was a heavy word in her mouth.  _ Died.  _ She felt nauseated, tears rising as her shoulders shook, sobs racking her entire body. 

_ It wasn’t fair. _

She was the bitch, she was one of the biggest bullies of McKinley, but she wasn’t dealt this kind of crap. No, instead it was given to Britt- Brittany who was called stupid all her life. Brittany who was pretty and confident that she refused to succumb to Sue’s diet. Brittany who actually  _ cared,  _ and  _ saw. _

Santana’s sobs bubbled up faster as she sank against the hospital walls.

“DAMMIT!” she yelled into the air, but knowing that no one would hear her. “DAMMIT, DAMMIT!”

She picked up a lone rock, throwing it into a random direction in frustration. Santana was here now, but what can she do? Nothing. Nothing as she watches them helplessly shout for help and reach for her, and oh, Santana could reach out and try, but she can’t. 

And she hates it. She hates not being in charge of the situation, not being able to help. A laugh forced its way out of her throat, a low, self deprecating laugh followed by more sobs. She felt like she was all over the place, adrenaline wearing off from the emergency surgery scare. 

“There you are.”

It was the voice of Sebastian, as he sighed, probably judging her for the position she was in.

“Go away, Prince Charming,” Santana bit, but it had no venom or bite to it, it just sounded sad. “Not in the mood for a snark, as helpful as you’ve been today.”

“Actually,” Sebastian said, “I don’t come bringing snark, I came out here looking for you. Aren’t you cold?”

“My anger is probably enough to keep me warm,” Santana shot back, but she shivered anyways.

Sebastian put his hands in his pockets and raised an eyebrow at her. “Well, if you’re done stewing, you can come back in.”

“Why the hell did you come out here?” Santana snapped. “I thought Berry or Hudson would.”

“Oh, they would, but they’re either too busy sucking face or stressing about Marley and their new responsibilities,” Sebastian said simply. “That, and I had a feeling you’d be… all over the place.” He waved a hand at her.

“And you care why?” Santana scowled, scrubbing at her face, trying to erase the fact that she was crying despite the fact that Sebastian already saw her break down.

“Why ask if you’re gonna question me about it anyways?” Sebastian shot back. “I’m going to be honest. I get that I did bad things. But that’s not me anymore. And I’ve been in your position a few times before. You have to take my word for this, but all I’m asking is that you come inside.”

“That’s it?”

“Don’t want you to freeze. That would be a bitch to explain to everybody,” Sebastian grumbled, before his face softened just a tiny bit. “No one’s asking you to be the strong badass independent Hispanic woman that’s the pillar of support for everybody. You’re not expected to take that role all by yourself. You came here as a team, you do this together. Just as you help them, they help you. This goes two ways.”

“And this pep talk?” Santana asked, skeptically.

“I can’t help you, because you won’t let me. But there are people in there who can share your load,” Sebastian jerked a thumb back at the entrance. “So all I can do now is just ask you to come inside.”

Santana looked past him at the entrance, well lit. “That’s all you’re asking me?”

“That’s all. Unless you’d rather freeze to death out here?”

Santana looked at him for a few moments, before getting to her feet. She wobbled slightly, and Sebastian’s hand shot out to steady her.

“Thanks.”

“Gays of a feather, flock together.”

That, Santana had to laugh at. “You’re not half bad.”

Sebastian shrugged. “They say when I stepped down, I became much nicer. Even developed a funny bone.”

“You sound like you lived through this kind of shit.”

“I’m not sure it’s appropriate to put it in past tense,” Sebastian laughed nervously, but Santana got the hint anyways and she quickly bit her tongue, trying not to say any more. She may be a bitch but she knows there’s a limit. 

Both of them came into the view of Rachel and Finn, as Rachel sat on Finn’s lap, his arms around her and head on her shoulder, both of them humming a song. They looked  _ content,  _ and somehow Santana couldn’t find it in herself to say anything to ruin the moment, and neither did Sebastian. She did feel a twinge of jealousy, as she pursed her lips, turning away for a moment. Sebastian just nudged her shoulder, nodding to them.

They sat in relative silence. Sebastian doesn’t push her to talk to Rachel or Finn, and neither Rachel nor Finn outwardly asked Santana if she was okay. But somehow, she knows that if she needs to talk to them- they’re there. For all the shit she put them through, they’re still  _ there.  _

For now, the silence was enough, because their presence was enough to tell her that she was not alone, and maybe she didn’t have to be strong all the time. Maybe both of them have some inkling to what transpired or the inner turmoil within Santana that made her want to shout and scream and cry because none of this was  _ fair-  _ because Rachel reaches out to grab Santana’s hand.

This startled Santana, who looked at Rachel with surprise, then at Sebastian, who gave her an, ‘I told you so’ look. It made her tears bubble up again, and she gripped Rachel’s hand tightly.

Brittany was safe, at least. Brittany was stable. Sure, Santana may see her trading spit with Trouty Mouth, but at least she was alive and breathing and whole. 

Santana gritted her teeth, choking back sobs as she remembered that kid Marley, same girl who reminded her that good people still existed, not pure bitches like her or arrogant like Rachel or promiscuous like the old Puck, same girl whom Santana had a connection with despite getting off on the wrong foot at first.

Santana had originally found her a goody-two-shoes at first, Marley thought she was a bitch. The more Santana spent time with Marley, though, the more she liked the girl. They might not have much in common, but Marley looked up to Santana like a protective older sister. It flattered Santana- she knew Marley looked up to them, the alumni, especially Rachel and Finn, but Santana was drifting when they first met. Santana had no goal. Rachel had a goal. Finn was her teacher. Marley could talk dreams and future with Rachel and Finn, but when it came to the now and angry rants and the need for tough love, Marley went to Santana, because Lord knows that Rachel and Finn would coddle Marley.

Heck, if Santana had it her way, even she would coddle Marley sometimes. It was hard to miss the misery in her eyes that seemed to surge up and take over. Santana knows that pain, even if she’d never experienced it. She’d seen it before, after all. She had dealt it on others for so many times and maybe she was beginning to atone here and now- it felt like the universe’s way of mocking her, reminding her of the atrocious things she did before and she hated it. 

It was like the universe was saying, “Here! Get attached to this sweet girl and then have her suffer from many things and then have her slowly and forcibly ripped away from you because you did the same for others!”

She refocused on Brittany, because Brittany was safe and sound and happier and far more bittersweet but she didn’t care. It was better than thinking about Marley at the moment, because Marley was the ultimate symbol of guilt for the New Directions- and even the alumni were beginning to feel it. 

Marley was bitter. Brittany was bittersweet. Santana wanted to pick the lesser of two evils. So she picked Brittany, even though the blonde was what occupied her thoughts even before this whole debacle happened.

She really missed Brittany. Santana had spent days awake, a gnawing emptiness in her chest as she stared up at the ceiling in the Bushwick apartment. Kurt and Rachel had taken great care not to mention Brittany’s name around Santana in the early days of her living with them, because she would flare up at them. Brittany was associated with safety, and Santana would kill if she lost Brittany.

But at the same time, Brittany was also her guilt. Of all she lost, she lost her brightest light. She lost her person, she felt like, and while she knew the break up was logically the best decision, she loved Brittany and there were parts of her that were just screaming for her to come back, back to  _ her,  _ back to her arms. 

Brittany was bittersweet. Santana was so glad she didn’t die, because at least it meant that she was in still in her life even if it killed her to see her with Sam. Santana huffed out a breath, closing her eyes. At least Britt was safe… she felt herself relaxing, against her will, eyes slipping shut as she succumbed to sleep.

Meanwhile, Quinn, Joe and Mercedes had struck out on their mission to get Joe’s things.

“Okay, Joe, run me through on what they said,” Mercedes ordered. “Tell me what exactly what they said so I can give them a piece of my mind.”

“I…” 

“Bad idea to get angry while driving, guys!” Quinn snapped, as Mercedes swerved abruptly, forcing Quinn to close her eyes and swallow hard, remembering the car accident. Joe put a reassuring hand on her shoulder, grounding her to the present. “Mercedes, you are a terrible driver.”

“There was a reason why I take Ubers, guys!” 

“Do you even have a license?!” Quinn screamed back.

“Got it after five tries!” 

“Jesus pray for us…” Joe mumbled.

“More like Jesus take the wheel…” Quinn gulped as they tore down the roads at atrocious speeds. 

Evidently, Joe had no license, and Quinn was terrified of driving another car. That left Mercedes as the last option. Eventually Mercedes parked outside a typical suburban house, and Quinn reached for the car door, close to gagging and retching out whatever they ate before leaving. Joe stumbled out, breathing deeply and bending over to kiss the ground.

“Sweet, sweet ground…”

“My driving isn’t that bad!” 

The door to the suburban house opened, and Quinn quickly stood straight up, earning herself a small headrush as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, stumbling a little as Joe quickly jumped up from kissing the ground as Mercedes sauntered out. All three froze at the Harts staring at them.

Quinn tried to pick herself up and look as regal as she would, with iron in her spine as Head Cheerleader, despite the spittle at the corner of her mouth and the remains of her dinner on the ground by the trash bins in front of the house. Joe shifted uneasily on his feet, looking everywhere but at his parents as if he hadn’t been caught kissing the ground.

Mercedes simply rolled her eyes at the two and recovered faster, marching up straight to them, opening her mouth to say something-

“WAIT!” 

Everyone turned to stare at Sugar, who had just gotten out of a taxi and was huffily going over to them. “I heard the three of you talking and I’m disappointed you didn’t ask me. Also you guys really… kinda… suck at whispering.”

“Sugar, how did you know where I lived- well, used to live now,” Joe asked, confused.

Sugar hardly blinked. “I asked my dad.”

Everybody stared at her as it would bring more clarity to that statement. 

“Is your dad some sort of hitman from the mafia?!” Mercedes asked. “How does he know where people live?!”

Everybody also blinked at Mercedes, until Sugar laughed.

“Money gets people almost everything. But he’s not in the mafia, for the last time.” 

Mr. Hart cleared his throat, drawing everyone’s attention to him. “Are we done? Can we go back to the conversation we’re inevitably going to have?”

Quinn walked forward, having fixed most of her appearance, and with the sudden appearance of Sugar, the four of them felt strong against the Harts. 

“How astute, sir. And I do believe you know how the conversation will start, so it is purely redundant, but I’ll ask it anyways: why did you disown Joe for staying with the Glee club?” Quinn asked, folding her arms.

“You Catholic?” Mr. Hart asked, eyes landing on the cross she was wearing.

Quinn blinked, caught off guard. “Okay… maybe you don’t know how the conversation will start. You just said God bless me! In the hospital!”

She hated that she wore the cross. Right here. Right now. It made her disappointed in being a Catholic.

Apparently, Sugar’s blunt mouth was working wonders against the Harts today. “Wait- are you a goldfish?”

Quinn couldn’t help it, she snickered. Mercedes wasn’t any better, she straight up started laughing.

“This is pure gold…” Mercedes snorted. Joe nudged them both. 

“Can you stop laughing? Can I just-” Joe cleared his throat. “I just came to get my things, since you’re disowning me.”

“You guys don’t really have the heart to say it to his face, huh?” Sugar added. “Tough crowd.”

“We didn’t want you hanging out with these freaks of nature,” they spat.

“Isn’t God supposed to be loving?” Sugar asked. “Like, loving and kind and non-judgemental? If you’re like this, won’t He be angry at you?”

“How dare you!” Mrs. Hart gasped. “We are doing the Lord’s work!”

“Of… what? Ousting your own child from your own home? Is that what God would do? Oh wait. He did. It wasn’t technically his child but he threw out his own brightest angel from Heaven.” 

“I didn’t know you were well-read,” Quinn muttered to Sugar.

“Daddy didn’t raise no rich dumb bitch.” Sugar folded her arms and stared challengingly at the Hart parents. “Are you going to answer?”

“We will not be disrespected in our own home!”

“We’re not in it.”

“Well, our property, then!”

“Listen, the least you can give us is a reason, and his things. We’re not here to beg you to take him back, because frankly, he’s better off not here,” Quinn cut in, sensing that Joe was getting upset. 

“We gave you a reason.”

“Not a very good reason,” Mercedes snorted.

“Just give me a reason…” Sugar muttered, or sang softly.

“Nope, don’t. Just don’t, Sugar. I don’t want to associate any sort of song, especially any love songs, with this,” Mercedes proclaimed, marching straight into the house. “If that’s the reason, and that’s all they wanna say, don’t push it. They’re not going to say anything, and we’re going to be wasting our breaths on nothing, so let’s just spare them the trouble and just getting his things and  _ going.  _ Being around this kind of toxic environment is disgusting and unhealthy. Come on. Joe, where’s your room?”

“On the left…” Joe called out as Quinn and Sugar followed Mercedes straight in, making a beeline for Joe’s room. 

Joe’s room was the picture of bare, with white walls and a cross and a clock on the walls. Opening the closet revealed clothes and a mirror, a picture of Jesus stuck on the shiny surface. There was a bedside table with framed pictures of the Glee club’s Nationals victory the previous year, his younger self, and a family picture. Joe just looked… unhappy most of the time. None of them wanted to comment on that. Joe turned down both the family picture and the picture of his younger self but picked up the Glee club picture.

The four of them worked together, with Joe’s parents  _ generously  _ giving them boxes to put their things in. Joe looked like he wanted to cry, Sugar looked like she wanted to smack their faces in with his lamp but instead restrained herself with aggressively throwing clothes into the boxes.

“You know, he went through and saw something traumatic. Why won’t you support your child?” Quinn asked quietly. “Why disown him?”

Quinn was nothing short of mad. Her dad disowned her. Seeing it happen was hitting a little too close to home, especially with a man who had helped her through her accident and was nothing but patient and kind to everybody and being so accepting of everybody that she had to snap. No one deserved this kind of crap. Not even the worst person. The role of a parent, no matter how religious, is to support and care for their child. To guide no matter what.

“We stand with the Lord, we’ve given him too many chances… it’s unfortunate what happened, but, this is the last straw.”

“But that doesn’t make any of this okay!” Quinn screamed, making everybody freeze in shock. “None of this is okay. If Marley didn’t step up, he would have  _ died.  _ Your son would have  _ died.  _ Not that I wish this upon her, but, don’t you care that he would have been wiped away?”

Quinn was trying for a change of angle, but they wouldn’t budge. This made her angrier, fists clenching. She tried not to succumb to the wrath that had overtaken her. This was too much, because not even her own bad times made her this angry or frustrated with… anything. She realized with a sinking heart, that had she not been kicked out… she would have been like this, never knowing. It was terrible.

“God would protect him. We didn’t have to do much.”

“Did God protect Marley?” Joe asked, suddenly. He was shaking with anger. “Did God protect the children in these situations? Did God come down and ask for them in fits of tears, trying to comfort them? Did God send down a mental barrier that helped them?”

“Now you’re losing your faith, Joe. These sinners are corrupting you!”

Joe picked up the family picture and then threw it onto the floor, shattering the glass with an awful splintering sound. Cracks like spiderwebs crawled across the glass surface, as he picked up the picture of his younger self and shook it at them.

“I know in the ten commandments God said ‘Honor thy mother and father’. I was wondering when they’d add ‘thy child’ too,” Joe said, in tears. “I know God has His ways to help, but He uses you as His main tools to take care of me. Please- please don’t do this to me.”

“Are we finished?” Mercedes asked, packing up the last of the boxes as Sugar hugged Joe, but he was still reaching out for his parents.

“We are taking care of you,” they insisted. “But they are bad influences. If you want us to take care of you, you have to leave them.”

“Joe, don’t. Anybody who asks you to pick between them or something else is a recipe for disaster,” Mercedes butted in, looking pissed as all hell. 

“B-but…”

Quinn, perhaps sensing his dilemma, spoke up.

“We’re not the best influences around, it’s true, fine.” Quinn’s voice was wavering. “Some of us, we’re bullies, some of us are sluts, we don’t have the best of relationships with each other sometimes and our group dynamic is… complicated. We… say words we don’t mean, and we say words that we  _ do  _ mean. We can be friends, enemies, lovers in the span of a year, we are the absolute worst in relationship advice, we are very disconnected and connected at the same time. We have our own issues and flaws, we can be the ones who are very toxic, we can be the root of your problems.” Quinn took a pause. “But the main difference with us is that we are learning. We learn to grow and improve and accept. I mean- you saw me, Joe, from Head Bitch to cripple in an instant. I learned to see life from a chair, and regret everything that I have ever said to Artie. And… with this, with Marley, it’s going to introduce a new level of normal for us, one that’s more open, more caring, more accepting of who you are. You don’t know what could drive a person over the edge, and life is just… short. Fleeting. Whether you spend it praising God or living your life to the best you can, we are going to support you no matter who you’re with, what you’re doing, where you are.”

“We got your back in whatever you do. Even if you want to stay here. Which we highly don’t recommend because it’s not healthy and you’ll never see us again,” Sugar added. “Isn’t that what family does?”

“We are not family,” Mercedes snorted.

“But we care,” Quinn finished.

“I…” Joe was cut off by Quinn’s phone ringing. 

“Hello?” Quinn asked, looking peeved that whoever it was interrupted the moment. 

_ “It’s Mike… where the hell are you guys?” _

“We’re just picking up Joe’s stuff and having a confrontational moment. Why?”

_ “I need the van and you and Mercedes. Now.” _

“Can’t you call a taxi? Why do you need me and Mercedes?”

_ “Before Jake and Ryder blow another gasket- I need to take Ryder to the hospital, all hell broke loose and he broke his nose, and thus there isn’t another alumni to calm everybody else down. Kurt’s with Blaine and he can’t go anywhere, Puck can’t control everybody else on his own, and I don’t trust them being by themselves just yet. Also there’s a good chance they might freak out if they don’t see at least one alumni standing around, because Kurt and Blaine are in their room and Puck and Jake are headed to theirs’ and I can’t leave-” _

“Okay, okay. Slow down. Why not ask one of the three currently in the hospital?”

Mike was very quiet.

“Mike?”

_ “Something happened. Rachel called back very frantically, there was a lot of shouting. Quinn, it sounded bad. They heard it, and then they began to argue. Jake punched Ryder. I’m not…”  _ Mike lowered his volume.  _ “I’m not taking Ryder to their hospital, I’m just going to head to a clinic. It’s just a minor injury anyways, but I just need Ryder and Jake away from each other to cool off.” _

Quinn paled, looking over at everybody else. “We’ll be over. Do you need us to pick up anything on the way?”

_ “D-Does chocolate help to calm people down? Like with the dementors in Harry Potter? If it does, you should buy a fuck ton.” _

“Okay. We’ll pick up chocolate for the kids,” Quinn joked, earning a tiny laugh from Mike. “Anything else?”

_ “Rachel pitched me this idea. But if you could get stuffed animals for everybody… maybe also books on trauma… and support… it would be great.” _

“I’m guessing that also means I will pick up books on people with mental disabilities, right?”

_ “... sure. I have to go. See you.” _

Quinn set down the phone and there was a long silence. Everybody was waiting on Joe.

He had made his decision long ago, as he put the picture of himself and the glee club in a backpack and hoisted it up.

“I guess that’s our cue,” Joe said, picking up one of the boxes. “Thank you for everything, mom, dad. I’d pick you, but… I don’t think you’d grow and learn anymore. May God bless you, always.”

“JOSEPH HART!” They snapped. “You come back this instant!”

“Let him go,” Quinn said, picking up the boxes. “Let him learn his own lessons. Let him grow. And if he decides that this environment isn’t the best for him, it’s time you accept that. At least accept the fact that your son is growing, if you can’t accept us.”

With that, they marched out of the house, with Mercedes asking Joe if he had grabbed everything.

“I didn’t own much anyways, just my guitar and clothes and school stuff and identity papers are important,” Joe explained, before frowning. “I’m homeless now.”

“Not with us, you’re not!” Mercedes said briskly, getting into the driver’s seat. Everybody paled, gripping onto the seatbelts for dear life. But Quinn didn’t dare speak up to drive. Instead she braced herself as Mercedes hit the gas, van roaring to life as they sped down the street, Quinn trying not to panic, Sugar screaming, Joe… hollering and whooping like he was in a rollercoaster.

Because for years, he had been told what to eat, drink, say, do, who to hang out with, his life goals and ambitions, love, passions, family. But now, as Mercedes drove them all away, he was free. He was free to be… him. And it felt like a new beginning for him.

Maybe it was. 

They made a quick stop at a 24 hour grocer’s to pick up chocolate. Since it was night, they all agreed to find the books and stuffies in the morning.

Stepping back a little, back to the hospital just as Mercedes pulled out of the house, Rachel let go of Santana’s hand as soon as she saw Santana deeply asleep, and Sebastian looked like he was about to nod off too. She checked the clock, it read 2:13 AM.

“Sebastian, don’t you have school in the morning?” Rachel whispered, slowly getting off of Finn, whose arms had slackened around her and he was sleeping, but it was very restless. His nose was running, he was sweating profusely. His hands were trembling slightly.

Sebastian just stared at Finn, then Rachel, trying to comprehend everything that she was saying. “What?”

“You have school tomorrow. Shouldn’t you be going home?”

Home. Sebastian would scoff at that.

“Yeah… home… hey… do you know what’s wrong with him? Sebastian paused in the middle to yawn sleepily, stretching his arms up. “He looks… like… I dunno, one of the druggie Warblers during that whole fiasco.”

“Finn?” Rachel paused to look back at Finn. “I don’t know. He’s been acting strange, as if he’s sick.”

“Maybe he is?” Sebastian offered. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to stress you out, just seems like something to point out before it becomes… a big problem.”

“Maybe he just needs to sleep it off,” Rachel mused. “He doesn’t look like he’s been sleeping very well lately. College must be hard.”

Sebastian felt like something was still amiss. “Yeah…” He let out another yawn, prompting Rachel to fix him with a look. “What? Excited to get rid of me that easily?”

“I know you’re trying to do a redemption arc, but it won’t do anyone any good if you get into more trouble for skipping school for us, or sleeping in class for us. You should really go home. We’ll call if there are any changes.”

“I sure hope so. In our few meetings, I think she’s quite pleasant to be around. Wonder what the people were thinking when they bullied her. Even I wouldn’t.” Sebastian paused. “Or maybe that’s why. Who knows?”

Rachel tried not to wince when he brought up the fact that they bullied her. “Just… get some rest. We’ll see you later.”

“One last thing.” Sebastian handed her a picture of a gruff looking male with a thick goatee and a woman with a sharp nose and dark eyes. “If you see them, call the police. They’re your criminals. I’m not on board with the whole keeping the fact that they’re not caught from them, but…” Sebastian sighed. “I sent Kurt the picture too. Just… stay safe.”

“We will. Thank you.” 

Sebastian nodded, but fixed Finn with one last look before turning around to see Millie at the doors with some packages and notebooks.

“Millie,” Rachel said, surprised. “What are you doing here?”

“I couldn’t sleep. And I heard Marley was taken to emergency surgery, so I had to come back here. And… I thought you might appreciate her songs. She wanted to show you all of these ones eventually, but… I guess she never really got around to it.”

Sebastian saw her carrying a red blanket as Millie handed some of the notebooks to Rachel, who gently took it. “What’s that?”

“Marley’s old blanket, or her Supergirl cape,” Millie smiled, though it was very sad. “She still loves it, even if it’s several years later, even if she’s outgrown it being her cape. She tries to hide it from me, but she’s not very good at hiding her things from me.” Millie frowned for a moment, focusing on the floor. “Was I a good mother? I didn’t see how she was suffering until… now.”

Rachel smiled at a picture of Marley and Finn together on the Glease set, together with other pictures of Marley fooling around with Ryder and Unique. She could see though, that she wasn’t happy. Maybe she never was? Rachel looked up at Finn, who was in terrible shape, and compared him to the photo with Marley. He looked much better, like the world wasn’t on his shoulders so much. Why were these photos pinched between the pages? As Rachel flipped through, there were more photos, going backwards in chronological order. The more photos she looked through, the less dim Marley’s smile was. They were photos taken by professional photographers, unlike the Glease photos. 

Marley looked…  _ smaller.  _ Her eyes were more sunken in, she was clearly trying to hide a broken arm in one of the pictures. She flipped a couple of pages more, skimming the songs, because it was clear there were pictures hidden in-between the pages. She reached the end, where there was a pocket filled with a few photos. Before Rachel could inspect the photos in there, she saw a picture of Marley on her first day of school.

She looked unhappy.

Rachel wanted to grit her teeth, on seeing this. No one deserved this. She opened the pocket, and she paled. The notebook clattered on the floor, forcing Sebastian and Millie to look at her. The photos pinched between the pages scattered across the floor, a jagged tapestry of fake smiles and hidden injuries.

“What happened to her?” Rachel asked, no,  _ demanded.  _ “What happened before McKinley?”

Her hands were shaking, tears blurring her vision. She felt like she was going to be sick.

Millie looked stunned, as Sebastian crouched to gather the photos and the notebook, pausing to inspect each one before carefully sliding them in-between the pages.

Santana and Finn startled awake at the noise, Santana’s soft snores becoming snorts as she pulled herself from sleep and frowned sleepily at Rachel. 

“I don’t know the full story either…” Millie whispered. “She wouldn’t tell me.”

“What’s going on?” Finn and Santana asked.

Rachel was still clutching onto the photos in her hand, almost crumpling them. She turned both of them over to show everybody. “This. What happened?”

Santana took one look at the photos and rose angrily, with Finn glowering. 

“They said she was bullied… that she accidentally fell off a building. I think… I think they pushed her. They found her in the closet repeatedly, and that last photo came about when they were caught locking her in there.”

“Attempted murder! That is attempted murder!” Santana exclaimed, pointing a finger angrily at the pictures. 

Before anyone could say anything else, all the nurses were rushing. Rushing, rushing… yelling something about a code… something. 

It became a blur after that. The call. Everything was a blur. All that mattered to them was one thing. 

_ Marley was dying. Marley was dying.  _

Rachel had grabbed the red blanket from Millie and wrapped it around herself and sank to the floor, not able to do anything as Sebastian, Finn and Santana were arguing with the nurses. 

_ “Hey, Marley!” Rachel had greeted one day. _

_ “Oh, hi. What made you call?” Marley greeted, but was audibly confused. She sounded tired too. _

_ “Nothing! Can’t I just say hi?” _

_ “Mmmm, sure… if you’re not Rachel Berry,” Marley joked. _

_ Rachel feigned offense, giving an overdramatic huff. “How very dare you, Ms. Rose! I assure you I have nothing but the purest intentions.” _

_ “Okay then!” Marley laughed. “Hi to you too.” _

_ “Ouch. You don’t wish to speak to me?” _

_ “In my defense, you reached out first.” _

_ “I just wanted to ask how you’ve been,” Rachel said honestly. “With Sectionals… and all.” _

_ There was a pause. “I’ve been good. I haven’t done anything else, I swear.” _

_ Something about that made Rachel’s stomach turn in a weird way, like as if it felt like a warning sign for something more. She should have questioned why Marley was defensive. _

_ “That’s great!” _

_ “What about you?” Marley asked, “How’s NYADA?” _

_ “It’s great…” And in true Rachel fashion, she began to talk a lot. She should have asked if Marley was okay. _

_ Because on the other side of the call, Marley’s shoulders and thighs were bloody. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment down below! You can leave suggestions and I may or may not write them. Leave feedback too! I love seeing comments.


	10. Chapter 10: Keep Holding On/Roses are Red...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roses are red  
> violets are blue  
> everybody's bleeding  
> but blood is red too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy some fluff here, I guess? If it could be called fluff? Fluff fluff fluff fluff until the angst comes in like a wrecking ball.
> 
> I've been contemplating on having Puck sing Keep Holding On, but it didn't make sense why until I thought of the Blaine/Quinn voiceover as it's playing and scene change into the hospital. I liked it, I think it turned out pretty well.
> 
> As I said a couple of chapters ago, I'm not introducing Marley's endgame in this story, it's only in the sequel that I will and shall. BUT, Marley's endgame isn't the only OC person I'm introducing! Someone else will come into play soon. Not to worry, the focus will be and always has been on the ND's friendships. She'll come in next chapter, ending the action arc of the first 24 hours into one of Marley's arcs as well as sending this entire fic into a go. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, we have just barely only started.

“You okay man?” Joe asked, as the events of the really early morning began to slowly die down and everyone retreated to bed for a restless sleep. Ryder and Mike had returned a few minutes ago, with Ryder crashing in Artie and Mike’s room for the time being because he didn’t want to feel alone and Artie seemed to be the most chill person of the current Glee club he could be with at the moment, barring Sam who was at the hospital, and Blaine, whom nobody quite trusted to be around except for Kurt and possibly Sebastian.

“I dunno. Feels like everybody’s spiralling out of control. It feels like it’s knocked everybody out of their orbit and so many things are happening… I can’t do anything to help them…”

“I don’t know about the others, but I feel alone. And lost. But free, at the same time. It’s tough, man, knowing that even the club that is supposed to help you through this kind of crap can be the one to put you on it, or you could be unknowingly the one putting another person through crap. Our experience of the same event are different, that we can still feel alone.”

“But we’re here.”

“We don’t always know that.”

Puck sighed, grabbing his guitar. “If you won’t believe it, I’ll sing it.”

**_You’re not alone… together we stand, I’ll be by your side, you know I’ll take your hand…_ **

**_When it gets cold, and it feels like the end… there’s no place to go, you know I won’t give in…_ **

Joe joined in, laughing, strumming on his own guitar.

**_No, I won’t give in…_ **

**_Keep holding on… ‘cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through._ **

**_Just stay strong… ‘cause you know I’m here for you, I’m here for you…_ **

Quinn sighed, looking over Puck and Joe from the stairs, leaning at the railing. Blaine slowly joined her, having crept out of his room with Kurt. Kurt was knocked out, exhausted, but Blaine simply couldn’t sleep. Quinn was just stressed after sorting out everything with everyone’s fighting and getting everybody settled. 

**_There’s nothing you can say… nothing you can do…_ **

**_There’s no other way when it comes to the truth so, keep holding on…_ **

**_‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through…_ **

“What are you doing up?”

“I heard guitars,” Blaine smiled tiredly. “What about you, do you have an excuse?”

Quinn looked him over and sighed, smiling. “At least you’re smiling a little.”

**_So far away, I wish you were here…_ **

**_Before it’s too late, this could all disappear…_ **

**_Before the doors close, this comes to an end…_ **

**_But with you by my side, I will fight and defend…_ **

**_I’ll fight and defend… yeah… yeah…_ **

“Do you think it will all be better?” Blaine whispered, staring at the floor. “I don’t mean just for her, I mean for everybody. We all… got hit hard.”

“I can’t promise that it’ll all get better,” Quinn answered, but smiled at him. “Not immediately maybe, not fully.”

“But?” Blaine prompted. “I sense a but there.”

Quinn sighed, looking over the two guitarists on the sofa. “But you have to understand that different people, they have different speeds to recovery. You can’t protect everybody, Blaine. We’ll be with you every step of the way, but sometimes… people fall apart. They don’t make it. Some demons are too strong… you can’t blame yourself for things out of your control.”

**_Keep holding on…_ **

**_‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through…_ **

**_Just stay strong… ‘cause you know I’m here for you, I’m here for you…_ **

“But I can’t help it,” Blaine said. “She was there… right there. I could have stopped her. I could have done something.”

“Could you?” Quinn challenged. 

“She’s dying… and it’s my fault,” Blaine whispered. “When Rachel called earlier… she was dying. I can feel it in my gut. I think they knew it too, and everyone’s just-”

“Blaming themselves as hard, if not then harder than you,” Quinn finished, eyes softening. “But we can’t do anything about it now. We have to support her when she comes out of the hospital.”

“If,” Blaine corrected.

Quinn closed her eyes. “If.”

**_There’s nothing you can say…_ **

**_Nothing you can do…_ **

**_There’s no other way when it comes to the truth so, keep holding on…_ **

**_‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through…_ **

“Everyone has their problems, and we’re all going to face them together. No more running, no more hiding. We’re not doing that anymore. It’ll be okay.”

“I’m just tired,” Blaine said softly. “Really tired.”

Quinn looked at him. Blaine looked worn out, instead of the usual happy look he had, or the panicked look he had, or the other expressive faces he had. When he was being melodramatic, when he was being cheeky, when he was upset at Kurt for ‘cheating’ on him, when he was performing with the purple pianos… now he was blank. It seemed unusual for it to appear on his face, much less for it to look like it was naturally there. It was scarily easy for Blaine to look blank, as if his face just defaulted to that expression.

Quinn recognized it, had seen it on her face for so many days, especially after her pregnancy, when the postpartum happened. Staring at the mirror, watching the bags under her eyes grow heavier and heavier. She recognized it when she reached college, at Yale, when she sat and reflected and realized how unhappy she was, how alone she felt most of the time. 

She had seen it on Rachel, over and over, when the drama queen thought no one was looking. She had seen it on Brittany whenever someone called her stupid. She had seen it on Artie when someone brought up the fact that he couldn’t walk and no one wanted to take the extra difficulty to take him into consideration. 

**_Hear me when I say, when I say, I believe…_ **

**_Nothing’s gonna change, nothing’s gonna change destiny…_ **

**_Whatever’s meant to be will work out perfectly…_ **

**_Yeah, yeah yeah yeah…_ **

“I know… but it’s okay,” Quinn said softly. “It will be better… eventually.”

“But I want it better now,” Blaine sighed. “I want it better.”

“It’s not that easy.”

“I know, but it also doesn’t get easier hearing that either, especially when you’ve been trying so hard to be okay for so many years…” Blaine protested.

Quinn smiled sadly at him, putting an arm around his shoulders. “I’m sorry for all the shit I pulled in my senior year.”

Blaine laughed sadly. “It’s okay. To be very honest my performance of It’s Not Unusual would have been on fire regardless.”

They both chuckled slightly, Quinn shoving him lightly. “Wow, talk about confidence.”

**_Ladadada ladadada ladada dadadadadada…_ **

Blaine sighed, after their small laugh. “Man, we really have a lot of things to work out amongst ourselves, huh?”

“One step at a time. We can do this.”

“I never imagined we’d see this day.”

“Tragedy?”

“No…” Blaine smiled. “That in a dark time we’d see maybe even a tiny bit of hope.”

Quinn chuckled softly. “Believe me, I’ve lived through some shit. Take it from me. I might not have been the most reliable person back in high school, but I’d like to think I know better. We can make it together. Trust me.”

Blaine threw his arm around her shoulders in a side hug, detecting the sliver of insecurity and guilt for what she did before coming through in her voice. “Of course. I trust you.”

**_So keep holding on…_ **

**_‘Cause you know we’ll make it through, we’ll make it through…_ **

**_Just stay strong…_ **

**_‘Cause you know I’m here for you, I’m here for you…_ **

Puck and Joe were singing together, smiling, Puck nodding encouragingly at Joe as their guitars weaved in and out of harmony, with Blaine and Quinn watching from above. In the rooms, no one was actually really sleeping. They all lingered by their doors, softly singing along to the music drifting through the house.

Meanwhile, in the hospital, the doctor was speaking to Millie.

“We almost lost her a few times, but she’s currently stable.”

Everybody had an audible sigh of relief as Sebastian leaned against the wall, Finn sitting next to Rachel and pulling her close to his side. She was still wrapped in the blanket, quiet. Santana dropped onto the chair, hands shaking. She wanted to see Brittany, but visiting hours were way over. 

“It’s okay, she’s fine. We’re fine. We’re okay. We’re okay,” Finn was repeating, much of it was more of to convince himself that it was all okay. 

**_There’s nothing you can say, nothing you can do…_ **

**_There’s no other way when it comes to the truth…_ **

**_So keep holding on…_ **

**_‘Cause you know we’ll make it through…_ **

**_We’ll make it through._ **

Nothing more happened the rest of the morning. They were pretty sure when the sun rose, peeking golden rays into the hospital, that they had fallen asleep halfway through. Sebastian was the first to wake, with the sunlight blinding his eyes as he cracked them open. His mouth felt dry, as he woozily pulled himself upright from the chair he had occupied as he slept. He blinked sleepily, wiping the drool away from the corner of his mouth as he blearily focused on Rachel and Finn on the floor. At some point, Rachel had thrown the blanket over Finn’s shoulders too, even though it was rather small for them to share. They were practically cuddling upright on the floor, asleep. 

_ ‘Just friends’, my ass.  _

Santana was the next to wake. She pushed herself upright, rubbing her eyes as she looked around, before rolling her eyes at Finn and Rachel on the floor, before looking at Sebastian, and then doing a double take.

“Aren’t you supposed to go to school?”

“I fell asleep,” Sebastian deadpanned. “Oh well, fuck school anyways.”

Santana raised her eyebrow. “Didn’t peg you as the type to skip school.”

“I have a fake ID, I think I can skip a few days of school,” Sebastian smirked, stretching his long limbs. “I’m good. And besides, after the shit my brother pulled, it doesn’t seem like a good idea to return. Who knows what other spy he has planted there for my ‘protection’.” He did air quotes as he said this, rolling his eyes. “Plus, I could use new inspiration. I need to bring back Warbler class, and hanging around that environment after what happened isn’t going to help me.”

In other words, Sebastian was avoiding school. Santana was familiar with this.

“If you liked us, you could have just said so,” Santana laughed.

“This is mere offering of hands,” Sebastian shot back, but both of them knew that he had developed a genuine fondness of the group.

(He doesn’t regret admitting it. They  _ do  _ make him better.

Granted, at the moment, they’re not the best influences considering he’s skipping school, but he considers it healthy that he’s spending time away from a toxic environment. One with many eyes and spies and unsaid chains.

At least, with them, it feels like a breath of fresh air.

But it will take Santana murdering him for those words to pass across his lips again.

Again, he knows she knows. It’s unsaid. He doesn’t have to say anything. But he also knows it’s in her nature to tease, gripe and annoy the hell out of her friends and enemies, so he takes it all in stride.)

He got up, with Santana following, and both of them cast a look at sleeping Rachel and Finn, then at sleeping Millie, before spying the notebooks and pictures.

“I knew it,” Santana said, staring at the pictures. “I knew she was bullied. Why would anyone transfer because they had no friends?”

Sebastian stared at the pictures, scanning the different photos. He folded his arms and leaned over to Santana. “Are you going to start a witch-hunt?”

“Yes. These motherfuckers are going to pay. They will face the wrath of Santana Lopez.”

“I’ll bring the hunting dogs.”

“I’ll bring the pitchforks.”

They were evilly plotting together, as they saw Blaine, Kurt and Jake come in through the doors, carrying food and coffee.

“Food!” Santana yelled, racing towards them and snatching a coffee and loaf from them. “Mmm fuck yes, thank you, Lady Hummel. Quinn’s baking is heaven.”

“Please, wash your hands before you tear into the food like an animal!” Kurt huffed. Blaine laughed, carrying a backpack. Jake still looked sleepy, his clothes rumpled, as if he just rolled out of bed.

“What’s in the pack?” Sebastian asked. 

“Stuff to entertain the bedridden ones. Shouldn’t you be in Dalton?” Blaine asked.

“Might as well be away for the moment, brainstorm how the Warblers’ going to bring back at least some class,” Sebastian answered, swiping a coffee and bread. 

“You’re spying on us.”

“I’m graduating this year,” Sebastian smirked. “With your current batch, actually. Thanks to Hunter, I have lost my chance at obtaining another trophy on my last year. There is absolutely no reason for me to spy on you, but I have been thinking of ideas to leave behind on how to reform the Warblers-  _ if  _ they ever reform. You were right, Blaine. We lost the class.”

“Thank God someone realized it,” Kurt joked, before Jake broke the ease in the air with a cutting question.

“What happened last night?”

Sebastian exhaled, not sure of what to say. “Well, um, something happened, a false alarm, but it’s fine, it’s all fine now.”

Jake scrutinized him for a few moments, contemplating if he was telling the truth, but he relaxed, and by extension, Blaine and Kurt relaxed too. Sebastian relaxed, feeling like his face was safe from any sudden punches. Jake noticed, looking ashamedly down. 

“Sorry about punching you.”

Sebastian waved a hand, scoffing. “It’s okay. You all probably owe me a couple of hits anyways.”

Finn startled awake, blinking at the smell of coffee. His movements jostled Rachel, who woke up too. He made a sleepy noise, reaching out for the coffee.

“Caffeine…” he mumbled.

“Caffeine’s bad for you,” Rachel sleepily scolded. 

“Caffeine looks like the only thing that would help you survive and stay awake,” Kurt said, and Rachel’s eyes flew open, as she hastily stood up, letting Marley’s blanket fall on Finn’s shoulders as he yelped.

“Kurt!”

“Yes, it is I.”

Sebastian munched down the bread and took a sip of the lukewarm coffee as Finn shuffled over, blanket draped around his broad shoulders before he smoothly dropped it on Rachel’s shoulders, draping it over her like a hood. “I’m starved.”

“Finn you honestly do not look good,” Kurt said. “Can you at least head back to the house and rest up and freshen up?”

“Don’f wanf tho,” Finn muttered, through a mouthful of bread. His complexion seemed a little better than when he first arrived, but he still looked sick. He swallowed hard and repeated himself. “Don’t want to.”

“I doubt any of the bedridden ones would even allow you near them if you look like that,” Sebastian muttered into his coffee.

Rachel swiped a slice of bread from them and stole away from the group, sneaking into Brittany and Kitty’s room. Sam was already awake with Brittany, both of them trying to argue about the merits of cats and dogs.

“... but to be fair can we just say that human senses suck in comparison to cats and dogs?” Brittany asked. “Cats can see in the dark much better than we can and dogs can smell better than we can. And they can hear things better than we can.”

“Oh definitely. Despite having lower brain mass than humans, they can get along easier than us humans,” Sam nodded seriously, and Kitty groaned.

“Can you both stop nerding out for TWO SECONDS, that would be fantastic.”

“The Fantastic Four are actually Marvel characters… not DC…” Brittany trailed off.

“You’re worse than Marley and Blaine!” Kitty sighed, burying her head into the pillow, voice becoming muffled. “Except theirs’ is music and comic books, but you’re literally discussing everything!”

“Perks of dating…?” Sam questioned, and Rachel giggled slightly, allowing herself to make an entrance. 

Kitty launched a pillow at Sam, who ducked. Brittany laughed as Sam jumped onto her bed, burrowing his way into her left side.

“Britt! Kitty’s bullying me!”

“I see you’re all rather cheerful this morning,” Rachel grinned. “Do you feel any better?” 

“I’ll be out of here by tomorrow!” Brittany said happily. “But I have to avoid school for the rest of the week, and dancing and Cheerios for the next two weeks.”

“I feel attacked right now,” Sam admitted, poking his head out of Brittany’s side. “Attacked by big white fluffy pillows.”

“Boobs,” Brittany said randomly. Rachel choked on air. Kitty screamed into her other pillow.

“I will now leave and subject you to this, Wilde, goodbye.” Rachel gave an overdramatic bow, much to Kitty’s screeching confusion and Sam’s laughter.

“Traitor! I can’t leave!”

“Hey, Sam?” Brittany asked, trying to hide her giggling.

“Yes?”

“Wanna make out?”

“RACHEL TAKE ME WITH YOU!” Kitty shouted.

“Nope!” Rachel laughed, sliding out the door. “Enjoy your make out session!”

She felt lighter now, as she had lingered at the doorway, with Sam and Brittany yeeting back the pillow Kitty had thrown at them, with Sam starting a conversation about menial things, allowing Kitty to join in. It was an almost 24 hour pass, and things were settling down to normal. Or maybe this was just them trying to ignore what happened, trying to keep up the facade that nothing had changed.

But truthfully, everything had changed. 

It changed with the gunshots. It changed in an instant. 

This was just their way of running away from it, as Brittany snuggled up to Sam, head resting on his shoulder as Kitty bitched about a new Cheerio on the team. 

Rachel finally turned away, heading to Marley’s room, where she was finally put back in and the others were starting to gravitate towards, but Jake, Finn, Blaine, Kurt and Santana had taken one peek inside and paled, shuffling away from the room and all of them wanting to see Kitty and Brittany and Sam. Santana seemed especially ecstatic to see Brittany, even if Sam was around.

“What’s going on with them? I thought they’d want to see Marley?” Rachel asked.

“They do, but… they also don’t,” Sebastian said, shuffling nervously. “And they already saw a glimpse of her.”

“Then why did they run?”

“It’s better if you see it for yourself.” Sebastian pushed open the door a crack.

Marley’s head was shaved, buzzed off. There were sutures on the side of her head, small holes stitched up. She looked pale and frail, as Rachel froze at the doorway. He made as if to close it, but she stopped him with a hand on his arm.

“Don’t.”

“The doctor said she won’t wake up for a bit, maybe later,” Sebastian said softly, pushing the door open for her as they both stepped inside, with him closing the door behind him.

Rachel looked at Marley, then noticed the notebooks and pictures set on the bedside table. Carefully she went closer, pulling the red blanket off of her shoulders and over Marley, settling her arms on top so that she could hug the blanket when she woke. She straightened, looking at Sebastian.

“Did they say when?”

“I don’t know… but it is brain surgery, so she’ll be out for a long while.”

“Can you keep an eye on her? I want to get some things,” Rachel smiled tiredly at him. “Maybe you could read her some more comic books. I- I’m not going to force the others to come back… I know they also wanted to see Kitty and Britt.”

Sebastian laughed softly, taking a seat beside Marley. “Sure, I guess so. When you come back, uhm…”

“Hm?” Rachel asked, halfway out the door.

_ Can I stay with you guys?  _ He wanted to ask, but his mouth just responded, “Uh, I’ll head out, get an overnight bag or something. I can cover overnights here.”

“And skip school?” Rachel asked skeptically.

“I could use an excuse,” Sebastian admitted, bracing himself for the rejection.

Rachel scrutinized him, and he wasn’t sure if it was the flit of emotions across her eyes or the way he tensed up, but Rachel sighed.

“Call your school and see if it’s okay. Santana and I might be a little comfortable with you here with Marley, but we’re not the main ones you have to convince to let you stay.”

Sebastian nodded. He didn’t know why, he just felt like he had to stay for this girl. He reckoned it could be a romantic thing, but he was gay. No, it was probably the whole ‘I’ll find you in every universe’ thing but platonic. He liked her anyways. And he did want to be better. The New Directions encouraged him to be better than himself. He watched Rachel leave and sighed, sinking in his chair, before shooting off a text message to the school, filling the room with sarcastic commentary on what he was doing.

“Dalton has such great customer service, it outranks the smell of public schools in my list of things that I hate.”

“If I had a dollar every time someone told me that the Warblers are the scum of the school for using drugs, I’d get enough money to feed the world twice over.”

“Dalton’s taking down the Fight Club?! Blaine set it up, and it had such great rules, and- fuck, I broke the rules by talking about it, didn’t I?”

Then, after settling the Dalton Academy matters by sending an elaborately worded email…

“Wow, Hunter’s allowed to post on the internet? They should’ve banned him. He looks like a frog cross-bred with a fish in this picture.”

“Hunter calls those abs?! I’d bet a million dollars that the cheerleaders in your school have bigger abs than that!”

“He looks like the Warbler version of Kermit the Frog.”

It was safe to say that Sebastian loathed Hunter with every single bone in his body. His phone buzzed in the middle of a rant about how Hunter had ruined the Warblers and their sound and how terrible it was, and the caller ID sent shivers down his spine. He answered it, muttering an apology to Marley as he stepped outside and down the hallway, just out of sight of Marley’s door.

“Get out of my life,” he said, in lieu of a response.

_ “Sebby, why did you have to talk to the police?” _

“Because it was the right thing to do,” he gritted out. “Get out of my life.”

_ “Sebby, you know I can’t-” _

“Stop calling me that. Get out of my life. You have ruined my life. You ruined the Warblers, you ruined the New Directions-”

_ “You care about them?! Honestly, they needed to learn a lesson!” _

“Yes, fine, but that was not the way! You almost killed them! They never deserved that! Maybe they had a few lessons to learn but you- you’re a monster.”

_ “I didn’t do my job properly, Sebby…” _ The voice was almost whiney. _ “Do I have to come back and finish the job?” _

“NO!” Sebastian snarled.

_ “Oh, I get it. You’ll be the one to do it!” _

Sebastian controlled his anger with a shuddering breath. “You’re a monster. But that doesn’t mean I have to be one too.”

With that, he stuffed his phone in his pocket and stormed back into the room, spying a scruffy looking man with a goatee, looking at all the room numbers before pausing outside of Marley’s room.

“... can I help you?” Sebastian asked, warily.

The dirty, disheveled man smiled crookedly at Sebastian, all yellow teeth and stinking of alcohol and an unknown musk. “Yes, I’m looking for my daughter Marley’s room.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have now officially entered full AU and the rest of the seasons will be rewritten (hopefully better!).
> 
> Comment down below! Leave feedback and suggestions and ideas! Little prompts for little scenes in-between, especially fluff scenes, because I love writing those.
> 
> I hope you all are doing well in this time and day. Stay safe, stay hydrated, stay healthy! 
> 
> Also ughhhh medical information I tried to be as close as possible, but take it with a pinch of salt, especially recovery times. I'm sorry.


	11. Chapter 11: Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel)/ Here's (Peter) Parker!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marley struggles further. Rachel places Jake in a hard spot. 
> 
> The Devil's here, and Kitty makes a deal. Who says the Devil can't be generous?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gahhhh, this is so short but I promise next chapter is better.

Santana wanted to scream. Sebastian was still blocking the way to Marley’s room- good kid, but Santana did not like this man. It also didn’t help that Jake was the one who pointed out that it was the same racist man they encountered on their way out last night. Finn was trying to distract him.

And now he was Marley’s  _ dad. _

“He walked out on Marley when she was three, became a drug dealer and drug runner, called her the biggest mistake of his life and now he wants to get back into her life. I don’t like it, I’m gonna kick him out.”

“It’s not a good idea?” Blaine asked, but he sounded like he didn’t believe himself. 

“I don’t care if it isn’t, I’m still kicking him out.”

Kitty didn’t answer, reaching immediately for her phone and dialling a number. Santana’s eyes tracked her movements, Kurt stared at Kitty but made no move to do anything to stop her.

“What are you doing?” Santana asked.

“Calling the local handyperson.” 

Blaine tilted his head. “What? I get there’s a lot of things to fix, but we don’t actually need a literal handyperson to do things-”

“No,” Kitty said, rolling her eyes. “You know how in prisons you always have this one guy who knows how to get anything and everything? She is like- the school equivalent of that. Our school equivalent.”

“Oh!” Brittany said, perking up. “I know her. She tutors me sometimes.”

Blaine and Kurt still looked blank, but Jake spoke up, albeit a little slowly, almost in disbelief. “You… have the number… of the school devil?”

“Yeah, the one that deals in deals. Are we talking about the same person here?” Kitty asked, almost unnerved by the fact that everybody but Blaine (and Brittany, but honestly, another student can’t scare her). 

“I don’t know that person,” Blaine admitted. Santana crossed the room and plucked the phone from Kitty’s hands, ignoring the pouted  _ hey  _ from Kitty as she reread the conversation.

**handyperson:** so need a favour?

**wildcat:** i need a favour.

**wildcat:** it’s about what happened yesterday

**wildcat:** why werent you there

**handyperson:** plot convenience

**wildcat:** what

**handyperson:** what

**handyperson:** so what’s your favour

**wildcat:** help us boot this man out of the hospital

**handyperson:** but santanas there

**handyperson:** cant she do it

**wildcat:** or you can tell me why you didnt turn up yesterday

**handyperson:** i fell sick.

**wildcat:** strike one

**handyperson:** i was running late and decided not to go at all

**wildcat:** strike two

**handyperson:** FINE i was helping someone with a deal

**wildcat:** strike three and i’ll make sure people don’t call you the devil anymore

**handyperson:** okay, fine. I knew something was up when i turned up.

**handyperson:** yes i turned up don’t be so shocked

**handyperson:** not my fault you don’t notice me, that’s why you guys also end up calling me death or shinigami for some reason

**handyperson:** i left around the middle of the day, just before your glee rehearsal

**handyperson:** i wasnt lying, i was doing a deal, but it was to spy on a man who came into town over and over again, then eventually like living nearby

**handyperson:** one of your cheerleaders felt very vulnerable, so i checked it out. I figured if there was a threat, i might as well do it for free as well, since it sounds very threatening

**wildcat:** was this man the guy who shot us

**handyperson:** no

**handyperson:** i dont know if hes worse

**handyperson:** happy?

**wildcat:** okay

**wildcat:** can you do me a favour?

**handyperson:** what

**handyperson:** that’s for two already, wilde

Santana stared at the messages with alarm. “You’re going to ask her to boot him out? I want that privilege.”

“No offense, Santana, but your method might involve you going to the hospital or the precinct,” Jake admitted. “At least with Parker it’s a lot less… brutal.”

“Sorry, but I’m having a hard time following,” Blaine said.

“She’s nice,” Brittany supplied. “Her name is Parker Maxwell Booker.”

“She tutors you for free,” Sam said.

“I’ve met Parker before, I think I can back Brittany up on this one,” Kurt said, looking at the messages. “She also sounds like she’s scared of Santana.”

“She should be. I dealt with her to help me look into Vocal Adrenaline and the Warblers in our second and third years,” Santana said calmly, handing the phone back to Kitty. “And also with Brody.”

“You-” Kurt choked. “You told her to look into Brody?”

Santana looked unfazed. “Yes. I got the information, she did the digging. And I also obtained Finn. The deal was done… not very gently.”

Blaine blinked. “Are we supposed to be scared of her?”

“Yes-” “No-” Both Jake and Santana said at the same time.

“I sent it,” Kitty said simply, putting down the phone. “She’s on her way.”

“Yay!” Brittany cheered. Jake looked pale. Santana just sighed, furrowing her brows. 

“I’ll meet her out there since Kitty, you can’t really meet her. I’ll also check on our guest. Sam, have you got a hold of Rachel and Marley’s mom?”

“Yeah. They’re on their way back as fast as they can,” Sam said, wrapping his arms around Brittany and laying his head on her shoulder. Brittany giggled at the contact, and Santana resisted gagging.

Jake looked like he didn’t want to step out and face the self-proclaimed devil herself, so Santana went alone. She walked down the hallway, to see Sebastian standing at Marley’s door, scowling. 

“Hey, Wonder Boy,” Santana called, and Sebastian turned his head and almost sagged in relief upon seeing her. Finn was talking wildly to the man, gesticulating and he seemed stressed.

“Where’s Mrs. Rose?” Sebastian asked, gritting his teeth.

“On her way. I think Finn can keep him busy long enough. I need you to come with me,” Santana said.

“What for?” Sebastian asked suspiciously.

Santana didn’t respond, dragging him along past Finn and Marley’s dad, who turned his head just a little to inspect them with a searching gaze as they walked past. Santana couldn’t help but feel like she’d seen him before. Sebastian felt all his hackles rising as they walked past, noticing Finn’s angry and distressed face.

But Santana pulled him out to the side, to the parking lot where cars pulled in. A dark beaten up pickup truck that was splashed with all kinds of dried mud pulled in with a soft roar, with black tinted windows as the truck rattled its way towards them. Sebastian pointed at it. 

“Who’s that?”

“You’re about to meet the devil of McKinley,” Santana sighed. “Also, our latest ally.”

“What?”

“The money’s nice and all, but sometimes we need friends in other places too…” Santana hesitantly looked at the truck, which was just idling, presumably because the driver had seen them talking and wanted to let them finish.

“You seem to forget the questionable shit we pulled.”

“Trust me, that doesn’t compare to the handyperson of McKinley High,” Santana grumbled, folding her arms. 

“Why don’t you like her?” Sebastian asked.

“She took my spot for most badass girl in school. But truth be told, she’s a ghost, unlike me,” Santana huffed, then she softened. “I knew her once. She bluntly called me out on the shit I said. I, of course, didn’t believe her. She told me that it wasn’t a path I should be on, I could be better. We weren’t that close back then, and we aren’t now, so I didn’t listen. After that she just… vanished from the halls.” Santana had a bitter half-smile. “I’d like to think she was disappointed in me. And still is. I think she’s come around to warn some of us what we’re doing is wrong, maybe as far as trying to blackmail me once for doing some sketchy shit. I hunted her down and kicked the shit out of her. After that- I don’t know. I think she gave up. I’m both disappointed and glad she did. That was probably around the time she really started giving favours around the school.”

“Favours?”

“Not the sexual kind of shit, she never ever did those, but she’d help you with things. Investigating somebody, finding blackmail, helping you cheat, helping you find something, smuggling things in and out- there were a lot of things she could do for you, but in exchange, you had to do something for her. And hence they were called deals. Deals with the devil.” Santana chuckled lowly at herself. “Some people found out that the devil’s always in the details. I learned that the hard way with your Warblers. I told her to do something about the Blaine situation against your Warblers, so she did. She walked into your school, filed a complaint without any evidence, then walked out. Nothing happened. I went on and on and on on her about what the hell she did, but she just said I owed her a favour and that was that.”

Sebastian stared at the floor, trying to take all this in. “What were you expecting her to do?”

“Splash slushie in your faces too, I know she did that for a deal once.” Santana remembered the time where somebody asked Parker to splash slushie all over Rachel. 

Oh, Parker did deliver, but the end of the deal was that the person who made the deal had to be the one to help clean up Rachel. They refused, and they ended up getting suspended for a week for underage drinking and creeping on Rachel.

Since then no one had asked Parker to slushie anyone for them. It was one of her major outlawed deals. Slushie? No dice. And no one backed out of a deal once they took it, because it was clear that Parker wasn’t taking no for an answer.

(No one wanted to comment on the fact that after that slushie incident, a poster in the gymnasium painted with slushie screamed, ‘IF YOU WANT TO SLUSHIE SOMEONE, AT LEAST DO IT TO THEIR FACES.’ And that was that. Rachel had a star map appear mysteriously in her locker, long with a hastily written apology and an ace of spades playing card. Santana knows for a fact that Rachel kept the star map with her even until now, because it was a very beautifully decorated star map and Rachel had it somewhere in her room. It was definitely hidden, but it was an apology gift from the devil of McKinley. Count your blessings.)

Sebastian and Santana both turned to face the truck, and the engines finally stalled and sputtered to a stop. Sebastian tried not to look hurt at the reminder that he caused Blaine pain.

A girl with brown-blonde hair that was styled into a messy, short-ish fringe with an undercut, wearing red and black checkered flannel, black inner shirt and pants climbed out of the truck, landing softly on her feet. Her head tilted up to reveal a pair of sunglasses covering her eyes, mostly due to the bright sun, and a charming, boyish grin that seemed to scream that she just was having fun and taking life easy. 

But Santana knew better than that. Sebastian now knew better. The more he looked, the more out of place the girl seemed. 

The girl looked stressed, for one. She slung her messenger bag over her shoulder with a forced casualness that broke from the rest of her demeanour. 

“Ser Detective,” Santana flatly greeted. The girl- whom Sebastian was assuming was Parker- looked at her, and the grin widened.

“Santana! Or is it Miss Lopez now?” Parker asked, smirking, before turning to Sebastian and looking at him carefully. “And you must be the ever popular Sebastian Smythe.”

“Do not call me Miss Lopez, or I will call you Generic Butch!” Santana threatened, stepping closer to Parker, but to Parker’s credit, she didn’t budge, the smile on her face turning impassive at the physical threat. Behind the glasses, Sebastian could see the eyebrows rising. 

“Are you done?” Parker asked calmly, as Santana took a step back, utterly confused as to why Parker had barely any reaction. She was probably used to the opposite when she stepped up like that. So Santana nodded, as a grin lit up on Parker’s face again. “Great! So the cat owes me two favours. Alright, let me see what I can do about the dude in there for ya.”

“That would be awesome, yes,” Santana grumbled, but still confused. 

“Did you know the Glee club?” Sebastian asked Parker, who fiddled with her sunglasses for a bit. She chewed on her lip, contemplating how to answer the question.

“I do, yes. I did a lot of deals with Mike, mainly to help him with studying. Poor kid. I offered him tutoring for free, but he declined it. He really wanted to pay me back somehow. I tutor Brittany. Not a deal. I did a deal with Kurt, I helped him get wedding stuff. I also helped Matt and Kurt transfer… they asked me. When I realized what was going on, I helped them for free. I also helped Kurt come back as well, and to get the Warblers into school when he did come back. I almost did a deal with Quinn, but… anyways. Artie wanted a deal, but it was too unrealistic for me to help him make it come true-”  _ She had to remind him that she wasn’t a literal devil, she can’t make him magically walk again.  _ “- so I compromised instead. Then there was Santana… I helped Rachel a little even though she’d never asked me for favours, Finn with his work, Jake was at the receiving end of a deal, Ryder with catfishing Katie though it seems that he found out somehow and the deal is forfeited, so it doesn’t count… Kitty, well, that’s a really long story and Marley, yet to ask me for a favour. But she had been on the receiving end of a deal-”

“Okay, okay, I get it-” Sebastian was cut off by Santana spinning right around and pinning Parker to the wall, anger blazing in her eyes. “Santana!”

“What did you do? Who asked for the deal?” Santana snapped. Parker’s head bounced a little on impact as she winced. Santana really had to push Parker hard, the other girl was built strong, something Santana hadn’t realized until she was pinning Parker against the wall. Parker’s muscles tensed, her grin dropped, and her jaw was set. Sebastian saw Parker’s fists open and close, as if testing, fist tightening to hear the silent crack of knuckles…

“Santana, no.” Sebastian pulled Santana off of the handyperson, who still didn’t move, light hitting the lenses where Sebastian could see the outline of a hard gaze through the sunglasses.

“Flowers,” Parker said calmly, though there was a hard edge to it. “Someone made a deal with me to give her flowers.”

Everybody relaxed at that, but it was becoming increasingly obvious that Parker was frowning, and something was wrong. Was something amiss in what she just said? Santana frowned, trying to decipher Parker’s expression.

Parker sighed, clarifying further. “Doesn’t she have a boyfriend?”

They both still stared at her. 

“Okay, when I first met Jake, he’s sweet and everything and I’m pretty sure he’d have his own balls to give Marley flowers from him.” Parker paused to let it sink in for them. “The person who asked me to give Marley flowers was not Jake.”

“Wait, I thought you don’t tell people who you do deals for?”

“It depends on the deal. If it’s studying, it’s fine. This person asked to be anonymous, but I never said I can’t tell anyone who they aren’t,” Parker shrugged, as they all reached the door. “The person was probably an admirer, Lord knows we have Jacob Ben Israel over Rachel Berry already, so it isn’t too much of a far swing…” 

Parker froze, eyes narrowing at the talking in the hallway, as Sebastian and Santana flanked her. Rachel had a rather cross look on her face, lightening a little upon seeing the three of them, as Millie and the man were having a heated discussion. Santana looked between Parker and the man, confused by the sudden stop.

“What the hell…”

“What is it?” Sebastian asked, but before they could do anything, Millie was letting the man into the room. Santana almost shrieked, Sebastian’s eyes almost popped out of his body, Parker ran down.

“Wait, wait, who’s that? Is that Marley’s dad?” Parker asked.

_ Snapdragons, mock oranges, jasmines, agrimonies, lavenders, azaleas, white carnations, dark pink roses, cinquefoils, sweetpeas. _

Parker remembered that bouquet very, very well. It was an odd collection of flowers, but a deal was a deal. 

Sebastian wasn’t sure why the handyperson had stopped, instead forcing his way into the room followed by Rachel. Finn remained rooted to the ground outside, as if in shock.

He was… sitting by Marley’s bed, staring down at her.

_ Snapdragons, mock oranges, jasmines, agrimonies, lavenders, azaleas, white carnations, dark pink roses, cinquefoils, sweetpeas. _

“Why are you here,” Santana blurted out, shoving Sebastian aside. 

Millie spoke up. “I let him in.”

“He made several racist comments to us last night,” Jake said.

“He was drunk!” Millie defended. “He didn’t know what he was doing. He’s changed.”

“Drunk man does what sober man wants,” Santana said. 

“He doesn’t mean any of that,” Millie said. “He’s changed.”

“I don’t see how people change THAT easily!” Santana seethed, before turning to Sebastian. “No offence, but you’re still an asshole.”

Sebastian winced. “None taken.”

“He’s trying to be better,” Millie argued. “Like him.”

“But Mrs. Rose, Sebastian hadn’t had a history like… your… uh… husband’s? Ex-husband’s? He’s not actively racist, he’s not… that abusive… he’s…” Rachel trailed off, looking at Sebastian, feeling like the comparison between both of them is similar but...

“I vote that we wait for Marley to decide,” Sebastian said, cutting in quickly.

“But my daughter has no idea what’s good in her to decide, she has brain damage,” Marley’s dad said sweetly, it almost made Santana puke.

“I didn’t tell you that, who told you that?” Sebastian asked.

“I spoke to the nurse.”

Finn was glaring holes into the man, Jake silently seething beside him.

Marley shifted, with a small groan. Everybody looked at her, coming forward. Jake was faster now, pushing past to be at her side. Parker saw the dark look the man shot Jake, stepping forward to sort of block Marley’s dad from coming closer. Sebastian quickly flanked Jake, allowing Millie to step closer and be at Marley’s side. Parker swallowed hard, suddenly looking like she didn’t want to be around.

“Marley?” Jake asked gently, picking up one of her pale and limp hands, pressing a kiss to the back of it. Marley groaned again, distress colouring her features, but her eyes refused to open.

“Marley, dear?” Millie asked.

“Marley…” Rachel said, before straightening. “Everybody else out.”

“What? She’s my daughter, I should see her-”

“Leave them be,” Parker snapped with more force than necessary, ushering Santana and Sebastian out, stepping out herself. “Please.”

He reluctantly followed, leaving the room only with Jake and Rachel, Millie stepping out to placate the man. Finn stepped in himself as Marley’s eyes cracked open, teary and unfocused. Her mouth opened, but all that came out was a garbled whisper. She looked to the side, where Jake was, and her eyes widened in recognition. Jake smiled at her, almost in relief, but she had a tear sliding down her face.

“Hey, hey,” Jake gently said, using his thumbs to wipe away the tears from her face. “Don’t cry.”

“No,” Marley uttered out, and it sounded so broken and sad that Rachel and Finn quickly flocked to her side as Jake almost reeled back in concern. “No.”

“Marls,” Jake said gently, “look at me?”

Marley only let out another wave of tears. “Why am I alive?”

This broke everybody’s heart. Rachel had an inkling this was the case, ever since the photos, the songs, the everything. 

“Hey… Marls?” Rachel asked gently, drawing the brunette’s attention away from Jake and towards Rachel and Finn. “Marley?”

Finn surprised Rachel yet again, by sitting upright and smiling gently at Marley. “Hey. Look what Quinn dropped off earlier.” He held up a stuffed white dog with a superman cape on it. “It’s… uh… Krypto the Superdog!”

Marley smiled at the gesture, as Finn handed her the stuffed dog.

“Thank you,” Marley said.

“I mean, I know you like cats better, but I asked Blaine what he thought you’d like for a stuffie, then I remembered that you guys did Superhero Week, and that you said you liked comics but didn’t want to show it, so I- I took the liberty of searching up a superhero animal closest to you, and I got Krypto. So that even if… Nightbird or anyone else in our league of superheroes can’t save you and be your backup, at least you’d have Krypto the Superdog with you to save you,” Finn explained. “It took Quinn a while to find it, but I think we just ended up getting a white dog and Tina sewing up the cape because she said she was bored, and also wanted to say sorry for everything that she had done… and that the rest of the Glee club can’t be here, because I don’t think the hospital can handle the excessive amount of Glee drama and sadness, so the rest of them…”

“Finn…” Marley smiled, cuddling the stuffie close. “Thank you.”

Rachel ran a hand through the fuzz of Marley’s hair, a gentle touch with the tips of her fingertips. Marley tensed under her hands, before slowly leaning into her touch. 

“I’m sorry,” Rachel whispered, causing Marley to look at her. “I’m so sorry…” 

“Why?” Marley asked, almost childlike as she cuddled the dog.

Jake and Rachel looked at each other, then looked at Finn, before Rachel forced a smile, continuing to run her fingertips through the fuzz.

“We won’t let anybody hurt you again. All of you.” Rachel tried not to let the tears spill over, as she looked at Marley’s broken blue eyes. “Okay?”

“It’s never over,” Marley whispered. “It never.”

“Marley,” Jake said gently, pressing another kiss to the back of her hand. “I love you.”

“Stupid.”

Jake frowned, unsure if Marley was directing that at him, or…

But Finn seemed to get it.

“What?” Finn asked, almost gently. “Do you… think you’re stupid?”

Marley looked to the side, after squinting at the underside of Krypto’s cape, where Tina had stitched a small, positive message. She nodded, prompting Jake to lean forward and gently forcing Marley to look at him. 

“You’re not stupid. No matter what you do, I will always love you.”

“We… can’t,” Marley said, softly. “You… deserve… more.” She turned to Rachel and Finn. “You… too.”

“Marley, we’re here. Even if you don’t want us here. Because the truth is, I know what it’s like to be in that dark spot, to be considered stupid. I know that you actually want help, you know you need our help… so…” Finn reached out for Marley’s casted hand, taking it and running his thumb over her knuckles. “We’ll be here. We’re not going anywhere. We’re not going to make fun of you for being slow, because you are still our Marley.”

“You don’t want me,” Marley said bitterly, and everybody was taken aback by the amount of self-deprecation in her voice. 

“We do. Maybe we can’t prove it in words. But we’ll prove it in actions,” Finn said softly. “We’re not going to leave you alone.”

Marley’s eyes flicked up to look at him, hazy and unfocused. 

“... I’m scared.” Her voice cracked in the middle of the admission, as Finn pulled up to her side and pulled her into his arms as she sobbed into his shirt.

“Can I have a word with you, Jake?” Rachel asked, softly.

Jake reluctantly let go of Marley’s hand, following Rachel to the corner of the room as Finn began to sing softly, rocking both of them back and forth.

**_Goodnight my angel, time to close your eyes…_ **

**_And save these questions for another day._ **

**_I think I know what you’ve been asking me…_ **

**_I think you know what I’ve been trying to say…_ **

“I know you love Marley, but…” Rachel looked at the ceiling. “I’m not trying to discourage you or anything, but… can you handle being one of the core people in her life?”

“Yes,” Jake said. “I can’t leave her now.”

“You can’t be driven by guilt to stay with her, Jake,” Rachel sighed. “If you stay now, and then find you can’t handle it later, it will break her heart. And that’s the last thing we need.”

**_I promised I would never leave you…_ **

**_Then you always know…_ **

**_Wherever you may go, no matter where you are…_ **

**_I never will be far away…_ **

“What about you?” Jake asked.

Rachel laughed to herself. “I sound like a hypocrite, don’t I? But you need to heal too. We’re all broken, Jake, but I’m less broken in this moment. You’re still affected by what’s going on.”

“What about Blaine?”

“Blaine is a different story,” Rachel sighed. “We’re trying to help him, but it would be good if he was with Marley, because they support each other.”

“We can support each other too,” Jake argued.

“No, you can’t. You don’t have that sibling-like connection with Blaine like Marley does. I don’t know how to explain it, Jake.”

**_Goodnight my angel, it’s time to sleep…_ **

**_And still so many things I want to say…_ **

**_Remember all the songs you sang for me…_ **

**_When we went sailing on an emerald bay..._ **

“I love her.”

“Jake, do you see yourself supporting her in the next few years?”

Jake’s mouth opened, then closed, as Rachel smiled sadly. “It feels cruel, but right now, Marley really needs a friend, not a lover. It’s not going to be healthy for both of you.”

“You don’t know that,” Jake said.

Rachel looked up to meet Finn’s eyes. 

“To a certain extent, I do.”

**_And like a boat out on the ocean…_ **

**_I’m rocking you to sleep…_ **

**_The water’s dark and deep, inside this ancient heart…_ **

**_You’ll always be a part of me…_ **

Jake saw her eyes and sighed, but a part of him remained stubborn. “You have no say in what we can or cannot do in our relationship.”

“I’m scared for both of you,” Rachel admitted, backing down. “But if you want to go on, sure.”

Why did Rachel sound so defeated?

Jake stared after her as Rachel gave a half-smile, looking back at Finn who was rocking Marley to sleep, Marley’s casted arm wrapped around Krypto, her other hand clutched onto Finn’s shirt, not letting go. Her eyes were drooping, red-rimmed and tired. 

**_Goodnight my angel, now it’s time to dream…_ **

**_And dream how wonderful your life will be…_ **

Rachel resisted a sob at that line.

**_Someday your child will cry and if you sing this lullaby…_ **

**_Then in your heart there will always be a part of me…_ **

Santana leaned against the door, which was open a crack as Parker leaned against the wall, arms folded, but clearly listening in. 

“What do you want me to do?” Parker asked, suddenly, voice lower and softer. “Clearly you can’t expect me to kick the man out now.”

Santana bit her lip, noticing the harsh tone that Parker had taken on in referring to Marley’s dad. But Parker sounded different now. Santana had to remind herself that this wasn’t the same person she had beaten up.

No, Parker had a steel spine now, a flash of dangerous eyes hidden behind a cold smile. There was the flex of deft fingers under her arms from where she had folded them. A silent threat. But she sounded soft.

_ Kitty what the fuck have you done?  _ Santana stared at Parker. Santana herself had mellowed out over the years, but it seemed clear that the opposite had happened to Parker, whose gaze was hardened and cool. If that was the case, why didn’t Parker leave yet?  _ What have I done? _

“Is this a deal?” Santana asked as Parker tilted her head, with another deft flex of her fingers, looking over Santana with an unreadable expression, gaze hardening further as if she didn’t like what she saw.

**_Someday we’ll all be gone…_ **

**_But lullabies they go on and on…_ **

**_They never die…_ **

**_That’s how you… and I…_ **

**_will be..._ **

“If you want it to be,” Parker said, eyes flicking to the slightly ajar door where Finn’s singing came from, and then her eyes softened, looking back at Santana. “What do you want me to do?”

Those words were powerful. Santana had the option of asking anything of Parker… for free. No deals, unless Santana wills it to be. It took her off guard.

Santana knew Parker’s skillset was probably good enough to track down the shooters. For one brief, vengeful moment, she imagined asking Parker to do just that- and then watching them rot and suffer in jail. Or maybe asking Parker to bring in some illegal contacts and have them beaten up. Or worse. Nobody hurts her family and gets away with it.

_ But. _

It’s not her place to make that call. It’s Sebastian’s, because his damn brother was the shooter. And Santana can’t presume what Sebastian wants, because they needed all the allies they could get at this point and her making the decision for Sebastian would literally make him hate her again. It’s his brother.

Sure, Parker would do it if she asked, no hesitation. Maybe she’d even add in extra, since it was personal- the school she went to was attacked, after all. But something about Parker’s tone, small and earnest, gave Santana pause on letting loose the McKinley devil on the Smythes.

“We need a few things,” Santana admitted slowly. “Their schoolwork. They still need to finish. Money’s not quite a big deal right now, but they need support and I don’t know where to find any,” Santana confessed, as Parker nodded intently. “Therapy would help, but for Marley, I don’t know where to find the help she needs.”

“Okay,” Parker nodded. “So schoolwork and support options. Got it.”

“One more thing,” Santana added. “Help me keep an eye on them. Sebastian won’t be around all the time and eventually we’ll all have to return from where we came from.”

Parker looked relatively uncomfortable. “I’m graduating soon. I’ll honor that request as long as I can- but I’m leaving Lima for New York when college starts- I can’t be around to check on them.”

There was an underlying reason, but Santana refused to push anymore.

“As long as you can. We’ll cross that bridge when we get there,” Santana reaffirmed.

Parker nodded. She hesitated, then opened a lollipop and popped it into her mouth. The stick bobbed, reminding her of the times she used to smoke. Parker’s eyes narrowed, hands slipping into her pockets.

“So what about the man?” Parker asked.

“Can you find out who he is?” Santana asked. Parker’s face slipped back into its cold, professional facade, gaze hardening as she cased the man. 

“Consider it done,” Parker affirmed, backing away from Santana. “You owe me a lot, Santana, though. I may be doing this one for free, but there’s a lot you haven’t given back to me.”

“And how exactly are you going to collect it?” Santana snarked, rolling her eyes. But inside, Parker’s cold change of attitude had greatly unnerved her. She wasn’t an idiot to not spot the callouses on her hands, black splotches of faded bruises on her knuckles, the careful watch of Parker’s eyes, the tense posture as if she was a coil ready to release all the energy. “You tried last time around.”

Parker’s sharp and alert eyes stopped wandering their surroundings to snap her frigid gaze directly at Santana. Her left hand jerked out of her pocket, and there was a flash of something shiny and white zooming at Santana faster than she could react. She felt the whoosh of the thing flying past her face by bare millimetres, before flying back around to Parker’s hand.

It was a playing card.

Santana reached up to her face, touching her cheek, before bringing her hand down to see a thin red line across her fingers. Parker’s intense, cold, emotionless gaze still bore right through her. 

“I don’t miss.”

The threat was short, clear and carefully punctuated. Santana felt like she needed to cower, at the monster she had helped create, but a bit of her pride reared back, trying to fight back.

“Not like you can do anything worse. What are you going to do, make me have a bunch of paper cuts?”

Parker tilted her head with morbid curiosity, looking at Santana like she was hung on the wall to dry. A wry smile spread across her lips, and the cold gaze became a little manic and sadistic. With relative ease, she recited the trio’s Bushwick loft address, forcing Santana to back up.

“I can find anyone, Santana,” Parker said dryly. “I do my job properly. Let’s say Mr. Brody Weston’s going to have tunnel vision that’s going to last him a long time.”

A chill ran down Santana’s spine. “You went to New York.”

“I did.” Parker’s head tilted the other way, expression turning thoughtful. “He still tried to come after Rachel. Pitiful man, really. I meant to ask him about something else- another deal- but well,  _ whoops. _ ” Parker’s smile became a manic grin. “My hand slipped.”

Santana already knew how shady Parker was. What Santana didn’t know was the depth of the shadiness.

“I should call the police.”

“And make what claim?” Parker asked, voice honey-sweet and cloying. “Nothing placed me anywhere at any time. Besides, something tells me you’re going to need my help hunting down those fools who shot up the school. I know it’s not your call to make, but…” Parker gave a smirk. “You know where to find me.”

“Wait a minute, you already know where they are!” Santana snapped, following Parker out of the hospital and into the parking lot. “Why the hell wouldn’t you go to the police?”

With one easy, fluid movement, Parker turned around and tripped Santana, pinning her against the ground facedown with her left hand pressed behind her back and her right arm jammed between her body and the hot asphalt. 

“Believe it or not, I’m not the only one with connections,” Parker hissed. “You want to risk losing me, Sebastian and Marley, possibly even Brittany? They’re going to strike again, ensure victory for themselves. We only have one chance at this.” Parker released Santana. “I’m your finishing blow. Once we miss… it’s game over.”

Parker got off of her. She averted her gaze, tone dropping from its harsh tone as she backed away from Santana, allowing her an opportunity to rush Parker if she so desired. But Santana had an inkling that Parker would expect that, it would be like moving an immovable wall. Her smile turned tired as she put her hands back into her pockets, fishing out her phone and reading it. “Another deal. See you later.”

_ Ain’t no rest for the wicked.  _

Santana got up and watched Parker get into the truck, but the truck made no movements, nor did the engines rev up to leave. Santana let her be, walking back to the hospital, rubbing her wrist where Parker had grabbed it. She walked into Kitty and Brittany’s room and huffed, sitting next to Brittany and absently grabbing her free hand.

“I don’t remember Ser Detective being that cryptic. Or threatening.”

“She’s sweet,” Brittany insisted.

“Everybody’s sweet to you,” Santana pointed out.

“She can be scary,” Brittany pouted. “But she’s actually just like a cuddly wolf.”

“Wolf?”

“Yeah! She’s all mean and growly on the outside but she’s actually a big softie like you!” Brittany smiled.

“I’m not even sure how to address that…” Kitty mumbled. “She’s scary. I swear she can probably hide a body. Get away with murder.”

The imposing figure of Parker, dark eyes, cold, calculated gaze- ice cold to white hot fire, sadistic, evil gleam in her eyes, face set in a snarl. The weight of Parker on her back, the stinging feel of the cut on her face.

“I can see why you all are scared of her.”

Brittany looked at her, looking concerned. “She tagged you! I told her not to do that anymore.”

Santana laughed. Only Brittany had the power to do that. Convince somebody deadly to pout and stop doing dangerous things. It happened to her. Brittany was too sweet sometimes.

Speaking of…

“Why did Parker offer this deal for free?” Santana asked. “I don’t think Ser Detective is that sweet.”

Brittany tilted her head at Santana. “You didn’t know?”

“Know what?”

“Even the Devil has her soft spots.”

Had it been before, Santana would have killed to find Parker’s soft spots in an irrational need to make everybody hurt just as much as she did. But now, Santana was tired of lashing out. Brittany had that knowing look on her face, as if she knew something Santana didn’t.

“Who?” Santana asked.

“Who else? I told her to chase what her heart wants for once.”

_ For once?  _

Now Santana felt terrible. Brittany looked… regretful? They all had fucked up pasts but Santana didn’t fuck Parker up any further, right? 

Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a oneshot of Parker's origins and backstory in the series, so... yay... go check that out...

**Author's Note:**

> Come yell at me at my tumblr! I think I deserve it. It's called insert_pun_here_now.
> 
> Leave comments and feedback! Some prompts for little scenes inbetween are also appreciated!
> 
> I tried to be accurate with as much medical information as possible, but please do take it with a grain of salt.


End file.
